Dear PNM's and their moms

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

That's where the balance comes in.

Co-sign. The idea that it has to be all one (complete inclusion with no losers) or all the other (total competition) is short-sighted.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by BAMA2

The problem with letting everyone make everything is that kids never have the experience of saying to themselves "well I didn't make this, maybe I should go try something different that I may be good at and that I might like even better".

We touched on this in another thread, but the thing is there's hierarchies and "tiers" even in kids' activities, among the moms.

Say a kid loves baseball and HATES soccer...but soccer is the "in" thing run by all the "in" parents and the Little League isn't. Some parents in that case won't even let their kids try out for LL.

I have nothing against SAHMs but there are ones who perpetuate this kind of crap who really need to go GET A FREAKIN JOB.

Disclaimer: I do not have children or run in these circles. I absorb enough of it through my friends and Facebook.

[NutBrnHair]

Originally Posted by 33girl

We touched on this in another thread, but the thing is there's hierarchies and "tiers" even in kids' activities, among the moms.

Hmm...I thought you didn't believe in tiers.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by NutBrnHair

Hmm...I thought you didn't believe in tiers.

Hmm...for a second I thought this wasn't passive aggressive at all.

Oh yeah, no I didn't - just kidding.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by NutBrnHair

Hmm...I thought you didn't believe in tiers.

Hmmmm when someone starts their sentence with "Hmmm" is it ever anything but someone trying to be bitchy while pretending to be nice?


Hmmmm.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by NutBrnHair

Hmm...I thought you didn't believe in tiers.

You act like the tiers are fairies. If she doesn't believe in them, does that mean they don't really exist?!

[33girl]

Originally Posted by NutBrnHair

Hmm...I thought you didn't believe in tiers.

Hmmm, I thought you had stopped post stalking me.

But since you obviously have anything I ever posted on a DVD that you keep under your pillow, please quote one post where I ever said I don't believe that there is such a thing as tiers.

[SWTXBelle]

I believe in tiers - I simply think they are subjective and counterproductive to a healthy NPC recruitment.

[greekmomjo]

We do this generation NO FAVORS by not teaching them earlier that you don't always get what you want. This is a generation in which every kid got a soccer trophy, participation medal or ribbon for even showing up!

[preciousjeni]

Originally Posted by 33girl

But since you obviously have anything I ever posted on a DVD that you keep under your pillow

Bwahahahahahahahaha!

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by greekmomjo

We do this generation NO FAVORS by not teaching them earlier that you don't always get what you want. This is a generation in which every kid got a soccer trophy, participation medal or ribbon for even showing up!

The solution is to encourage them to try out for competitive teams, too. It's IMO not a good solution for some children to constantly face rejection, whether that's the reality of their adult future or not. Having them enter school art competitions, or trying out for school plays is good. Signing them up for a soccer team where everyone gets a trophy at the same time is good, too.

[Amicus]

Last year, the daughter of a very old friend of mine was released from recruitment early at a competitive rush.

The young woman might have taken the cut too well. There were no tears, no anger, not even a loud silence. Her feeling was "hey, if no chapter wants me, that's their loss, not mine."

My friend was a bit surprised by her attitude. He and his ex-wife was expecting tears and/or rage. Now, he is not sure if his daughter is wise way beyond her years or has an ego the size of Brazil.

Tears, he said, he could deal with. A mature teenager isn't discussed in the daddy handbook.

[gold and pearls]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I had a friend who coached cheer who quit when her director wanted her to get rid of tryouts for the 4th/5th grade team. He had gotten some parental complaints from those girls who hadn't made it last year, and he wanted to make it more "fair."

He probably didn't force the choir to accept a tone deaf kid with no rhythm (that would have been me as a child) or the academic team to take any dumb kids in his quest for fairness.

Originally Posted by ASUADPi

Now everything is about placating them. When I coached freshmen cheer in 08. I could take 12-15 girls (I say that number because it was "up in the air" of whether I would get a new uniform or not, if not only 12 girls, if so 15). Well I was essentially "forced" by the head coach to take 12 girls and 2 alternates and 1 manager. Only like 2 girls were cut. I was like really this is stupid. I only had like 17 girls trying out in the first place.

Also, doesn't this make it even worse for the only 2 who are rejected. If you'd taken 12, there would at least have been 5 that didn't make the cut. Now you've really singled out the extra pathetic. (Not you personally, but you know...)

[Low C Sharp]

He probably didn't force the choir to accept a tone deaf kid with no rhythm

Whoo boy, there definitely are choirs that are forced to take everyone, even in high school. For 4th/5th grade, most of them are forced to take everyone. Heck, in my school the kids had to participate in choir up through middle school as part of music class -- even the kids couldn't cut themselves from the choir! It is quite unusual to have competitive auditions in elementary school unless we're talking about a pre-professional, traveling choir.
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WEB SHOWS

[33girl]

Yeah, we pretty much all had to sing in public at least once a year through 6th grade, whether we could or not, whether we liked it or not.

I kind of wonder what cheerleaders are needed for in the lower grades to begin with. Do elementary schools have interscholastic sports now?