Should I rush? - Page 3

icicle22 · #31 12-04-2006, 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by icicle22

Yeah, I pretty much know that I have to talk with them about it.

I'm just rather nervous about doing it.

AChiOhSnap · #32 12-04-2006, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by icicle22

I'm just rather nervous about doing it.

The more you prepare, the more you can counter any concerns they may have about Greek life.

If your mom and dad are worried your grades will drop, you can talk about how sororities have mandatory study hours/weekly study breaks/tutoring programs with older sisters or whatever you have on your campus. Talk about the disparity between Greek GPA and overall campus GPA (if it's higher).

If they're worried about money, lay out a specific plan on how exactly you're going to pay for sorority membership.

If they're worried about you partying, you can tell them that you could easily find people to party with, even outside of Greek membership.

Tell them how excited you are about the philanthropies and how much time Greeks on your campus give to charitable causes. Get excited about all the things you're looking forward to in a potential sorority membership, and if their fears are alleviated, hopefully your enthusiasm will catch on. Good luck!

icicle22 · #33 12-04-2006, 01:30 PM

I think they're pretty much worried about all of the above, but nevertheless, I hope I can try to convince them that sorority life has good benefits.

ASUADPi · #34 12-04-2006, 11:24 PM

When I started college my parents weren't major anti-greek, they more just didn't understand it (neither of my parents went to college at the age of 18-22, they went when they were in their mid thirties, married, with 3 kids, so GL wasn't really an option for them). Anyways, I decided to rush, had a great time and obviously was offered a bid.

They supported in "their" way. It wasn't the financial aspect though. It was hard, but I was determined.

In all honesty, my grades falling had nothing to do with ADPi, but more me 1) not going to classes 2) not studying and 3) not going to classes. In fact, joing ADPi made me want to do better because I discovered (although not until like the end of the semester) that I had sisters in every single class.

It really wasn't until about 3 years ago that my parents started "respecting" the sorority. (Long story short: I went to CA to meet some ADPi GC sisters. One of my sisters, who I didn't know other than the net, offered to let me stay with her. My parents thought that was such a great thing for her to do since she didn't know me. I told my parents "but I'm her sister"). Now, they still really don't "get it" but they definately "appreciate" it. I'm not sure if I'm making much sense or not.

Anyways, the whole point of me saying this is to say, I understand where you are coming from, since my parents didn't really support my decision to join GL.

I would make a list before talking to your parents. And then read from that list. Maybe even encourage your parents to visit the websites to all the chapters on your schools campus.

AChiOhSnap · #35 12-04-2006, 11:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by icicle22

I think they're pretty much worried about all of the above, but nevertheless, I hope I can try to convince them that sorority life has good benefits.

Do as much research about the benefits of greek life as you can, and hopefully you can win them over before next recruitment

As long as you're prepared to counter their concerns, that's all you can do.

violetpretty · #36 12-05-2006, 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AChiOhSnap

If they're worried about you partying, you can tell them that you could easily find people to party with, even outside of Greek membership.

I definitely second this. You do NOT have to be Greek to party, especially when you're a girl.

icicle22 · #37 12-05-2006, 01:21 PM

That's true...even some of the people I know, who are non-Greeks, drink and go to parties.

CuriousWildcat · #38 12-05-2006, 02:33 PM

I have found that with my parents its always best to have sort of a presentation prepared. I had to convince my parents to let me rush. In my "presentation" I told them what rush would be like and the pros/cons of joining a sorority. I researched online to find out the questions that parents usually ask. Here is the link to the UK Greek parent guide. It's from 2005, but the questions and info at the end should help you with some of the problems your parents may have with joining a GLO.

http://www.uky.edu/StudentAffairs/Gr...tguide2005.pdf

You might want to see if there is something like this on your school's website that is more specific to their rules/policies.

