"You'll end up where you were meant to"... - Page 12

OtterXO · #1 12-13-2004, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by nongreekloser
I guess if it this holds true, then I'm right-I'm not good enough to be greek and I'm not meant to be. Therefore, I'm not in a sorority.

So what if I say you're right? Happy now? That's what you've been waiting for someone to say. Thanks, glad I could help...I hope you feel important now.

carnation · #2 01-29-2005, 11:15 AM

Here in the middle of second semester recruitment, I want to bring this thread up again! Any more views?

qteasied · #3 01-29-2005, 05:09 PM

I rushed last year during Spring Formal. I got CUT. At first I was upset, but now that I think about it I really wouldn't have fit in at all with any of the NPC's on my campus. I saw a flyer for a multicultural that's being established, and I went to the info meeting. Long story short, I spent a whole semester being a interest and doing all the fundraisers, meetings...and I'm glad I did. Alpha Phi Omega's starting up here too, and I'm also interested in it as well.

I'm where I need to be because I wanted to be involved in Greek Life, but wasn't really satisfied with the little my school has to offer. So I decided to look for something else.

CarolinaDG · #4 01-29-2005, 05:27 PM

I dunno... I think that it's sad to say that girls are going to be disappointed because where they were "meant to be" is in a sorority that's about to fold. I was thrilled when I got a bid into Delta Gamma (I'm talking, jumping up and down hugging my friends) and made the absolute most of it. I got active on campus, used it as a stepping stone to get to know other people in greek life, and ended up on several different "important" committees and as a member of exec. And yet, our chapter closed. And at the end of it, as sad as I was, I could look back and be thrilled that I still know that I pledged the chapter where I was "meant to be." Oh, and I personally think I'm one of those cute, active, personable girls that make great PNM's and later sorority members. Sure, noone wants to get into a sorority just to have it fold on them, and I'm not saying that, but I also wasn't comfortable with the "big" sororities on campus, even though I ended up having a lot of friends with girls in them. We had a rho chi once that told girls to go where they could imagine late nights in pajamas talking. I feel like that's the best advice ever. Even though I have friends in other sororities, those are the friends that I go to meetings with and out to 5 points with. The fond memories that I have with DG are the "boys suck" cakes after a bad break-up and the delirious nights when we put kool-aid in the shower heads. And there are some of you who are sitting there thinking how stupid that is... and that's my point. I'm not 100% sure that I could have had that somewhere else. And nothing, not even a chapter closing, can take that away.

LSUgrrl126 · #5 01-29-2005, 07:47 PM

At some schools, well at least at LSU, so many girls go through rush and end up without a home simply because they just fell through the cracks of the system. All of the chapters at LSU have rules stating that if they've cut you, they can never reconsider you for membership, guaranteeing that they'll never have a place on sorority row. Is this where these girls were meant to be?

I'm one of those girls. Many people told me that I'd end up where I was meant to be, so to me, it sounds like I was not destined to join a sorority. Just my $.02. I wish everyone would stop saying that...

kddani · #6 01-29-2005, 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by LSUgrrl126
At some schools, well at least at LSU, so many girls go through rush and end up without a home simply because they just fell through the cracks of the system. All of the chapters at LSU have rules stating that if they've cut you, they can never reconsider you for membership, guaranteeing that they'll never have a place on sorority row. Is this where these girls were meant to be?

I'm one of those girls. Many people told me that I'd end up where I was meant to be, so to me, it sounds like I was not destined to join a sorority. Just my $.02. I wish everyone would stop saying that...

i'm sure you're frustrated, but maybe you weren't meant to be in a sorority? it's not the end of the world, it's not going to totally utterly change your life forever. Find something else to do and enjoy it!

qteasied · #7 01-29-2005, 07:57 PM

I hate to say it, but Greek Life isn't for everybody, and not everybody is for Greek Life. When a door closes, a window opens. Girls who get cut will hopefully redirect their energy into something else, and maybe one day look back and realize that everything did work out the way it did for a reason...

ADPi Conniebama · #8 01-29-2005, 10:55 PM

I typed this whole long post saying what I believe about bids and making the best out of any rush situation but well, . . . nevermind. Life is too short be happy.

LSUgrrl126 · #9 01-30-2005, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by kddani
i'm sure you're frustrated, but maybe you weren't meant to be in a sorority? it's not the end of the world, it's not going to totally utterly change your life forever. Find something else to do and enjoy it!

Well, I know I probably came across whiny, but the gist of my post was that 100+ girls were left bidless this year and their chances are blown if they ever wanted to rush again. Yes, some girls weren't meant to be in a sorority but surely some girls were the perfect candidates who slipped through the cracks because they didn't really know anyone in the chapters?

alphaalpha · #10 01-30-2005, 03:52 AM

LSUGRRL

This maybe the stupidest idea in the world, and i have read meny posts as to why it might not happen, but why don't you try to find some of those girls who are in your position and try forming a local sorority. Again, i have read many posts as to why it is hard to bring a NPC sorority onto a campus like LSU, but that does not mean that you can not start a local. And maybe in a few years if enough women join your sorority then maybe you could join a NPC. Its just a thought and its what i would do if i were in your shoes. I really think that cut once cut always policy is stupid especially if there is such a high number of PNM comming through rush and with what i have read how many and easily it is to fall through the cracks. i know it is lots of work, but i am sure that there would be many women who would

1) help you out on here (GC) with advise, and
2) there would be alum who could help you. I mean out of those 100 plus girls there has to be some who have relatives who were in sororities that can offer advise and assistance as advisors in some capasidy (SP) or another.

