Controversial Poem Puts 7-Year-Old On Hot Seat

[mulattogyrl]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
In all seriousness, it is very apparent that even a discussion of race has now been deemed "racist". To even mention historical events/times are now considered being "racist". Am I the only person that is confused my this thought process of some posters?

No, you're not the only one. I'm still tyring to figure it all out.

[mulattogyrl]

Originally posted by sensa_diva
I hear ya on age appropriateness but I would like to share a story about myself...

At the age of 5 I wish I was a white girl...I use to take my mother's white slips and tie it around my head. I would swear that I am a blonde white girl!!! My dad would tell me I am "black" and I would cry and say I AM BROWN!!! I would take the black crayon and the brown crayon to him and prove my point...It was at that point he set the record straight...SOOO

Good point. My daughter is 7 and always says she wants yellow hair and that her hair is 'different' from her friends' hair. It's an issue that's starts earlier than we may think.

[RedVelvet]

Originally posted by Rain Man
So what if there is still racism? Are you going to continue to complain and whine about it, or are you going to make the best out of a less than favorable situation?

Clint Eastwood in "Heartbreak Ridge" said it best:

"You adapt, you improvise, you overcome."

I am fully aware that there is racism. But I don't worry about that fact one bit because I am too busy making small victories for myself and others to get caught up in being a victim.

Stop complaining about what's wrong and just work on and for what's right and you too won't have time to be concerned about racism.

Why do you consider speaking up about injustice whining? As an educated, successful Black woman, I have to use the status that my success has afforded me to speak on behalf of those who do not have a voice or access to power. I don't know how you operate, but I can "work on what's right" and not only be concerned about racism, but actually doing something about racism.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

Originally posted by mulattogyrl
Good point. My daughter is 7 and always says she wants yellow hair and that her hair is 'different' from her friends' hair. It's an issue that's starts earlier than we may think.

My daughter started asking those questions at age 3. She is 4 now and I make sure to instill in her an appreciation for her beauty. Most of the books I read to her have African- American illustrations. For instance she has a Goldilocks book where the little girl has braids with gold beads on them (very creative twist on a classic). In my frequent reminders of not to let "them" play in her hair, I tell her that her brown curly hair and deep brown eyes are beautiful (who wants yellow hair anyway?). So I am hoping that she won't have those image issues in the future (have to start them early).

There is so much I want to say about this thread, but I don't think that I could do so more thoroughly and eloquently than Jubilance has. She is right on point.

[teena]

Originally posted by SKEEphistAKAte
My daughter started asking those questions at age 3. She is 4 now and I make sure to instill in her an appreciation for her beauty. Most of the books I read to her have African- American illustrations. For instance she has a Goldilocks book where the little girl has braids with gold beads on them (very creative twist on a classic). In my frequent reminders of not to let "them" play in her hair, I tell her that her brown curly hair and deep brown eyes are beautiful (who wants yellow hair anyway?). So I am hoping that she won't have those image issues in the future (have to start them early).

Good point. My daughter is 7 and always says she wants yellow hair and that her hair is 'different' from her friends' hair. It's an issue that's starts earlier than we may think

My question is for SKEEphistAKAte and mulattogyrl. Both of your girls are still young. Would you go into graphic, detailed discussion on the Middle Passage, right now? Would you tell them, right now, about slave auctions and the rape of the women? After you tell them that, mention that racism still exists?

That's my issue.

[RedVelvet]

Originally posted by teena
At seven, prodigy or not, her poem is regurgitation of viewpoints expressed to her by her parents. My thing is, at seven why is she being shoved into adulthood and dealing with full on adult issues.

Don't be so sure teena. I have a "gifted" child . At eight, my daughter wrote a letter to the editor about U. S. involvement in Afghanistan and had some choice words for the President. She composed and typed the letter on our home computer. She then sent it to our local paper. I found out about it when they called me to ask if the letter should be published. Gifted children have minds of their own and the ability to express what they are thinking. They really do think about things that are considered adult issues.

[UrbanizdSkillz]

Originally posted by RedVelvet
Don't be so sure teena. I have a "gifted" child . At eight, my daughter wrote a letter to the editor about U. S. involvement in Afghanistan and had some choice words for the President. She composed and typed the letter on our home computer. She then sent it to our local paper. I found out about it when they called me to ask if the letter should be published. Gifted children have minds of their own and the ability to express what they are thinking. They really do think about things that are considered adult issues.

I agree with you on the bolded. One of the things I despise most, and this is solely because of my own personal experience, is for someone to assume that a child's views and feelings are merely a regurgitation of their parents. Don't ever underestimate the brilliance of a child!

ETA: As far back as I can remember, my mother ALWAYS told me the truth about the world and she certainly was not (and still isn't) the type to sugarcoat an issue. Why do we want to shy away from these issues while a child is still young and then suddenly want to bombard them with all the issues as they face them head on? So no, I have NO issue with the fact that her parents have graphically taught her about her history.

[teena]

Originally posted by RedVelvet
Don't be so sure teena. I have a "gifted" child . At eight, my daughter wrote a letter to the editor about U. S. involvement in Afghanistan and had some choice words for the President. She composed and typed the letter on our home computer. She then sent it to our local paper. I found out about it when they called me to ask if the letter should be published. Gifted children have minds of their own and the ability to express what they are thinking. They really do think about things that are considered adult issues.

OK. THIS^^^ is why dialogue is soooo important. The young gifted children that I have come across cant operate at that level.
I would have NEVER guessed that.