DaffyKD · #39 12-05-2006, 03:03 PM

Back many moons ago when I went through rush, my mother did everything in her power to discourage me. I had no intentions of pledging. I was the HS geek, had few friends and knew that "those" girls would never want me to be a part of their organization. I only went through rush so that I could go move out of the house a week early since rush was the week before dorms opened. I had planned to go to the required first day parties, drop out of rush and spend the rest of the week on the beach. Well... best laid plans..... I ended up pledging, loving it and have been the President of my Alumnae Association for the last 3 years.

My parents came down to "Pledge Presents", met the sisters and really liked what they saw. When my sister started college it was almost a forgone conclusion that she would rush whether she wanted to or not. She never pledged, Mom realized that every campus is different.

Today, Mom is right there supporting our philanthropic fund raisers.

Good luck

DaffyKD

icicle22 · #40 12-05-2006, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CuriousWildcat

I have found that with my parents its always best to have sort of a presentation prepared. I had to convince my parents to let me rush. In my "presentation" I told them what rush would be like and the pros/cons of joining a sorority. I researched online to find out the questions that parents usually ask. Here is the link to the UK Greek parent guide. It's from 2005, but the questions and info at the end should help you with some of the problems your parents may have with joining a GLO.

http://www.uky.edu/StudentAffairs/Gr...tguide2005.pdf

You might want to see if there is something like this on your school's website that is more specific to their rules/policies.

Yeah...I was thinking of making a presentation myself, which would show the pros and cons on being Greek, as well as the costs of housing and being a member.

knitsnpurls · #41 12-05-2006, 05:08 PM

My parents weren't against me joining a sorority, but they were somewhat resistant to the idea at first for several reasons. One of which being the stereotypes, and another was the cost. As a junior, joining a sorority was not an expense they had planned for ahead of time.

I talked to them about it gradually and involved them in the whole process. I visited our Greek Affairs website with my mom, pointed out friends of mine who were in sororities, and gave them links to the national websites of all the sororities on my campus. And throughout rush, I would call home each night and tell my parents what I had done that day and how I was feeling. It wasn't until a few hours before Pref Night, that both of my parents told me to go for it and not to worry.

I think the logic behind it was to see how badly I really wanted it. If it was just an impulse they could talk me out of, or if it was something I was really willing to stick out. A few weeks ago, my mom told me it's the happiest and most outgoing she's ever seen me and that they definitely made the right choice in letting me join.

Long story short, it's definitely possible to win over parents who aren't exactly thrilled at first, just try to keep them as informed as possible. Good luck!

icicle22 · #42 12-05-2006, 05:24 PM

I think I should at least keep them informed, at least that is the best course of action.

adpiucf · #43 12-05-2006, 05:30 PM

My parents weren't supportive, but I decided that since I was paying for college that I would be making the decisions on how to spend my time and my money, especially since I was working my way through. On Bid Day, I got a really nice surprise: not only did I get my first choice but my parents were so happy for me that they paid my entire first semester's dues. After that, they remained a bit skeptical of the value of my membership, but we won them over during Parents Weekend. Since then, they have met my Greek friends and sorority sisters, and have come to see it is a supportive and enriching environment.

tinkerbellnell · #44 12-05-2006, 06:37 PM

My parents arent really that supportive. They think that its dangerous, because they believe the things that are shown in movies. But, they can trust that if I was in a situation where there could be physical harm that I wouldnt just go along with it. Its dissapointing to me that they think so badly about an organization that Im looking to join myself with for life, but hopefully with time as I go through rush and then hopefully new membering (keep your fingers crossed) they will understand.

AGDee · #45 12-05-2006, 09:49 PM

My dad was totally supportive because he is a TKE. My mom, however, was not at all supportive because she wasn't in a sorority and dated a TKE. Apparently, the sorority women at that time (late 50's) weren't too pleased that a GDI was dating a fraternity man and treated her poorly. Once I had joined though, and she had attended our first Mother-Daughter tea, she was so impressed with the women in my chapter that she became very supportive. She is still supportive as I'm involved as an alumna now. She recently said "I think that sorority thing you do is a really good thing".