i think spending the summer there is a good start. you will get to know the area and his family better and be able to make an informed decision.
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Originally posted by AlphaFrog
And yes, mommy wants him home-in February...and he told her no and he's waiting till May, which is huge because for one he's very close to his family, and two in Mexico you are taught to respect your elders and especially parents wishes, no matter how old you are.
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this is exactly like my ex's family. the thing is that they will not change. they will expect that you have the same level of respect, too. i don't think you would be disrespectful on purpose, but certainly you may find that the level of respect is different. with my ex's mom, she expected to decorate his house. she would choose the things on the walls, the color of the bathroom, where the pots went in the cupboards, etc. this made me nutty. i was like, it will be my house and if i want a pink bathroom with a pink fuzzy toilet seat cover then i can have one. he said, nope, my mom doesn't like those and she would never pick pink. my mom will certainly throw in her two cents, but i really don't have to listen. in his family, his mom rules! oh, and then there was the added bonus of his mom living with us. not because she was sick, or dying or bc her house burned down.....because she is expected to live with her eldest son. end of story. and i won't even get into the whole idea that the wife should serve her husband....
it is a lot easier for us to change because we are still young and flexible....for his mom, she will probably be steadfast in her opinions and may even make your life a living hell. i really thought that i could handle his family provided that they lived far away. honestly, i always knew that i couldn't be happy with them in our lives. as someone else said, unfortunately, the family really does make a difference.
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