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Welcome to our newest member, Richardesozy |
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08-26-2012, 01:04 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,360
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Okay people, let's back off. utgirl94, you've said your part and we recognize how devastating it is.
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08-26-2012, 01:09 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Queens, NY
Posts: 6,304
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Quote:
Originally Posted by utgirl94
I REALIZE THAT. I AM NOT ASKING FOR THE REASON WHY, I DIDNT REALIZE IF YOU HAD ALL FULL PARTIES THAT COULD HAPPEN AND WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU WERENT SO HARSH.
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Really?
Quote:
Originally Posted by utgirl94
I just wish I had an explanation as to why i was "released"
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Quote:
Originally Posted by utgirl94
How do I sign up for COB? and What may be some of the reasons I was released??
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__________________
I believe in the values of friendship and fidelity to purpose
@~/~~~~
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08-26-2012, 01:12 PM
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Banned
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 14,733
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Quote:
Originally Posted by carnation
Okay people, let's back off. utgirl94, you've said your part and we recognize how devastating it is.
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The discussion will die on its own. I think utgirl94 will grasp what they are saying.
Last edited by DrPhil; 08-26-2012 at 01:14 PM.
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08-26-2012, 01:23 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 705
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Quote:
Originally Posted by utgirl94
I REALIZE THAT. I AM NOT ASKING FOR THE REASON WHY, I DIDNT REALIZE IF YOU HAD ALL FULL PARTIES THAT COULD HAPPEN AND WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU WERENT SO HARSH.
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utgirl,
I hope this all works out for the greater good for you -- I know of several great girls who had a difficult experience their freshman year, but returned to rush -- stronger than ever -- as sophmores.
I hope that you will throw your energies into involvement on campus. One way or another, this will help you meet people, make friends, and network. Should you decide to rush later, you will not only have great activities to list, you will know existing members in the chapters.
(hugs) The only way to guarantee that you will never be Greek (or anything else) is not to try. Try out for other campus positions/organizations/honor societies as well -- even those you don't make provide great interview experience, which will come in handy even beyond your college years.
Best of luck to you.
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08-26-2012, 01:41 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ASTalumna06
Really?
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When I asked for an explanation I wasnt asking for one reason why. I was wondering if it was possible for them to all cut me which I now see it was.
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08-26-2012, 01:57 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: N 37.811092 W -107.664643
Posts: 5,321
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utgirl,
it has to do with mathematical formulas. You didn't meet the invitation "cutoff" point for any of the chapters, based on mathematics (RFM). The Why is something we cannot answer.
Yes, it hurts. It will only continue to hurt if you dwell on it and wallow in it. I might refer you to The Work by Byron Katie (google it - she has YouTube videos) as a means of handling this situation you find yourself in.
FWIW one of my favorite Thetas is a woman that was released from recruitment her freshman year. She focused on her academics and on behaving herself and on involving herself in some campus activities. And she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went through recruitment the following year. We talked about it afterwards, when she opened up about her freshman experience, and she shared how hurt she was as a freshman, but that she was grateful that she'd had her freshman year to grow up and adjust to college.
__________________
"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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08-26-2012, 02:08 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Yoknapatawpha
Posts: 1,790
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AzTheta
FWIW one of my favorite Thetas is a woman that was released from recruitment her freshman year. She focused on her academics and on behaving herself and on involving herself in some campus activities. And she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went through recruitment the following year. We talked about it afterwards, when she opened up about her freshman experience, and she shared how hurt she was as a freshman, but that she was grateful that she'd had her freshman year to grow up and adjust to college.
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AzTheta, I have the exact same experience! The woman I am thinking of went on to be our Theta Chapter President, a traveling consultant for two cycles, and has served as Advisory Board Chairwoman recently. She absolutely rocks and I feel privileged to know her. Life gave her lemons, but she CHOSE to make lemonade with them.
