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01-05-2019, 07:25 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Sweet Home Indiana
Posts: 2,090
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ForeverRoses
Also, can I just say how much I HATE philanthropy crafts? I have 1000+ stress balls with uplifting messages on them that I would like to throw at whomever came up with this idea...
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Oh my, where does one store 1000+ stress balls during recruitment?
I don't think a craft is the answer. I understand wanting the PNMs to do more than watch another video or listen to someone talk about a philanthropy, but some of the philanthropies don't really translate easily into a craft.
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01-05-2019, 07:51 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 15
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Nervous Mom
So I have a daughter going through IU rush for the first time as a sophomore. She has a 4.0, is involved on campus, and only got asked back to 9 chapters for second round. I know being a sophomore has its drawbacks, but I'm really, really surprised she didn't get asked back to more. She had a wide range of chapters she listed in her 16. I just feel horrible for her. She feels like there is a specific "look" that she doesn't have. Okay, I'm her mom, so I'm biased, but I think she's beautiful. She felt like the conversations went really well at the chapters she listed. She was really surprised by some of the ones that cut her. And now she's nervous for next weekend. She feels like if she gets attached to a chapter, they'll "just cut me" anyway. Ugh! I don't know how to even comfort her. And I can't really say don't worry, I'm sure you'll be asked back to XYZ next round, because, who knows! She could theoretically be cut from all of them. This is going to be such a long week of classes.
Thanks for letting me vent.
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01-05-2019, 09:12 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IUMomof2
So I have a daughter going through IU rush for the first time as a sophomore. She has a 4.0, is involved on campus, and only got asked back to 9 chapters for second round. I know being a sophomore has its drawbacks, but I'm really, really surprised she didn't get asked back to more. She had a wide range of chapters she listed in her 16. I just feel horrible for her. She feels like there is a specific "look" that she doesn't have. Okay, I'm her mom, so I'm biased, but I think she's beautiful. She felt like the conversations went really well at the chapters she listed. She was really surprised by some of the ones that cut her. And now she's nervous for next weekend. She feels like if she gets attached to a chapter, they'll "just cut me" anyway. Ugh! I don't know how to even comfort her. And I can't really say don't worry, I'm sure you'll be asked back to XYZ next round, because, who knows! She could theoretically be cut from all of them. This is going to be such a long week of classes.
Thanks for letting me vent.
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I am thankfully on the other side this year. It is hard being on the other side of the phone calls. I've had 2 girls go through IU rush now, 1 in 2012, 1 last year. Both were equally stressful. Last year a little more because the youngest was dropped right before pref by her legacy house. BUT she is happy where she landed. I do know my oldest daughters "baby/little" was a sophomore and they are still very close. She is 2nd year in Med school states away and 1 of the few sisters she keeps in contact with. There's nothing you can do but listen and try to keep her positive because honestly 9 isn't a bad number it's on the higher end of average. 16 or a full card is the exception not the norm. Sending positive vibes your way!!
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01-06-2019, 08:06 PM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Crescent City
Posts: 10,072
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Quote:
Originally Posted by USCofSEC
...Only 2 for preference round. Can get up to 3. Reality is 1 or 2.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GreekOne
You say "only 2 for pref" but they can "get up to 3". How does that work? Can you explain in more detail? Will they get 3 invites and have to select 2? Or could someone attend 3? Was there really a switch back to 3 preference parties or not?
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The way I'm reading this is that a PNM might be invited to, and attend, 3 pref parties, but it's more realistic to expect only 1 or 2 pref invites. (Of course, there is always the possibility of not being invited to any pref parties.)
__________________
AEΦ ... Multa Corda, Una Causa ... Celebrating Over 100 Years of Sisterhood
Have no place I can be since I found Serenity, but you can't take the sky from me...
Only those who risk going too far, find out how far they can go.
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01-06-2019, 11:09 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 31
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aephi alum
The way I'm reading this is that a PNM might be invited to, and attend, 3 pref parties, but it's more realistic to expect only 1 or 2 pref invites. (Of course, there is always the possibility of not being invited to any pref parties.)