Anyway, i can understand how disappointed you can be. I had to transfer to another school because i was so disappointed, not cause of greek life but cause of other stuff, in the university. I think that the best way to handle the situation is take an action and if it were me i would try to start a local. i bet that there are lots of women who would want to be part of a sorority, espcially with the cut once, cut always policy.

Good luck, with whatever you choose.

debbie

kddani · #11 01-30-2005, 08:02 AM

great post alphalpha!

LSU rush is very well known for being competitive, this is no great secret. So you knew what you were getting into ahead of time. There is never a guarantee that you'll get a bid anywhere.

You've said that none of the 300+ other orgs on campus interest you? I think you're wearing blinders. Even if you had gotten a bid, most houses would require you to be involved in at least one other extracirricular activity. I can at least speak for KD in saying that this is a requirement. Heck, who knows, maybe this was a reason you got cut was because you had no other activities and no hobbies or interests? Those sort of things are definitely things that can be factors. A sorority wants a girl who brings something to a house. There were 900+ "nice" perfectly lovely girls that went through. Most of them probably had something to bring to the group besides being nice!

Find something else to do with your life. I don't meant to seem harsh, but you've been continually whining about how it's not fair and there's only so much patience in me. Life's not fair. Lose the woe is me attitude and get off your behind and do something about it. You DID have a chance, and i'm sorry that maybe you didn't make the best impression, but all those other girls were in the same boat. They made the best of it. You should've too.

If there is absolutely nothing out there that interests you (do you have no hobbies?), then I feel sorry for you. If there is something that interests you, and there's not a group, get off of your ass and start a group. At my school you just needed 10 people and an advisor, fill out a form, and you're good to go.

MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE!

cash78mere · #12 01-30-2005, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by LSUgrrl126
All of the chapters at LSU have rules stating that if they've cut you, they can never reconsider you for membership, guaranteeing that they'll never have a place on sorority row. Is this where these girls were meant to be?

do you know this to be a fact? or is this one of those rumors that tends to be spread to "explain" why some women go bidless?

i've never heard of such a thing.

carnation · #13 01-30-2005, 12:45 PM

I don't understand this about the rules saying that sororities can't bid someone they've cut before. One of my daughters pledged a sorority that had cut her the year before. I know of several similar situations.

It wouldn't make sense to have such a hard and fast rule! First, you'd have to keep track of several girls and what would you do if you realized you'd bid a girl you'd cut the year before? Drop her? I don't think so.

Also, I know of many girls who didn't get a bid at ABC University, transferred, then had their choice of sororities at DEF University--all chapters that had cut them. There's certainly no way that sororities could track girls from college to college, making sure that they didn't get bid by a group who'd formerly cut them.

Finally--people change. There are PNMs who get overlooked the first time they rush and they become strong leaders or get to know a lot of sorority members during their freshman year. The next year, the sororities are like, "We want her! How could we have overlooked her last year?"

FSUZeta · #14 01-30-2005, 01:45 PM

i am not familiar with this rule either. perhaps it is a school thing? anyway, lsugirl, alphalpha gave you awesome advice. start a local. or if you simply feel you will be incomplete unless you are a member of an npc sorority, transfer schools and choose a school with a less competitive recruitment. as kddani pointed out, you need to get out an circulate-join an organization. i do not believe that with over 300 organizations to choose from, you can't find one that interests you.

ADPi Conniebama · #15 01-30-2005, 02:35 PM

I always hear that people are upset cause they got cut from EVERY sorority . . . I also find that hard to believe . . . I mean yes I am sure that there is some random girl out there who actually may have gotten cut from EVERY sorority but MOST of the time they mean that they got cut from what they considered to be the best sororities.

Well, Wahh! In reality you cut sororities and its not them cutting you. Quota is set to give the most girls a bid . . .its not set to cut girls from the greek system. And when you hear that some rush went by and 40 out of 200 girls didnt get a bid check to see if any of the sororities didnt make quota and then you will see who is cutting who.

Don't get me wrong pnm's have the total right to WANT WHAT THEY WANT but I find it difficult to feel sorry for them because they didnt get a bid from "abc" when "abc" has total and quota and they are devistated or sour graped by the greek system.

Sorry I must be in a mood today but I just had to give my spill.

(also and this is to anyone who is worried about who will give them a bid. . . the truth is there are "good" and "bad" chapters of EVERY national sorority but when I graduated I became a member of something bigger then just my chapter and I didnt know it until I got involved as an alumnae . . . I know it is hard to get as a 17-19 year old, but every organization is what you make out of it)