Make this experience a positive one and you will set yourself up to succeed in spite of what life chooses to throw at you.
__________________
Yesterday, today, and tomorrow, Kappa Alpha Theta exists to nurture each member throughout her college and alumna experience and to
offer a lifelong opportunity for social, intellectual, and moral growth as she meets the higher and broader demands of a mature life.
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08-26-2012, 02:11 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 18,190
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Sorry this happened to you. Good read for you:
http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=89902
Best of luck in the future.
__________________
"Remember that apathy has no place in our Sorority." - Kelly Jo Karnes, Pi
Lakers Nation.
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08-26-2012, 02:19 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: I can't seem to keep track!
Posts: 5,807
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Contact the office of Greek Life immediately to register your interest for COB and informal recruitment events. Get involved on campus-- great way to move past the disappointment, stay busy and make new friends. You will also meet sorority women this way! Make academics a priority and don't embarrass yourself socially. Good luck!
__________________
Click here for some helpful information about sorority recruitment and recommendations.
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08-26-2012, 04:00 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 23
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Utgirl, I am so sorry that things did not work out for you this time. There are usually several chapters that participate in a smaller, more relaxed recruitment early in the spring semester. Check in with the Panhellenic office to find out when it will be held and how to sign up for that.
If you don't want to go that route, UT does have a separate quota for upperclassmen and you can wait until next year to go through formal recruitment again. This seems to work best for girls who have several close friends in the same chapter.
Either way, you have options. Right now, find some campus organizations you are interested in, get involved, and make the best grades you can make this semester.
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08-26-2012, 04:18 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 273
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I'm really sorry things did not work out for you. Register for COB, stay active and involved, and keep on being classy.
My cousin went through recruitment last year at another SEC school. She was released from my house after round 2. She was released from all houses after round 3 (and found out the morning she was getting ready for pref). It was devastating for her and I very personally felt her heartbreak. I couldn't even answer for her why MY house released her (as I did not know, nor should I) and certainly she had great grades and recs and all the other things we talk about here.
But she kept going. She got involved with her residence hall and an organization for her major. She made time for the gym every day and tried to keep up friendships with girls from her Pi Chi group who had all ended up in different houses. Three weeks after Bid Day, I got a call one night. "Jen, what does COB mean?" I explained it to her and asked (very cautiously) where she had been invited. I was thrilled to find out it was my own house. They had made quota but a couple of women had dropped and they were looking to specifically extend her a bid. The house that cut her before others is now her happy home and I'm over the moon to be able to call her my sister!
No one can say what might happen for you... but this may not be the end of your journey. Best of luck to you and I hope you have a wonderful year!
__________________
Love, labor, learning, and loyalty -
Gamma Phi Beta means so much to me.
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08-26-2012, 04:22 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Lake Wylie, SC
Posts: 451
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It is really hard to see this happen to anyone, but unfortunately it is one of those things. Hopefully you will take the advice to heart and either in Spring or Fall next year, you can still have the Greek experience you are looking for. And I am sure when you do, you will appreciate it all the more.
I have seen weird things happen with recruitment - I've seen chapters cut their throats by releasing too many women and/or women dropping a chapter for different reasons only to end up in that same chapter later as a snap bid or COB.
Many of us on this board remember the day when you could go to all pref parties (2 on my campus) and completely mismatch and end up with nothing - that is also an awful situation and had nothing to do with these girls personally and it's just the way the cookie crumbles sometimes.
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08-26-2012, 04:22 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 7
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If you get released, do you get your money back.
Also, are you required to live on campus to go through recruitment?
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08-26-2012, 04:25 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,360
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No and usually no.
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08-26-2012, 04:42 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 61
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It's hardly ever that they don't want you - just that they wanted someone else more - and that doesn't mean that all of the members wanted someone else more. And they are limited in number as to who they can invite. Check out COB and DO NOT resent the fact that you weren't invited to pref.
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