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Originally Posted by DrPhil
I see what you and Titchou mean and partly agree.
Howeverrrrrrrrrrr, there are people who would be socially awesome under any other circumstances but it doesn't work well in a membership intake environment. I'm speaking in terms of NPHC right now but that probably also applies to non-NPHC. For instance, I know of men and women who seem really cool, charming, funny, and friendly. Part of it was their "natural" charm and the rest was excellent upbringing. But, it was TOO MUCH for membership intake both when they were aspirants and when they were members bringing in new members. It was interpreted differently. Also, what many people consider being a "lady" or "gentleman" (I kind of hate those terms) doesn't fly well with everyone. Another instance of relativity.
This is why we have training. I don't want anyone thinking they already have "it" and therefore they don't have to worry about the dos and don'ts of the process. These people often fail miserably and are humbled big time.
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This was pretty much me in a nutshell as an undergrad.

I could converse with random people I met at parties, in class, etc - but when it came to rush I often downright sucked. My sorority did so much for me that when it came to putting across why I wanted other people to share it with me, it was nearly impossible to convey. It's like being in love with someone so much that you just turn into a blithering idiot.
There was a really good article in our magazine one time about being frustrated at rush - the line that resonated with me was something along the lines of "Throwing open our bonds to everyone, many of whom are often rushing only to pick you apart, is not easy."