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There's no way she would have been dropped just for missing part of a party. There could be two things going on:
1) The chapter had more legacies than places. That does happen at some schools. Obviously, they can't all get bids.
2) There's some *real* reason the chapter cut her. I don't know what org we're talking about, but most nationals do not like it when you cut a legacy, especially someone with that much family history and a record of giving. Generally, they make the chapter justify it, and it can't be, "She just didn't fit." For example, AXD policy states, "A legacy may be released during recruitment only with the permission of the chapter's Area Facilitator."
Furthermore, many sorority's rules forbid cutting a legacy until after a certain party. Whether that's "stringing along" or not is moot, because her very involved relatives would have known that policy and would have realized being invited to second or third party many not mean they want her, and they should tell her that. (That rule may be waived in case of bad grades, I'm not sure.)
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