Have You? Would You?

[Shelacious]

I have dated outside of my race. In fact, my very first "real" boyfriend was white. He presented me with a dozen roses in the 11th grade...how cute was that? After inital resistance, I gave in. My family knew he was totally into me, and welcomed him. MOST of his family totally welcomed me; his dad was lukewarm, but never disrespectful to me.

I last dated outside of my ethnicity in college (moons ago), but I certainly don't knock anyone who does do it--even though it DOES seem harder to deal with the smug brothers who date outside of their race because of some deep-seated hostility toward black women (but anyway...). There can be some differences to be sure, but it's all about trade-offs. I would rather have a secure white guy who loves and respects me and my ethnicity (because I don't believe in the concept of "color-blindness") than a black man who is self-loathing and doesn't respect me nor "our" progress as a people anyday of the week! I have met too many black folks who "can't relate" to what I'm going through to have the illusion that all black folks will be able to "relate" simply because the color of their skin is brown.

[DOVE1920]

Originally posted by lil_sunshine
My first boyfriend was Honduran. I thought he was African American when I first met him, but one day I heard him on the phone talking to his mother and he was speaking Spanish. I then asked him over the phone where his parents were from and he told me they were from Honduras. At that point, I knew that there were Spanish people who looked Black, but I never thought I'd date someone Spanish. It was an okay experience; he and I no longer talk b/c I found out he's not the best type of friend to have. Would I do it again? Maybe, just not in the near future. Oh well, you live and you learn....

FYI: There are more people of African descent in Latin America than in the North America....

[ClassyLady]

I have dated Dominican, Italian and Puerto Rican men. I did it and at the time, I enjoyed the experience .

My boyfriend now is African-American and I love him to death. So, I don't want to date anybody else, regardless of color. But, if things with him did not work out, I would continue to date quality men, regardless of race. But, I do not think that I could see myself married to or having children with someone who wasn't black. The black family isn't as strong as it used to be and I want to help contribute to making it as strong as it once was. I also want to be able to say that I raised intelligent, cultured, and conscious black children.

[SoTrue1920]

Originally posted by TRSimon
And I married him, too.


TRSimon

It must be a Vancouver thing, TR!

[lilZetagirl]

i never have, and i can't say that i will in the near future though i live in the LAND of interracial relationships...

there is SOMETHING about a black man that makes me weak in the knee's, i have an eternal weakness for black men, and as another soror said, the black family...

i don't knock others for their preference...just a matter of preference!

[skywalker20_99]

I had a so-called white boyfriend for about two weeks when I was in the ninth grade. I think it was mostly experimental, because we would make a conscious effort to watch people's reactions to seeing us together. I "kicked it" a few times with a guy who was part Philipino in college. He was a Sigma, and we had the same set of friends, so it didn't seem out of the ordinary by any means.

Other than that, I have dated African-American men, and they are the only men I have had serious relationships with. There is just something about a black man!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway though, I think that if someone (outside of your race)makes you happy, then go for it!!!