Alumni/Alumnae who don't know their place

I sent a text to Jane earlier just mentioning a few of my concerns casually and she sent me back a rather long response because she realized after meeting that she had acted out of line. She apologized to the president, and told me that if she starts doing it again to just kick her under the table

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by NotSoOldAlumna

Advice please on how to address this with her? Should I wait until I'm officially an advisor? Should I have a heart to heart with her before then, sister-to-sister?

This is a little bit of a lane swerve, but here are a few observations:

1) Is there some sort of adviser hierarchy? Is there someone who sort of oversees all of the other alumnae advisers? I'd go to her first with this issue.

2) After 1) and assuming they dealt with it, you ought to wait until it's official and you're an adviser. You want to be able to come from a position of legitimacy and not appear to simply be meddling in affairs which the recent alumna might think are none of your business.

3) Make sure you're the most appropriate person to deal with this. If not, bring it to the attention of whoever is the most appropriate.

4) Finally, I'm not sure how your meetings are run, but it might be appropriate (again, if you're the appropriate person to be advising these folks) to instruct your parliamentarian and President to enforce strict parliamentary procedure (if applicable) in that you don't get to speak unless you are recognized by the chair and that it is a privilege, not a right for an alumna to be recognized at a chapter meeting.

Originally Posted by Kevin

This is a little bit of a lane swerve, but here are a few observations:

Is there some sort of adviser hierarchy? Is there someone who sort of oversees all of the other alumnae advisers? I'd go to her first with this issue. There isn't, unfortunately. Each oversees a certain "area" of the chapter (recruitment, philanthropy, etc) but there's no head honcho.

Finally, I'm not sure how your meetings are run, but it might be appropriate (again, if you're the appropriate person to be advising these folks) to instruct your parliamentarian and President to enforce strict parliamentary procedure (if applicable) in that you don't get to speak unless you are recognized by the chair and that it is a privilege, not a right for an alumna to be recognized at a chapter meeting. This has been an area where the chapter has struggled. The new parliamentarian is working really hard to get things run in an orderly fashion... for the past few years meetings have been semi-controlled chaos with a lot of side-chatter, interrupting, etc.

I think you hit the nail on the head re: parliamentary procedure. That will eliminate 80% of the issues with actives and alum

[Mevara]

Haha... didn't even look at the usernames! Why would you have two accounts?!

Originally Posted by Mevara

Haha... didn't even look at the usernames! Why would you have two accounts?!

Locked myself out of this account, and didn't want to wait until I got home to do a password recovery (can't access the email from work). Finally remembered the password halfway through the afternoon, and wanted replies emailed to my primary email

AKA I had a blonde moment

[Old_Row]

Originally Posted by stargazertechie

Locked myself out of this account, and didn't want to wait until I got home to do a password recovery (can't access the email from work). Finally remembered the password halfway through the afternoon, and wanted replies emailed to my primary email

AKA I had a blonde moment

I just looked at your old posts then google and OMG. Why would you use this name again?

[33girl]

Get Jane a good (or at least tiring) job and a consistent booty call. I guarantee she will stop coming to chapter meetings.

I don't think it "creepy" to show up at events after you're an alumnae (I guess if pre-graduation deactivation is rife at your school you would be deluded enough to think this, but whatever) but as someone who has sat through oodles of sorority and fraternity meetings, I assure you, I would never WANT to sit through another one that wasn't mandatory, unless I was asked or for something special like BabyPink mentioned. (Or unless these meetings have wine.)