Barbie’s Honest to God Authentic Retro Recruitment at a Very Competitive SEC School

[Shellfish]

Go, Liddle Kiddles! A guy I know who went to William & Mary in the early to mid '90s said that the KDs all seemed to be short, which seems like a funny stereotype to have but one I'd fit right in with. Yay, short stuff.

[ForeverRoses]

I totally know what school this is! Go American Girls!

[drgnlady]

Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush

Midge, my best friend from high school, is rushing too. She is a super sweet girl but a little unfortunate in the looks and fashion sense departments. I certainly hope the houses do not cut dear sweet Midge!

Poor Midge, I don't think she'll have much luck with rush. She can't be much fun with that unfortunate stick up her bum!

[Barbie's_Rush]

Lunch is over and we're starting our afternoon of parties!

Madame Alexanders

This chapter is the tippy top of the top tier. They are all super model beautiful, have 4.0 GPAs, drive brand new Porsches, and do more philanthropy work than Mother Theresa did. Their outfits are perfectly coordinated. They are serving champagne mimosas and have loin cloth clad fraternity boys catering to our every need. They also keep us at their parties as long as they want to. Rush infractions? There’s no such thing as a rush infraction when you’re a Madame Alexander. Rumor has it that if they want you, they take you into the formal living room and if they don’t want you, they take you to the basement and you are never seen again. Needless to say, I am immediately led to the formal living room, because I am perfect. I am so ready to get this process all over with and accept my bid to Madame Alexander.

Jems

These girls are also top tier but are known to be the ones who couldn’t get into Madame Alexander. They are a little over the top with the flash and sparkle compared to the refined elegance and perfection of the MAs. They are wearing sequined pantyhose, which I think is a bit too much. There’s also this thing with the Jems. I don’t know how this thing will affect the way they feel about me.

Rainbow Brites

The only word I can use to describe the Rainbow Brites is awkward. They tried hard but the way they color coordinated their hair and outfits came off as a little creepy. The rainbow colored mascots were a nice touch though. They even had a pony that blew rainbows out of its butt.

Strawberry Shortcakes

With their rainbow striped outfits, matching hats, and presence of mascots at their party, it was obvious that the Strawberry Shortcakes were Rainbow Brite wanna-bes. I couldn’t understand why any chapter would want to copy such a bottom tier awkward house. This was a real turnoff and I couldn’t wait to leave.

Although it’s pointless for me to return to anyone except Madame Alexander, my Rho Chi tells me that I have to rank all the houses since there’s this pesky detail called “guaranteed placement.” Le sigh. So I rank them this way:

Madame Alexanders
American Girls
Jems
Transformers
Bratz
Liddle Kiddles
Rainbow Brites
Strawberry Shortcake
Cabbage Patch Kids

After recruitment we go to a party at the GI Joe fraternity house where my perfect boyfriend Ken is already president, even though he just rushed. All the guys tell me I am perfect for Madame Alexander and can’t wait to see me again at their first mixer next week.

[honeychile]

LOLZ!! I have to ask - does that "thing" about the Jems have anything to do with twins or sequined hose?

Go Madame Alexanders!!

[texas*princess]

Holy smokes!! Is that purple Jem girl on drugz or something? I know every house tries to be diverse, but purple is a little over the top!

[gee_ess]

I am trying to figure out what this thing is about the Jems but can't...please give me a hint!

BTW, good job, Barbie! We are rooting for you and hoping that you are keeping an open mind and maximizing your opportunities. (although I am secretly hoping the MA's love you like you love them. I suspect they already have your parking place saved. Your pink Barbie Ferrari will fit right in.)

[ASUADPi]

Barbie you are forgetting to tell us how your BFF Midge is doing!

Although it doesn't sound like you like them, I am personally rooting on Rainbow Brite because they are just awesome!!!!! LOL.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by drgnlady

Poor Midge, I don't think she'll have much luck with rush. She can't be much fun with that unfortunate stick up her bum!

My best friend in 6th grade had a Midge doll. She had a dented nipple. (Midge, not my best friend. Although she could have had a dented nipple. But we weren't that kind of best friends. I never heard anyone say anything about it but sometimes guys get so freaked out about stuff like that especially in small towns that don't have a decent mall so you never really know. So she could have had a dented nipple. I don't know.)

[twinkle555]

LOL hilarious thread!! I loved Jem when I was little so I'm cheering her and the Holograms on!

[SydneyK]

I went to this school, and I know what this thing is with the Jems.

You see, Barbie's boyfriend, Ken, was actually born Kendra. She lived life as a girl up through her freshman year in college. She was a Jem before realizing that she was really supposed to be a he, at which point she had reconstructive surgery (and, from what I hear, the doctors did a really bad job) and took up the name Ken. The Jems know the real story behind Barbie's boyfriend, and Barbie absolutely should be concerned with how their knowledge might affect their perception of her.

[angelove]

Best. Thread. Ever.

It was already in the top 5, but 33girl's post about the dented nipple bumped it to the top spot.


I hope all goes as planned for Barbie with the Mu Alphas!

[ihr]

I have never posted in one of these threads, but this one is the best. I have been collecting vintage Barbies for about 15 years. Here is a picture of Midge dressed in the Sorority Meeting outfit from 1962. She has been on my shelf in this outfit for at least 10 years. I even made her a tiny little pin. So if the Midge in this story doesn't make it, at least mine did. As you can see, she is standing next to Ken in his Fraternity Meeting outfit.

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by ihr

So if the Midge in this story doesn't make it, at least mine did. As you can see, she is standing next to Ken in his Fraternity Meeting outfit.

Holy crap.

Barbie is gonna be PISSED!

[gee_ess]

^^^ Love these dolls! But I am a little nervous for Ken's huge zipper...which brings me back to the post regarding Ken's questionable gender identity and a whole host of other comments that come to mind...