My AI search!!

[JennRN]

For real, thats what I feel like. Let me explain: I have gotten 2 invites to 2 events this week from the alum chapter of Group 1-and each time I've had to email the president back and say, sorry I can't come( both events are on a day when I have a 12 hour shift at the hospital 7A-7P)-she was really cool about both, but I feel bad. Then, I got a call from the pres of the alum chapter of my Group 2 inviting me to their next event. I was really excited because I thought it was tomorrow night, but when I called her back, I realized I had gotten mixed up, and it's Sept 17th-so I also had to tell her I can't come (I'll be on my honeymoon out of the country). Of course she was so sweet and understanding about it, and asked me to call her when I get back in town so I can come to their October event. I know both times, each pres was really understanding and I can't exactly change what I have going on both times,but I feel like I'm being a slacker half-ass PNAM!! I feel disappointed in myself, because usually when I set a goal for myself, I do eveything possible to achieve it-and I hate telling people no. I'm scared that both groups will be like-you came to us and wanted this, and now you never come to any events we invite you to. I usually try to fulfill every commitment in my life-and I am commited to becoming an AI-and I hate that I have to keep turning things down!!

I just had to vent, I'm really disapppointed about having to tell everyone no. I don't want them to think I'm not interested/not serious about this/ not committed enough etc!!!