Adopted?? - Page 2

PM_Mama00 · #16 01-18-2004, 08:39 PM

I know a few people who were adopted.

The two brothers I grew up with are a horribly sad story though. When the younger one was born, the mother was I think 16ish? Somewhere in that teen age. His brother was a year or two older. Well, the older brother was really rebellious and hated his adopted mother and he definately had reason to... she treated the younger one like gold but treated the older one like shit. It was sad one day when the younger one was telling me about it. They're from the same birth mother. He told me that the adopted mother didn't want to split them up, which is good, but it resulted in them bein split up in the end. My other childhood friends have seen the older one drive down the street sometimes. It's so sad.

Then you have another one that I know is adopted... the only thing is that SHE doesn't know. It pisses me off that she's 24 years old and her parents have never told her. She has said stuff like "I think I'm adopted", but she's grown to look like her adopted parents.

And I know another family where both sisters couldn't have children so they adopted. One sister adopted a beautiful girl and boy from Russia. The boy looks like the mother and the girl looks like the father! They're so adorable, and when they adopted them, the parents bought stuff from Russia so they can teach them about their heritage and know where they're from. The other sister also adopted from Russia, but I only saw the baby when she was a few months old and she was so cute. The sister with the boy and girl also were on the news when they came back from Russia and newspaper and it was really exciting to see them!

Mz Destiny · #17 01-18-2004, 08:54 PM

My best friend was adopted from birth. The funny is, I didn't find out until I was 25. We've known each other since we were like 5. My mom told me, and I was like, huh? She thought I knew. I asked him about it, and he thought I knew also. When it all boils down to it, it really doesn't matter. Adopted or not, he's still my bestest friend in the whole wide world! His family has given him a blessed and favored life. He talks occasionally of finding his birth mother, butI don't think he's going to do it.

AOIIalum · #18 01-18-2004, 09:31 PM

I was adopted soon after birth and can not remember not knowing that I'm adopted. I don't know who my birth parents are and have no plans to ever find out or meet them, unless such info is medically necessary to keep one of my own children alive.

astroAPhi · #19 01-18-2004, 11:24 PM

I'm the same AOII Alum. I've always known that I was adopted.

I was adopted at 6 days old (took a few extra days because I had a little cold!). When I was 18 I decided that I wanted to find my birth mother. Part of it was because I wanted to know where I came from, but I also really wanted to know my health history.

When I walked in, the case worker had a look of shock on her face. She later told me that it was because she had seen a picture of my biological mother in the file and that I looked EXACTLY like her.

I was a little surprised about a few things. I hadn't realized that she hadn't really known my father (I figured it was a boyfriend or something), and that now she had a daughter. She also had the same name as an aunt that I was very close to when I was younger. I wrote her a letter and sent her a picture, and she wrote me a quick note back a few months later. However, a few letters later, there's been no response. The last time I spoke to the case worker she made it sound like she had just told her daughter about me, and may not have taken it very well.

In any event, I'll admit to being a little bitter about being slighted. After 18 years of being told how special you are and being loved by two parents who obviously wanted you so very much, it hurts to have someone who you thought would care blow you off. But I understand that it probably has to do with her daughter, who she has a priority to. I'll probably forward her a graduation announcement through the adoption agency, and do the same with an engagement announcement and send a wedding invitation even though I don't expect her or my half-sister to show up. The choice is hers. I just think I should send an occasional update when a major life change occurs.

honeychile · #20 01-19-2004, 12:15 AM

It's hearing the stories of people who were adopted and found a loving home that make me more pro-life than ever!

When I was a senior in high school, my then-boyfriend was adopted. He had always known, and was content with it. However, while he was a freshman in college, his half-brother found him. They had the same name! And, the half-brother is famous in his line of work.

Anyhow, the h-b had found their mutual mother, who really wanted to meet my bf. He went through a horrible struggle with the decision, and honestly, I don't know what he decided to do. We broke up after about 3 months of drama. Part of him had always fantasized that his birth mother had been a starlet who couldn't afford to have a child at the time - then he found out that she had been a prostitute. He also referred to her as "the woman who had me" and his adopted mother as his mother.

I was only 16, so I'm sure I said some stupid foot in mouth things, but I do hope he found peace, whatever his decision.

PlymouthDZ · #21 01-19-2004, 01:10 AM

Approximately half of my family is adopted and I have a bunch of friends who are also.

I was able to be present when my counsin, who is 14 now, and my best friend met her birthmom and sisters. Her mother gave her up because her birthfather was killed in a car accident when her birthmom was about 6 months pregnant and her BM decided she wasn't able to care for 2 children. That was probably the most amazing experience I have ever been through in my entire life. The love that everyone felt was incredible.. indescribable. It was a simply amazing time.

