What am I doing wrong?

[mkaytay]

I went to a smaller school with a less competitive recruitment where it was a surprise if someone sent in a rec which seems similar to what you've got going on. I agree with Sciencewoman that joining groups you're passionate about is is great thing, but also think about maximizing the greek women you'll meet, and it may be there you are already (heck our vagina monologues was one of the most popular events to be involved with and had a ton of greek women). Getting to know women currently in chapters will make a big difference if you go through formal recruitment again. Also make note of the greek women in your classes and if you have group projects try to pair with them and get to know them there. Also, if you have a friend or two you trust who are currently in chapters or a similar guy friend who hangs out with some sorority women ask them if they can help you get to know more people. The best thing about all of this is it will build networking skills you'll be able to apply to making friends and advancing your career for the rest of your life!

On the recommendations thing, if your school is like mine, having them is not necessary at all, BUT it could be something to bring you to their attention if you flew under the radar. You can get these from any alumna of the chapter (former teachers, neighbors, alumna from your school), and if you don't know many sorority alumnae, check with your local Panhel Alumnae chapter and they're usually very helpful.

Like the very wise Sciencewoman said, not getting a bid at COB should not discourage you. They typically do not have many bids to give out and usually they gravitate to women they already know really well. Give another round of formal recruitment a go and take the time until then to network as much as possible. And if you're a junior when you go through make sure they know you are excited about being involved and want to make the most out of your remaining time as a member of the sorority.