much respect...
i love my brothers *in the strictly platonic way* but i am so glad that i am not str8 after reading some of these replies by the so-called educated black men on this board.
gentlemen...how could you not want to be chivalrous(sp?) to black women? it is true that there are some women that just don't like it. but there are plenty of women out there that want it...but are afraid to ask for it because then a brotha will start looking at her as weak.
alot of this seperation between black men and women harkens back to the saying that "black women raise their daughters and love their sons". so if a black woman does not seem interested in you opening doors, pulling out chairs, paying for dinner etc. that doesn't make her uppity. she has probably had to do that kinda ish for herself for a long time before you came along.
and what happened to communication. how about sitting down with a woman and asking her what does she prefer? does she like "going dutch" for the most part? does she like her chair pulled out/doors opened? when the two of you talk you might find out that she will be shocked that you even thought ahead enough to discuss it with her.
on the other hand...its understandable that men are feeling the sting of the backlash of the feminist movement. women on one hand want "equality" on the other hand want to be catered to. men are left wondering how can they do both and live & work in the same society? i suggest ladies and gentlemen that you read..."When Chickenheads Come Home to Roost" by Joan Morgan (known also as Joan Morgan-Murray executive editor *i believe* of Essence Magazine) she discusses this issue at length.
is chivalry dead? i hope not. its something that i think all women would like to have...whether they know how to ask for it or not. and frankly it doesn't take too much for a man to open the car door for his woman, hold the umbrella over her head when its raining, pull her chair out so she can sit down at dinner, point out broken glass or a crack in the cement so she can avoid stepping on it or tripping over it. its the little things fellas that make women swoon.
just a few thoughts
peace
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