Mizzou Recruitment

[WalkintheWoods]

Originally Posted by NorthernMom

I think again the most important thing for girls going through, is to keep an open mind and think for themselves where they feel a fit. I know there is chatter among the girls about tiers and some are devastated when they get cut from that heralded chapter or chapters. But all the chapters at Mizzou are fantastic. And to remember it's OK if you like ABC, and your roommate or Pi Chi friends like DEF or GHI. I know my daughter has friends (close ones) in different chapters.

Can't wait to hear how they thought today went!

NorthernMom is SO right on! These words are worth remembering and passing along to your daughter when she calls home (because "tiers" are irrelevant to where she will feel most at home, because what feels like home tends to change throughout the week, and because almost EVERY girl will get cut by at least a few of the houses she likes--that's the nature of Rush these days). Those cuts, painful as they may be, are all to the good because they encourages girls to let go of the houses where they aren't going to match and they can then focus on the houses that will be the best fit. Rush isn't perfect (what is?) but the system really does seem to work for the vast majority of people who stick it out--and that means beyond Bid Day too. Investing themselves in the house where they end up and being open to new friendships and possibilities. Sisterhood doesn't happen overnight!

My daughter, who's going through recruitment as a member for the first time, also texted me a picture this morning as she was waiting for the first group of PNMs to arrive. She's so excited! The active members have been working so hard to prepare for this week. I'm really looking forward to hearing stories from the Moms, PNMs and actives as we go through Recruitment.

Just a reminder for Moms of PNMs (and PNMs too): it's best not to post about particular houses that your daughter loves (or doesn't) by name as she goes through recruitment. Save the house name for announcing her Bid on Bid Day! You just never know who's lurking on this (or any) chat room or other social media outlet and you don't want people to somehow connect your daughter to a particular thread (as remote as that possibility may seem).

Thinking about all you Moms today! Keep breathing!

[NorthernMom]

It's also important not to take it personally. We are not from the area, and my sorority experience was light years from this. We had done some homework - gotten recs to most of the houses and read up a bit on SEC recruitment. But I think we were unprepared in some ways for just how resume driven recruitment really is. My daughter was very involved in a sport - but it was outside of her high school - because it was much more competitive at that level. However, because she spent most of her free time in that sport - and had to get to practices at a distance right after school - she didn't really participate in anything at her school. On paper, she looked pretty one dimensional. And she was not an academic standout in HS, though much better in college. So after the first round when she was cut pretty heavily, she was upset. She didn't understand why ABC that she loved so much, and really clicked with the girl she talked to, had cut her. She struggled to figure out what she was doing wrong? I wondered what was going wrong? We thought perhaps it related to being a transfer, and perhaps some of it did, but I think the reality was that her "resume" just didn't seem that impressive. Once you realize that, it seems less "personal".

There are girls with amazing resumes, and your girls may be among them. But if they experience cuts - it may be because on paper, they were not exactly what the chapter was looking for....not because they didn't like them personally in some way.

[WalkintheWoods]

Originally Posted by NorthernMom

It's also important not to take it personally. We are not from the area, and my sorority experience was light years from this. We had done some homework - gotten recs to most of the houses and read up a bit on SEC recruitment. But I think we were unprepared in some ways for just how resume driven recruitment really is. My daughter was very involved in a sport - but it was outside of her high school - because it was much more competitive at that level. However, because she spent most of her free time in that sport - and had to get to practices at a distance right after school - she didn't really participate in anything at her school. On paper, she looked pretty one dimensional. And she was not an academic standout in HS, though much better in college. So after the first round when she was cut pretty heavily, she was upset. She didn't understand why ABC that she loved so much, and really clicked with the girl she talked to, had cut her. She struggled to figure out what she was doing wrong? I wondered what was going wrong? We thought perhaps it related to being a transfer, and perhaps some of it did, but I think the reality was that her "resume" just didn't seem that impressive. Once you realize that, it seems less "personal".

There are girls with amazing resumes, and your girls may be among them. But if they experience cuts - it may be because on paper, they were not exactly what the chapter was looking for....not because they didn't like them personally in some way.

Once again am in total agreement with Northernmom--and even the girls who look amazing "on paper" can experience what seem to be inexplicable cuts (at least from their perspective). It's impossible to know for sure why anyone gets invited back or released from a particular house so there's no point on dwelling on it. It's normal to feel slighted and hurt and confused, and then the girls have to find a way to shake it off and move on, focusing on the houses where they will be returning.