Dealing with stress - Page 2

cashmoney · #16 09-07-2005, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lil' Hannah
Eh, I suppose. It still makes me tense and stresses me out.

Do you realize there is a treatment that will stop that from happening? I'm only asking because I know how bad it is to go through that crap. I used to put it off as stress until I was diagnosed for it and was informed of ways to stop it. Anxiety and Stress are 2 different things.

Lil' Hannah · #17 09-07-2005, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cashmoney
Do you realize there is a treatment that will stop that from happening? I'm only asking because I know how bad it is to go through that crap. I used to put it off as stress until I was diagnosed for it and was informed of ways to stop it. Anxiety and Stress are 2 different things.

Not to hijack AEPhi Alum's thread, but it's not a constant problem. There are just times when I have a lot going on at work, or I have a lot of things to remember, or something to that effect, and it helps to write it down. I don't think I'm an anxious person in general, I don't have anxiety attacks, or anything of that nature. I'm a fairly scatterbrained/unorganized person and so when I have more than a few things going on at once I need to write it all down or else it will be running through my head and I get tense about it.

cashmoney · #18 09-07-2005, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lil' Hannah
Not to hijack AEPhi Alum's thread, but it's not a constant problem. There are just times when I have a lot going on at work, or I have a lot of things to remember, or something to that effect, and it helps to write it down. I don't think I'm an anxious person in general, I don't have anxiety attacks, or anything of that nature. I'm a fairly scatterbrained/unorganized person and so when I have more than a few things going on at once I need to write it all down or else it will be running through my head and I get tense about it.

Thats what happened to me, I'd have like 8 different places I needed to go to after work and I'd get all stressed out when I didnt think I'd be able to get it done within the time frame I alotted for it. Another example would be if I needed to call 15 people back and if I didnt get to all of them by the end of the day I'd get stressed/pissed off. It was both good and bad. I'd always get my stuff done but in the process of doing it I was an asshole to everyone. Sometimes, though, it makes you wonder if being the dependable/go to guy is really worth the stress it can cause. I've always had the mentality of people are depending on me to come through whether it's been bitches, business needs, help, yay, support in every form, and yes-even constructive criticism.

Lindz928 · #19 09-07-2005, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lil' Hannah
I don't think I'm an anxious person in general, I don't have anxiety attacks, or anything of that nature.

I am DEFINATELY an anxious person! (I think I get it from my mom). I am not one of those people who can just sit back and let things work themselves out. I always feel like I have to FIX whatever is wrong right now. It causes some serious stress AND anxiety.

My anxiety reliever- crying.

If I am really bothered by something or upset about something, I just break down and cry for like 15 or 20 minutes. Then I call my best friend and cry to her for a few minutes. Then she talks to me about it, and I end up feeling a little better. I know it sounds rediculous, but sometimes just talking and crying REALLY do help ease some of the tension.

I also write (or type) in a journal. I was surprised at how much that really helps.

Ok, sorry for the hijack!

Aephi Alum... Maybe you would be able to handle that commute- and if you think you can and it would stress you out LESS, then try it for a little while. I personally could NEVER handle taking that long to get to and from work. Just sit and think about how much time that will really add on to your work day. In the end, most of the time you spend in this house that you love, you will be sleeping. I would make sure that's worth it before you make the final decision.

I agree with whoever suggested renting.... You might be able to find an inexpensive small place to stay at during the week and then go home on the weekend. It might make things just a tiny bit less stressful, and you can continue your house hunt.

Whatever you decide, I hope things work out well for you. And congratulations on the new job!!!! At least that is one less stress that you have.

aephi alum · #20 09-07-2005, 07:25 PM

Thanks for all the input.

I already know the commute would kill me long-term. It's 2+ hours each way on commuter rail and subway. I love my current house, but with 8+ hours at work and 4+ hours commuting, I'd never be able to appreciate my limited time at home.

Renting is an interesting idea, except for the small fact that my new job is in NYC, and we'd be better off financially buying a house closer to NYC rather than renting a place there (= $$$) and continuing to pay mortgage on our current house. Mortgage interest is tax deductible, rent is not. Plus, I'd miss my husband all week.

Anyway, we've expanded our search to an area a little farther north of NYC, and we have some promising leads. Maybe I can still have a nice-sized house without having a long commute or being po'.

