Unwanted...twice!!!

[GPhiLlama]

My advice is "Don't give up!" I know people who were released from formal recruitment (some twice), COBed, and ended up pledging the sorority they wanted.

[mmcat]

take it as a learning thing...
i totally agree with the earlier post regarding a nice short note indicating interest and whether cob exists. also base touching with the greek affairs folks to see if something is there you need to know.
then from your perspective, think about what you could improve on.
in life, you are going to see this stuff (ie rejection) and learning how to handle it now is a good thing.

HONESTLY, if you were "cut" before bid night/day, it was just a technicality (sp????). You probably got "cross cut." As far as I know for all sororities, if you are at their pref party, you are on their bid list. WHERE you fall on one of those two or three lists is a different story. That sucks and seems kind of rare that it would happen two years in a row, but that's the way it happens sometimes. Try again as a junior if you really want to be in a sorority. Sometimes it's easier as a junior bc you are in a different quota count. Just my thoughts!!

[smiley21]

Originally posted by ADPiZXalum
HONESTLY, if you were "cut" before bid night/day, it was just a technicality (sp????). You probably got "cross cut." As far as I know for all sororities, if you are at their pref party, you are on their bid list. WHERE you fall on one of those two or three lists is a different story. That sucks and seems kind of rare that it would happen two years in a row, but that's the way it happens sometimes. Try again as a junior if you really want to be in a sorority. Sometimes it's easier as a junior bc you are in a different quota count. Just my thoughts!!

i wonder if that was my situation. i was at the pref party for KD colonization. i am trying again in the spring. do i have a better chance or will i be starting the same way as everyone else?

[kateshort]

Originally posted by smiley21
i wonder if that was my situation. i was at the pref party for KD colonization. i am trying again in the spring. do i have a better chance or will i be starting the same way as everyone else?

Depends on your campus.

At some schools (or just with some top-level sororities), rushing as a junior has a certain stigma attached, and some groups won't accept any juniors or seniors. In others, juniors and seniors don't count as part of formal recruitment quota, just total-- so if a group is under total, they could possibly take you without having to switch out a junior for a freshman (who would hopefully be there for four years, gain more experience, and who is sometimes seen as more desirable).

If this is only KD's first or second formal recruitment on that campus, it could certainly help you that you've gone through their recruitment and gotten to know them. On the other hand, if this will be your third time going through, there may be some people who might think "why go through a third time?" and think that there must be some reason you weren't extended a bid yet, and thus be more likely to cut you if numbers are tight.

Without knowing you and knowing the sororities on your campus, it's hard to give advice. Sometimes people say "you'll end up where you were meant to be"-- but that means that sometimes you'll end up *not* getting a bid to join a sorority. It doesn't make someone any more or less of a person. It may be that god/fate/whatever has plans for you, whether it's getting a bid from KD, doing COB with some other organization, or not joining a sorority at all. It might not make sense now, but it'll all work out in the end.

I'm not saying this to discourage you! You *should* go after your dreams with all of your heart and soul, and follow through with your plans. Getting to pref is a huge step-- you don't get asked to pref if they wouldn't want you as a sister-- so that coupled with your determination will probably mean that more of the sisters will recognize you, and you may have more to talk about in the recruitment events.

Remember that you have people in your life who will support you no matter what choices you make and how things turn out.

*hug*

[Tom Earp]

SIU cannot be that large a campus.

Instead of emailing, why not get to know some of the Ladys of the Soroitys.
I am sure there are some in your classes or you see on campus events. They are not snobs, but just women going to college.

Just to reiterate, there may have been many reasons for not getting a bid:

The need of the Chapter for certain areas.
Grades.
Participation with school events.
Coming off as to shy.
Quotas are a very big thing in womens Organizations.

There may be a myrid of reasons that were beyond your control!

Just go with it and see what happens.

Explore all of your options and good luck in your quest

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally posted by Tom Earp
SIU cannot be that large a campus.

Actually many of the SIUs are large Division 1 schools.

And frankly, sorority women are hard to come by. I go to a small D1 school (11,000) and I've seen ONE Alpha Xi that i know of in this entire semester. I've only seen 3 or 4 Pi Phis, and this isn't in my classes - just in passing. I've only seen APhis when I've gone to visit a GDI friend who lives with them. I've seen Alpha Chi's EVERYWHERE which speaks volumes of their promotion. If I'm a Greek who knows to look for lavaliers, totes, flip-flops, etc, and I have a hard time finding them on my campus, it's very probable that you could on an SIU.

[AXWhoah]

WHOO HOO, go Alpha Chi Omega's! Way to PACE! So excited to hear that the ladies at Marquette are wearing their letters proudly and frequently.

[pirepresent]

Smiley, I just wanted to add that if you're re-rushing as an upperclassman, something that might be VERY important to a new colony is alumnae support. that support is just as important, if not MORE important in certain aspects, than the activities of the actual chapter.

you might try mentioning that, while you'll have less time as an active, you'd be an alumnae in a short time and would be available to support the new chapter. unless you'll no longer be in the area, in which case... i'm not sure.

just my two cents. good luck!!

[Tom Earp]

GeekyP, if memory searves me right, SUI is in Carbondale, Il. They are a separate Campus.

I drove by that campus on the way back from Tn. or Kt.

Got lost trying to take a short cut to KC!

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally posted by Tom Earp
GeekyP, if memory searves me right, SUI is in Carbondale, Il. They are a separate Campus.

I drove by that campus on the way back from Tn. or Kt.

Got lost trying to take a short cut to KC!

That's one of the SIUs - there's several. SIU - Carbondale and Edwardsville. BSUPhiSig'92 is an advisor at one of them, I think Carbondale.

[smiley21]

in january, i will be a junior credit wise, but i wont yet be admitted in the College of Education ( my major) until june.

anyways, with this being kd's first year, it will be my second time going through their recruitment.

as for delta gamma, this will be my fourth time. (two c.o.b's and one formal recruitment.) i havent gotten a bid yet because of my grades. they have been improving greatly each time that i have tried. i have some great dg's on my side encouraging me to go through cob.

so i am not too worried.

[raiderchic482]

Smiley , I'm pretty much in the same situation as you, working at my grades, and I'll be a junior too going through spring recruitment as well, for a third time... , good luck to you!

[ThetaPrincess24]

I dont mean to be a bitch here, but I dont want to blow smoke up anyones butt either..........on most campuses if you go through formal recruitment twice and still dont get a bid.............going through a third time will probably end up the same way, same for many many attempts at COB'ing. It sucks, and it hurts, but that's the reality for most people who do that, I've seen it happen on several campuses.

Colonization I cant really talk about because I dont know much about that not having attempted it as a PNM or having gone through it as a member or whatever/however they do it.

Ultimately do what you think is best for you, but keep in mind the great potential for let down if you choose to go through rush more than twice.

just my two cents.

[kddani]

Thetaprincess, you're not being a bitchy, you're being realistic and telling the reality. I wish more GCers would be realistic sometimes.....