Quote:
Originally Posted by FSUZeta
Heartoheart: Back to your recent question, "Can partying help or harm a girl's chances in recruitment", I think the possible negative outcomes far outweigh the inroads the PNM might perceive she is gaining. Rather than thinking that the PNM is their equal, and nudging each other in the ribs saying, "Wow, that girl can sure hold her liquor" in an admiring tone, any of the sorority members who have half sense and care about their chapter might look at PNM partygirl and think "Risk-management problem" and drop her at the first opportunity.
I would advise my daughter to lay low prior to recruitment, don't do anything that is breaking the law (and underage drinking falls into that category), and wait until after bid day to go to fraternity parties, but I am an overly cautious advisor.
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I think this is a case where what we want to say as alumnae, versus what some of us would have said as collegians, will differ significantly. I wish PNMs could totally avoid alcohol and frat parties until they were of age. But unfortunately the way Ole Miss's social structure is set up, the PNM who stays away completely will be locked out of many chances to meet sorority women.
Underage drinking is illegal, and I won't condone it. I didn't drink until I was 21, and I survived. Some PNMs will choose to drink. It may hurt their "reputation," or may not. I would advise any PNMs to be social, but avoid drinking. That means attending some parties, but refraining from the alcohol. The frat party/bar scene is such a big part of the pre-recruitment circuit that if you're not out sometimes, then you're missing chances to meet sorority women. Avoid weeknights (gotta keep those grades up), and study hard so your grades don't suffer during recruitment. Make sure to go out to at least one party on Friday and Saturday, even if you don't stick around long. See and be seen--no need to drink. Focus on the other girls there, not guys
. Avoid drinking because (1) it's illegal and (2) no one likes a sloppy PNM.
Better places to meet sorority women include the Honors College (if you're a part of it, look for 200-level classes that have some sophomores!), Associate Student Body (Ole Miss's student gov't.), and the clubs that recruit in the fall. As a bonus, being involved in these activities will look good come recruitment time!
Unfortunately the daughter's experience is not unusual. I also started being rushed as a high school senior and went to some of the Spring events like Derby Days--I assume these are some of the parties her daughter attended. They're a big part of the pre-recruitment meet-and-greet for sorority women if you are invited. I don't love that they're the nexus of Spring socializing for PNMs and sororities--I wish there was something like Theta Encore or a Greek Sing that PNMs could attend, instead of field parties--but it isn't unusual. But the centrality of alcohol in Greek life at Ole Miss is a whole 'nother discussion entirely!
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