[FeeFee]

Originally posted by RedVelvet
Don't be so sure teena. I have a "gifted" child . At eight, my daughter wrote a letter to the editor about U. S. involvement in Afghanistan and had some choice words for the President. She composed and typed the letter on our home computer. She then sent it to our local paper. I found out about it when they called me to ask if the letter should be published. Gifted children have minds of their own and the ability to express what they are thinking. They really do think about things that are considered adult issues.

Exactly @ gifted children. Never underestimate the capabilities of a child's mind.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

Originally posted by teena
My question is for SKEEphistAKAte and mulattogyrl. Both of your girls are still young. Would you go into graphic, detailed discussion on the Middle Passage, right now? Would you tell them, right now, about slave auctions and the rape of the women? After you tell them that, mention that racism still exists?

That's my issue.

I definitely PLAN to teach my daughter about all of those things. She is 4 and I don't think that she would fully grasp it right now. However, if something ever came up that would allow me to introduce it to her (teachers call that "teachable moments") I would do so and explain things in a simplified manner. It is kind of like the birds and the bees. Small kids ask "where do babies come from" at a really young age. When they do, you give them simplified answers that they can understand and as they get older you can go into more detail. That is how I will approach racial issues.

We've already done some though, because she came home last month and asked "mommy, when is black history month?" They'd done some stuff on MLK at school. So, I gave her the 4 year old version of MLK and the civil rights struggle at that time. You know, in plain language and using scenarios that she would understand. For instance, she has a little white girl at school that she is good friends with and I said that not so long ago her and the little girl wouldn't have been able to be friends or go to school and play together and I went on from there.

So, I don't think that it is something that you should shield your kids from at any age. I feel like you just have to explain it to them in terms that they understand. I also think that it is important to get to them before the school system does. So when she goes to elementary school she will know the REAL history and be able to tell truth from lies as this 7 year old girl did. But, yeah I could see us having a conversation about slavery and slave auctions right now. But it wouldn't be really graphic, I wouldn't sit her down to watch Amistad or anything like that. Right now I think is the time to lay the foundation, the more gruesome facts will come when I think she is ready.

[OhioCentaur]

My little brother had a gifted kid in his class and what used to amaze me about him is teachers would invite him to lunch in the teachers lounge and talk politics....

so i fully agree that gifted children have their own opinions and free will.

What is killing me is yall are trying to give her a scholarship... she's going to any school nationwide on a full ride!!! I'll donate on the pony though.

[CrimsonTide4]

Originally posted by SKEEphistAKAte
We've already done some though, because she came home last month and asked "mommy, when is black history month?" They'd done some stuff on MLK at school. So, I gave her the 4 year old version of MLK and the civil rights struggle at that time. You know, in plain language and using scenarios that she would understand. For instance, she has a little white girl at school that she is good friends with and I said that not so long ago her and the little girl wouldn't have been able to be friends or go to school and play together and I went on from there.

Have you and your daughter seen the Black History Month episode of The Proud Family? Not sure if you watch it, but that was one of the sub storylines -- in 1955, Penny and Zoe would not have been able to be friends because Penny is Black and Zoe is White.

Also wanted to point out that Autum is being raised by her father.

[SKEEphistAKAte]

^^ Yes. I've seen that episode but I don't think my daughter has.
It was a really cute episode. Like, I would be able to show that to her, but not a more gruesome adult movie like Amistad.

I also wanted to add, to Teena:

When dealing with children, you cannot go on age alone. You have to consider the MATURITY of the child. A child age 7 can be more mature and able to handle more than a 13 year old. So, don't get caught up with age or intelligence even. It is about maturity.

[Boom_Quack13]

Originally posted by teena


I dont think the poem is racist. I am very uncomfortable with the little girl's poem for a somewhat different reason. I am a parent. At seven, prodigy or not, her poem is regurgitation of viewpoints expressed to her by her parents. My thing is, at seven why is she being shoved into adulthood and dealing with full on adult issues. This is not the age where is black children speak out of line or dont know their place, they could get killed, like it was back during slavery. It is not a matter of safety for her to be aware of racial issues. I think to some degree her parents are doing her a disservice by no allowing her to fully enjoy her childhood.

I dont agree with Rain Man's view point of pull yourself up by your bootstraps and dont worry about it. But I respect his right to feel that way. AA are the only race that are not allowed to discuss the current ramifications of past injustices without being accused of pulling the 'race card'. No other race has a 'race card'.

Just my 2 cents.....

Are you implying that children have to be ignorant of their surrounding, their history, and the paradigm of society in order to enjoy her childhood? If so, I disagree. She is home-schooled. Those children tend to be more advanced, because they have one on one attention, as they learn. They are able to learn at their own pace, which allows them to ask more questions than the child who sits in a class with 25+ other children. We do not know that she is simply regurgitating her parents' beliefs. She may be espousing her own beliefs, based on what she knows about history.

If she is like the home-schooled children that I know, of all races, then she is probably enjoying her childhood more than the children sitting in class all day. Home-schooled children receive a couple of hours of instruction per day, and they go on tons of field trips and other activities with other home-schooled children. They also have networks, where they may receive instruction from other parents, who home-school, who are experts in a given field.

These children have play dates, field trips, proms, dances, and vacations together. They are exposed to more fun and bliss than most of the children who sit in classrooms all day. I'm sure this young lady is having the time of her life. Her childhood is more than likely ideal.

[DSTinguished1]

^^^Exactly! Cause its some adults who act worse than children.