The last straw - Page 2

chicagoagd · #16 09-23-2002, 06:01 PM

Try not to go on the offensive, just simply tell them how disappointed you were about not getting a little because you had all these things planned on what to do for her. There could be a simple explanation, where nothing was meant in a personal way.

One word of golden advice: Don't drop out of the sorority, it's bigger than your chapter, you will regret it in the end. Alum life is sooo much better, I promise.

Dionysus · #17 09-23-2002, 06:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by chicagoagd

One word of golden advice: Don't drop out of the sorority, it's bigger than your chapter, you will regret it in the end. Alum life is sooo much better, I promise.

Yes I learned.

This isn't a sorority it's a coed fraternity. I don't want to drop out completely. How do I become a alum? This organization has them too.

FuzzieAlum · #18 09-23-2002, 06:50 PM

Quote:

How do I become a alum?

You graduate!

Sorry, I had to say it. But some organizations do allow you go get alum status early for various reasons. However, not all groups allow it and every group has very different rules, so you'd be best off checking with an advisor or your HQ.

Dionysus · #19 09-23-2002, 06:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FuzzieAlum

You graduate!

Sorry, I had to say it. But some organizations do allow you go get alum status early for various reasons. However, not all groups allow it and every group has very different rules, so you'd be best off checking with an advisor or your HQ.

No no no I'm not a graduate, lol!
But, I heard that you can go alum when you're an undergraduate also.

Kevin · #20 09-23-2002, 07:26 PM

Have you communicated your issues to whoever's job it is to assign littles? When you leave people to simply assume what you think (as in not telling them) you leave them open to assuming the wrong thing. Their intentions could be completely above board and well-meaning. Speak to them on the issue before quitting.

AlphaSigLana · #21 09-23-2002, 10:55 PM

I'd be pissed if my house assigned littles/bigs. I think the new girls should pick their bigs. We also wait until a week before they are inititated before they pick a big so they have time to get to know all the girls.

MenaceKiller · #22 09-24-2002, 12:09 AM

We're the exact opposite -- we believe that it's absolutely critical that the new member gets a big ASAP, so that they have someone to guide them through their new member experience. We've lost several people when we delay the big brother process, or some part of the big/little process breaks down due to corruption within the process (selfishness, ego, miscommunication, etc.)

CarolinaCutie · #23 09-24-2002, 12:52 AM

I'm a new Phi Mu

and the first week, we had a Phi Pal, the next three weeks we will have Paw Pals (one a week), and THEN we get to pick our Carnation Sister. I think it is better that way because I have more opportunities to really get to know all of the girls in my chapter before I pick my Big.

justamom · #24 09-24-2002, 07:03 AM

Sweetie, you have been given excellent advice. Take the high road, find out WHY (if you can rely on an HONEST answer). Then, THINK about it before making any fast decisions. It could be any number of things. Still, if in your heart you believe you are getting screwed over, checking into alum status may be a good option. Just take your time and weigh the information carefully... then think some more.

honeybee77 · #25 09-24-2002, 11:12 AM

Quitting is not the answer. You should not turn your letters in for a problem over littles. If you have a problem with a specific person deal with it. Call a meeting of all sisters and get the issues in the open. IF it is your fault then write a formal letter saying your sorry. Nothing is worth losing your letters. In my sorority anyway.

If the problem is in the sorority you ALLl need to deal with it. Talk about it. If there problems with each other (specific sisters against specific sisters), they must learn to respect each other for the sake of the sorority.

It is all for the Sake of Your Sorority.

End the end isn't that the most important thing.

Milissa

Dionysus · #26 09-24-2002, 12:10 PM

I actually recieved that email from our pledge trainer. According to one person, only one person selects the littles. According to my president I do have one, but I think that person dropped. However that wasn't in her email, so I assumed that I wasn't assigned one.

I'm not quitting, but I definately will spend as much time on this organization any more, until things get better.

XiLovin · #27 09-24-2002, 12:40 PM

I just have a comment. Greek life is a part of my life. It is not all that my life consists of. If things got bad enough for me I would quit. Yes, I would try to resove things in a mature way but I don't feel like I HAVE to be in the sorority. Alpha Xi Delta has a very special meaning to me and if I ever felt that the principles that A Xi D stands for were being disregarded and I was focusing more on problems than those principles, you better believe that I am packing up my things. The good should outweigh the bad.

Dionysus · #28 09-25-2002, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by XiLovin
I just have a comment. Greek life is a part of my life. It is not all that my life consists of. If things got bad enough for me I would quit. Yes, I would try to resove things in a mature way but I don't feel like I HAVE to be in the sorority. Alpha Xi Delta has a very special meaning to me and if I ever felt that the principles that A Xi D stands for were being disregarded and I was focusing more on problems than those principles, you better believe that I am packing up my things. The good should outweigh the bad.

It's not just about bad things, I'm just losing interest. Lack of interest will make me leave or commit less to something more than anything. I want to start a brand new page AGAIN. Maybe NEVER touch a GLO w/ a 10 foot pole again. I don't have this kind of trouble in any of my non-greek organizations.

kristiAZD · #29 09-28-2002, 12:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MenaceKiller
We're the exact opposite -- we believe that it's absolutely critical that the new member gets a big ASAP, so that they have someone to guide them through their new member experience. We've lost several people when we delay the big brother process, or some part of the big/little process breaks down due to corruption within the process (selfishness, ego, miscommunication, etc.)

I know that not all Alpha Xi chapters do this, but my chapter has Rose sisters. The new members get a Rose sister (the new members are called Buds as in rosebuds) within the first two weeks of pledging. They're the sisters that help them through the first part of the process. Later on when they get to know every sister better they pick their big out of a list of sisters that are financially able to take a little that semester. It's nice, because then you get to have two families instead of one.

AlphaSigLana · #30 09-29-2002, 05:29 PM

The reason we don't give bigs right away is because we assign ruby sisters. These girls give our newbies a "baby" book about the house and guide them until they pick their bigs. Usually a ruby sis has preffed the girl they get. I think it is so important to pick a great big and that picking bigs for girls isn't cool--in my opinion.
I don't know if quitting is right unless your house is really going downhill.