Sexualize your daughters? At what age?

[Taualumna]

But that clubbing style really isn't geared to adults. Lately, women's styles seen in the magazines and in stores have been more "lady-like" than "ho-like". It is only the tweens and teens that are trying to look like they're going clubbing.

[33girl]

When I was 7, it was "OMG, Cher is showing her navel."

When I was 17, it was "OMG, Madonna is writhing on the MTV stage."

When I was 27, it was "OMG, Janet Jackson has a guy's hands over her boobs."

In the words of Andy Rooney, it's amazing how long this country has been going to hell without ever having gotten there.

[RACooper]

Basically my daughter would be allowed to dress how she wants... it's just I'll only pay for some clothes . Seriously I hope that my daughter would be intelligent enough not to fall for the media trap of using sexuality to sell clothing.

As for younger kids dressing they way they do now... it was unfortunately to be expected, because I can remember the numerous articles discussing the rising spending power of "tweens". It was simply exploiting another economic niche.

As for Feminism being responsible for the this sexualization of younger and younger girls... BS. I come from a family with a long history of feminism so I have been exposed to the traditional ideals of the movement all my life... and from what I seem to recall it was about the empowerment of women, based on values and charactersitics that were seperate from their sex (and by extension overt expressions of sexuality).

[Taualumna]

Originally posted by RACooper
Basically my daughter would be allowed to dress how she wants... it's just I'll only pay for some clothes . Seriously I hope that my daughter would be intelligent enough not to fall for the media trap of using sexuality to sell clothing.

As for younger kids dressing they way they do now... it was unfortunately to be expected, because I can remember the numerous articles discussing the rising spending power of "tweens". It was simply exploiting another economic niche.

As for Feminism being responsible for the this sexualization of younger and younger girls... BS. I come from a family with a long history of feminism so I have been exposed to the traditional ideals of the movement all my life... and from what I seem to recall it was about the empowerment of women, based on values and charactersitics that were seperate from their sex (and by extension overt expressions of sexuality).

Suffrage/"Famous Five" feminism and post WWII "Feminazi" Feminism are not and should never be put in the same box, assuming that your family has been connected to the former.

[Lady Pi Phi]

I don't want to have a daughter.
I don't want to have to worry about her going out dressed like a dime-store hooker. I don't want to her to worry about body image, I don't want to worry that she'll come home pregnant at 13. Oh, I hope I have sons.

In case I don't have sons, I want to make sure my daughter is dressed appropriately for her age. And while I'm buying her close I will decide what is age appropriate. If she wants to wear makeup, she'll be taught how to apply it properly. I want to make sure that my daughter knows the ramifications of dressing like a "floosy". I see some young girls out today and I wonder what their parents were thinking.

[Taualumna]

Originally posted by Lady Pi Phi
I don't want to have a daughter.
I don't want to have to worry about her going out dressed like a dime-store hooker. I don't want to her to worry about body image, I don't want to worry that she'll come home pregnant at 13. Oh, I hope I have sons.

In case I don't have sons, I want to make sure my daughter is dressed appropriately for her age. And while I'm buying her close I will decide what is age appropriate. If she wants to wear makeup, she'll be taught how to apply it properly. I want to make sure that my daughter knows the ramifications of dressing like a "floosy". I see some young girls out today and I wonder what their parents were thinking.

Best idea: be a stay-at-home mother or work at home (which hopefully will be more possible in the near future. We already have the technology to do it, but it's just that many companies WON'T do it!) That way, if you have kids, you can control their behaviour.

[RACooper]

Originally posted by Taualumna
Suffrage/"Famous Five" feminism and post WWII "Feminazi" Feminism are not and should never be put in the same box, assuming that your family has been connected to the former.

Actually I would classify radical Feminism with most radical movements, a product of the 60's. Even then it was an extension of the base arguement of being judged as a person not as a woman, hence the doing away with sexual identifiers or "constrants" (ie. the whole bra burning, not shaving thing). It was the 70's that saw rise the militant feminism or the infamous "Feminazi's" you see wandering around campus...

[SilverTurtle]

This is really OT, but all the feminist stuff makes me want to say it:

Check out a book by Susan Douglas called Where the Girls Are. And if you think you're not a feminist - read the introduction.

My mom - who gave me all of my feminist values - always shuns the label because of the 'feminazi' association. But when she read that intro she laughed and told me I was right all along - she really is a feminsit.

[wrigley]

Originally posted by Taualumna
Best idea: be a stay-at-home mother or work at home (which hopefully will be more possible in the near future. We already have the technology to do it, but it's just that many companies WON'T do it!) That way, if you have kids, you can control their behaviour.

It's good in theory but I recall there were always girls who left home dressed one way and on the bus or at school changed outfits.

As for tweens buying power, unless babysitting is paying more than a entry level corporate job , these kids are getting cash from somewhere.Last time I checked child labor laws are in place. And I won't start on the issue of allowances.

[Taualumna]

Originally posted by wrigley
It's good in theory but I recall there were always girls who left home dressed one way and on the bus or at school changed outfits.

As for tweens buying power, unless babysitting is paying more than a entry level corporate job , these kids are getting cash from somewhere.Last time I checked child labor laws are in place. And I won't start on the issue of allowances.

That's why many schools have dress codes that don't allow very short skirts or pants, loud t-shirts, the display of bra straps, non-religious headgear, etc...maybe more schools should do that. Anyway, I'm sure twelve years ago, people were complaining about how teens were dressing inappropriately because of the grunge movement. It's just that we covered ourselves back then, so there was no "sexualization" of young girls. However, the clothes certainly weren't "lady-like" either.

[33girl]

May I just state how much I hate the word "tweens"? Ugh.

[kappaloo]

Originally posted by Taualumna
Best idea: be a stay-at-home mother or work at home (which hopefully will be more possible in the near future. We already have the technology to do it, but it's just that many companies WON'T do it!) That way, if you have kids, you can control their behaviour.

Or just be a good parent while also working away from home in a dual-family income - it is possible! Because the mother and father works is NO excuse for poor parenting skills.

[James]

Where do people learn good parenting skills? what are their models?

Originally posted by kappaloo
Or just be a good parent while also working away from home in a dual-family income - it is possible! Because the mother and father works is NO excuse for poor parenting skills.

[aephi alum]

Originally posted by wrigley
It's good in theory but I recall there were always girls who left home dressed one way and on the bus or at school changed outfits.

This is also (in addition to Taualumna's point about dress codes) why you have to try to get your kids to internalize the message that some clothes are just inappropriate for certain situations, like school.

Once when I was in high school, a girl showed up in a see-through top with nothing but a bra underneath. A teacher saw her and sent her home to change. And he was criticized for it - by the school and by the girl's parents! Apparently he shouldn't have been looking at her boobs.

[XOMichelle]

I think it's really hard to control the behavior of children at any age. Some children respond to parenting and advice better than others, no matter how much their parents may try. I remember being very sneaky when there was something I wanted to buy or do and I knew my mom was against it. If I have a daughter (which I hope I do.. I'm not sure I coould deal with a little boy), I hope to teach her to stand up for herself, be involved, be considerate and to find the things and people in life that make her happy. If she wants to show her navel at 13, it might be a battle I choose not to fight. I'll be more worried about her grades.