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Yes, Thank you Aephi Alum for grasping the situation.
I can say the ladies on the other side are exhausted and sleep deprived to! Hang in their PNM Mom's. For some, the next round Friday, will be harder then this weekend. Know we are hear for you! We will get through this together as IU Mom's!
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01-06-2019, 04:54 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 272
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IUMomof2
So I have a daughter going through IU rush for the first time as a sophomore. She has a 4.0, is involved on campus, and only got asked back to 9 chapters for second round. I know being a sophomore has its drawbacks, but I'm really, really surprised she didn't get asked back to more. She had a wide range of chapters she listed in her 16. I just feel horrible for her. She feels like there is a specific "look" that she doesn't have. Okay, I'm her mom, so I'm biased, but I think she's beautiful. She felt like the conversations went really well at the chapters she listed. She was really surprised by some of the ones that cut her. And now she's nervous for next weekend. She feels like if she gets attached to a chapter, they'll "just cut me" anyway. Ugh! I don't know how to even comfort her. And I can't really say don't worry, I'm sure you'll be asked back to XYZ next round, because, who knows! She could theoretically be cut from all of them. This is going to be such a long week of classes.
Thanks for letting me vent.
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Of course she is disappointed when she was hoping for a full schedule, and you disappointed for her because it is hard for us to see our kids hurting. But, as has been said, 9 is not a terrible number. There are many girls with fewer invites and she only needs one in the end. Just be supportive and offer her a place to safely vent.
Remind her to not worry about her "look". Some chapters may be interested in girls that are higher maintenance, but she wouldn't want to land there anyway. My 3 daughters, who all went through this process, are more natural beauties. None get spray tans, wear false eyelashes or heavy make up, etc. They wouldn't be happy in a chapter where there was pressure to be fully made up before heading to breakfast. If your daughter is the same, just remind her to be herself. If she is more into getting dolled up, she might not be comfortable in a house where she felt everyone was too casual. There is nothing wrong with that. She shouldn't have to change her look to be accepted.
If she is her authentic self, she will find a group of women with whom she shares similar values. Every house is not the right fit for every pnm.
With a 4.0, she is likely a smart young lady. She just needs to be patient and stay positive. Good luck!
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01-05-2019, 07:55 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: right here
Posts: 2,060
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IndianaSigKap
Oh my, where does one store 1000+ stress balls during recruitment?
I don't think a craft is the answer. I understand wanting the PNMs to do more than watch another video or listen to someone talk about a philanthropy, but some of the philanthropies don't really translate easily into a craft.
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or not a craft you can do in 20 minutes while having a meaningful conversation!
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So I enter that I may grow in knowledge, wisdom and love.
So I depart that I may now better serve my fellow man, my country & God.
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01-06-2019, 08:02 PM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Crescent City
Posts: 10,072
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IndianaSigKap
Oh my, where does one store 1000+ stress balls during recruitment?
I don't think a craft is the answer. I understand wanting the PNMs to do more than watch another video or listen to someone talk about a philanthropy, but some of the philanthropies don't really translate easily into a craft.
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I can imagine the sisters USING 1000+ stress balls during recruitment...!
I'm glad philanthropy round didn't exist in my day. While I like the idea of telling PNMs, say, "AEPhi supports the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation and Sharsheret, which supports Jewish women with breast cancer, and every year our chapter invites several local improv troupes to perform and the money raised from the event is sent to these two philanthropies" - I can't imagine trying to have a conversation and do a craft at the same time (and I'm pretty good at several types of crafts and great at multitasking). Plus, as you said, what kind of craft relates to pediatric AIDS and breast cancer? Maybe something to give to the kids with AIDS? What does the AEPhi chapter at IU do? (My own chapter doesn't participate in FR, so they don't do a "philanthropy round".)
__________________
AEΦ ... Multa Corda, Una Causa ... Celebrating Over 100 Years of Sisterhood
Have no place I can be since I found Serenity, but you can't take the sky from me...
Only those who risk going too far, find out how far they can go.
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