Still having trouble with the stress, though. I can't leave my house without looking at that big ol' for-sale sign, and I still haven't seen a house I actually want to buy.

Peaches-n-Cream · #21 09-07-2005, 08:06 PM

AEPhiAlum, are you considering looking for a home in Westchester, NY or Fairfield County, CT? The commute isn't too far on the MetroNorth. I know real estate can be expensive in those areas, but you might get lucky. Good luck and take a deep breath!

sugar and spice · #22 09-07-2005, 08:17 PM

Things that relieve stress for me (and I am very very anxious person in general): running/hard workouts (walking doesn't cut it for me), going out with some of my friends who are always a blast to hang out with and just drinking/dancing

However, the number one stress reliever is way too obvious. DOING something about the problem. (Haha -- and you thought I was going to give you some awesome solution, didn't you?) The second I make a decision and take some active steps towards creating a workable solution, the tension dissipates. Of course, sometimes this can be something you can't control -- but sometimes when you're faced with a situation that's difficult, like buying a new house when nothing out there is nice, the stress can cause you to procrastinate and worry more. The more you get out there, the faster you're going to find a house that you love, and the faster you do that, the faster you can calm down a little.

That's all I got.

aephi alum · #23 09-07-2005, 08:29 PM

P-n-C, thanks for the good-luck wishes

- I PM'd you.

S&S, usually doing something about the problem helps me deal with the situation, but not this time. I stress before I go into a job interview, but once I'm in the room, I'm fine. I freaked out ten minutes before my wedding, but once I was walking down the aisle, I was calmer than anyone else in the room, including my husband and my mother. But for some reason it isn't working this time. I have to get my house ready to be shown, and that means a lot of work cleaning and getting rid of clutter, and for some reason, all that prep work isn't helping. It doesn't help that I haven't seen an appropriate house yet.

Off to take a long bath...

Rudey · #24 09-08-2005, 11:04 AM

Drugs

-Rudey

Lindz928 · #25 09-08-2005, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by aephi alum
Thanks for all the input.

I already know the commute would kill me long-term. It's 2+ hours each way on commuter rail and subway. I love my current house, but with 8+ hours at work and 4+ hours commuting, I'd never be able to appreciate my limited time at home.

Renting is an interesting idea, except for the small fact that my new job is in NYC, and we'd be better off financially buying a house closer to NYC rather than renting a place there (= $$$) and continuing to pay mortgage on our current house. Mortgage interest is tax deductible, rent is not. Plus, I'd miss my husband all week.

Wow. Knowing that it is New York does make a big difference. I've never even been there, but I have heard horror stories about the cost to live IN the city. Expanding your search area to different areas around the city is probably a good idea.

*GOOD LUCK!!*

adpiucf · #26 09-08-2005, 03:09 PM

So aside from drinking, drugs or exercise, what are some other good tips to deal with anxiety?

Lindz928 · #27 09-08-2005, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
So aside from drinking, drugs or exercise, what are some other good tips to deal with anxiety?

I stick by my "talk to someone about it" response. It does wonders for me.

One of my best guy friends knows that if I call him saying "I need advice" it really just means I need him to listen and tell me that I'm a good person.

Dionysus · #28 09-08-2005, 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by adpiucf
So aside from drinking, drugs or exercise, what are some other good tips to deal with anxiety?

Calcium and magnesium complex. It will knock your ass out though. I would only take it after work or school.

KunjaPrincess · #29 09-08-2005, 03:55 PM

AEPHI ALUM

Have you looked at Danbury CT? My dad used to commute to NYC from there and took a train directly to GRand Central Station. It didn't take him too long and used to work wierd hours so I think there are a few routes. Not sure what price range you are looking at though so Danbury may be expensive.

aephi alum · #30 09-08-2005, 04:24 PM

Danbury is a good idea, but the commute is still too long... 2 hours on Metro-North each way, plus time on the subway.

I think we're going to end up in Norwalk or Stamford, depending on how big a mortgage we want to take out.

Anyway, I'm feeling a bit less stressed now. I've been approaching this from the wrong perspective: "OMG I'm selling my home!" But my realtor put it in perspective: "Don't think of this house as your home any more. It is a house. It's an item that you want to sell." So I've begun mentally moving out, so to speak. It's tough, though, because we haven't seen anything acceptable to move into. :/