I hope someday to adopt children.. as many as God will allow me to properly care for. I think the act of adoption is such a generous, loving and selfless act.

that's all.. I've shared my bit!!

carnation- you are an amazing person!!!

#22 01-19-2004, 02:56 AM

I am semi adopted. My mother is my mother but dad adopted me when i was 1 yr old. i never met my biological father ...he relinquished all rights when my parents divorced. WOuld iw ant to meet him? maybe but my father is my father and the funny thing is i look more like my dad then i do my biological father.

Hootie · #23 01-19-2004, 03:07 AM

MY PARENTS KNOW THIS FAMILY THAT HAD A HARD TIME HAVING CHILDREN SO THEY DECIDED TO START THE PROCESS OF ADOPTING! WELL RIGHT BEFORE THEY GOT THE NEWS THAT THEY COULD ADOPT A BABY THEY FOUND OUT SHE WAS PREGNANT! SO WHAT THEY ENDED UP DOING IS HAVING THEIR CHILD AND ADOPTING ANOTHER ONE AT THE SAME TIME! THE TWO BOYS WERE THE SAME AGE SO EVERYONE THOUGHT THEY WERE TWINS! THEY WERE EXCELLENT SCHOLARS AND VERY ATHLETIC! JUST BY LOOKING NO ONE COULD TELL WHICH ONE WAS ADOPTED! THEY GRADUATED FROM MY HIGH SCHOOL AND WENT ON TO IVY LEAGUE SCHOOLS!

PS: SORRY ABOUT THE CAPS! MY COMPUTER HAS A MIND OF ITS OWN!

breathesgelatin · #24 01-19-2004, 03:34 AM

Hootie, there is a really sweet girl at my school who has the same situation you are describing (adopted with a twin brother who is a biological child). She actually lives with my little sister. Even better, she's a Chi O!

DigitalAngel126 · #25 01-19-2004, 04:55 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
Then you have another one that I know is adopted... the only thing is that SHE doesn't know. It pisses me off that she's 24 years old and her parents have never told her. She has said stuff like "I think I'm adopted", but she's grown to look like her adopted parents.

Being adopted and looking it from that side of things, THIS IRKS ME OFF MORE THAN ANYTHING!!!! I mean, how rude!!! I alllllways knew, as soon as I was able to comprehend, that I was adopted...I would be LIVID

if my parents had waited until I was 18 to tell me. Not cool!

Jill1228 · #26 01-19-2004, 05:06 AM

My husband feels the same way. He was adopted at 5 months old (back in the day, they didn't "give out" newborns). He has no ill will. She was just a young girl (16) in a bad situation. She was sent to an unwed mothers home until she had her baby

Quote:

Originally posted by Shine
I was adopted when I was 5 days old. I've never met or contacted, and have no interest to meet or contact my natural parents.

carnation · #27 01-19-2004, 08:54 AM

Not telling a child he's adopted can have so many consequences. We know a woman who faked a pregnancy back in '82. She did a great job faking--hardly anyone knew and then she went on vacation and "delivered" the baby there.

After a few months, it became obvious that the baby wasn't all white. Now she had to decide what to do--reveal her ruse or let the whole world think she'd been running around on her husband. She decided not to tell the truth and for years, people wondered what on earth was going on. She finally gave up and told the son the truth when he was 13--by that point, he hardly looked white at all--and he absolutely went nuts. I don't think he ever got over it.

honeychile · #28 01-19-2004, 10:14 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ariesrising
Hootie, it's strange, but I have come across SO MANY similar stories! It's almost eerie how many adoptive parents find out they're expecting right around the same time as they adopt.

I wonder if there's some kind of biological reason for that?

[And as a total aside, I think that's what should happen on Friends with Monica and Chandler lol]

I'd heard that the adoptive couple conceives because of the lack of stress previously put on the result of the performance. I know at least three times it's happened.

And I've been thinking that's what's going to happen to Monica & Chandler, too, especially since Courtney Cox is pregnant!

cash78mere · #29 01-19-2004, 01:59 PM

my cousin, who just got a bid from Phi Mu today!, was adopted from korea when she was a baby.

her mother got pregnant immediately after adopting my cousin.

she is totally loved by everyone and doesn't really mention being adopted at all. i love her to death

Jill1228 · #30 01-19-2004, 03:25 PM

Yeah, my mother in law got pregnant 4 years after adopting my husband.

And you can definitely tell my husband is adopted. He had blonde hair and blue eyes and his brother has brown hair and brown eyes.

A former coworker of mine (White) adopted a multiracial newborn boy 3 years ago (mother was Filpina and White father was Black). The birth mom just turned 14. They were in the process of adopting again when she got pregnant. Brayden knows he is adopted and he is the cutest little boy!