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10-02-2007, 06:15 PM
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Some places giving up your pin to a girl puts you back to pledge status, so you really have to want to give it to her. If my bf were in Greek, I wouldn't ask him to suffer for me, even if it is a really sweet gesture. We haven't had one in my house in over five years, although another chapter had one a year or two ago. At WSU, it seems to be extremely rare.
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10-02-2007, 06:26 PM
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My chapter still does candlelights for lavaliers, pins, and then engagements. The candle is a white taper candle with a white carnation and the colors of both Chi-O and the man's fraternity in ribbons tied around the base of the taper (if he's not Greek, just our colors are used). For alumnae, our group of sisters makes sure that when an alum sister gets engaged, she gets the candle she would have used for her candlelight. It's a pretty fun engagement gift to give, and I know it's a treasured one to receive!
ps--In response to the earlier posts (even though they are two+ years old)--pinning is still common on our campus, even though not as much as in the '60s. But I know many of my friend's moms who still wear their husband's pins, and a few who had them soldered onto their own pins. When I was an active, being pinned was quite an accomplishment--something that had almost been "earned"!
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10-02-2007, 07:28 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cutie_Hootie
ps--In response to the earlier posts (even though they are two+ years old)--pinning is still common on our campus, even though not as much as in the '60s. But I know many of my friend's moms who still wear their husband's pins, and a few who had them soldered onto their own pins. When I was an active, being pinned was quite an accomplishment--something that had almost been "earned"!
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I still have mine and my husband's soldered together and still wear them both.
I had to laugh at the OP's comment (he is now BigRedBeta). We lived across the street from the SigEps, and they had lots of pinnings back in the 1980's, too! (lots with us!)
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10-02-2007, 09:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SthrnZeta
I thought I'd resurrect this thread because I had a question: is it appropriate to do this if both people are alums or is pinning/lavliering/etc only done while in college? Also, does anyone know if Delta Tau Delta does this or is it just a chapter by chapter tradition?
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Let me guess...you graduated in '04 and you're now dating a Delta Tau Delta alumnus?
In my opinion, lavaliering and pinning is for while you are in college. No rule against it later in life, to be sure, but I see it as more of an undergrad tradition.
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10-02-2007, 09:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NutBrnHair
Let me guess...you graduated in '04 and you're now dating a Delta Tau Delta alumnus?
In my opinion, lavaliering and pinning is for while you are in college. No rule against it later in life, to be sure, but I see it as more of an undergrad tradition.
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I agree. While I absolutely would have loved to have a candle passing while I was in college, I would have felt very strange if my three-years-out-of-school ATO boyfriend (now husband) would have given me a lavaliere. And we definitely hadn't been dating long enough to talk engagement!
Now, I satisfy that urge by buying him cool antique ATO badges off eBay (of course, they're kept on my pin pillow next to my Kappa badges.  )
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10-02-2007, 10:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SthrnZeta
I thought I'd resurrect this thread because I had a question: is it appropriate to do this if both people are alums or is pinning/lavliering/etc only done while in college? Also, does anyone know if Delta Tau Delta does this or is it just a chapter by chapter tradition?
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I don't know if they still do it, but when I was in school, the Delts definitely pinned their almost-fiancees. My roomie & I got pinned the same weekend, but to men in different fraternities. We had one of the few double candlelights!
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10-02-2007, 10:38 PM
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On my campus, back in the day (the early 1980s), I recall hearing that the KAs (Kappa Alpha Order) did not ever give their pins to their girlfriends. Seems like I heard there was a jeweled pin that could be purchased by the member, but it was expensive.
Just wondering if this is true OR it was something the guys at Mercer made up!
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10-02-2007, 10:50 PM
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We had at least two pinnings at my chapter.
And I recalled them so very well that I pinned my girlfriend way after school.
And I ransomed my pin back  a bit later.
While it took awile, we are getting our ring this week from the goldsmith.
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10-02-2007, 10:57 PM
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My then-boyfriend's fraternity supposedly did not allow the badge to be given away. That was always his excuse for not pinning me. Then, his friend, the president of the house, decided he loved his GF soooooo much that he was going to pin her anyway, and he did it prior one of our formals so she wore it to the dance. It was very sweet--she was from my house so we did a candlepass for her. Did my boyfriend get an earful after that. But he stuck to his guns. He would not give it up. I did receive an amazing engagement ring several years later. But I still don't have the pin to this day, and I bore this man 2 gorgeous kids, ok? Oh, and the other couple? Still happily together with 3 kids.
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10-02-2007, 10:59 PM
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My husband gave me his pin at his Sweetheart's Formal. It was a big job keeping all the Gamma Phis who were there at that dance Sat night quiet until I could have a candle pass on Monday night at our house!
(it was a white taper candle lit with real FIRE surrounded by pink carnations.)
I did take a lot of stuff from his Sigma Chi brothers because I wore his pin at the same level as my own, over my heart. Would never have worn one pin above or below the other. And I never, ever, wore his letters.
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10-03-2007, 10:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ISUKappa
I agree. While I absolutely would have loved to have a candle passing while I was in college, I would have felt very strange if my three-years-out-of-school ATO boyfriend (now husband) would have given me a lavaliere. And we definitely hadn't been dating long enough to talk engagement!
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I agree, I think of it as an undergrad thing as well, just curious was all.
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10-03-2007, 01:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NutBrnHair
Let me guess...you graduated in '04 and you're now dating a Delta Tau Delta alumnus?
In my opinion, lavaliering and pinning is for while you are in college. No rule against it later in life, to be sure, but I see it as more of an undergrad tradition.
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Somewhere along the line, the story I heard was that a college man wouldn't be able to afford tuition, fraternity dues, AND an engagement ring - so pinnings became a popular symbol of commitment. Don't know how true that is, but it does make sense.
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10-03-2007, 02:25 PM
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The sweet heart pins as one posted are in many cases no longer made by the one jewler, just regular size Badges.
Laviliering or wearing of the letters show that this is a members girl friend and is under the protection of said fraternity. This I assume goes back to the day of heraldy and protecting a lady from brigands and usurpers!
Pinning as it was known has I think long paqst by the way side. One has to be very serious about the lady as Badges cost a lot of more money today than they did then! Along with the fact that many Fraternity members today do not even buy Badges or wear letters. How said that is!
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10-03-2007, 07:59 PM
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