Deactivation - please help! :(

[AXOrushadvisor]

I just read a really interesting article about advisors through a tweet. I just found it here http://tjsullivan.com/sorority-chapt...ut-of-control/ Some of us are nutty but we are there to help. If you don't want to work with us don't. There are other girls who will. If your National organization came in and released girls there was probably a good reason for it. Most general members wont know the "true" story just the "story" the disgruntled girls are telling you. There are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story. I'm pretty sure you are just hearing 1.

I'm sorry you don't think belonging to a group that has been around for 100 years is not worth your time. I'm here to tell you it is you just don't know it yet because your only 19 and your brain is not fully developed (not being mean it is the truth)

You have 3 pros and 2 cons. I think maybe your looking for a reason. It is summer time. Enjoy your summer and go back to school and have fun. When you get out into the real world you will thank all these women on here who gave you sage advice. Cause you'll get that first job because of your sorority affiliation. If you happen to find yourself in a new state with no friends working that new job, guess what? You'll have an instant connection with that sorority alumni group and make friends with people you don't know but whom you share a common bond with. TRUST ME on this.

[MaryPoppins]

Originally Posted by AXOrushadvisor

I just read a really interesting article about advisors through a tweet. I just found it here http://tjsullivan.com/sorority-chapt...ut-of-control/ Some of us are nutty but we are there to help. If you don't want to work with us don't. There are other girls who will. If your National organization came in and released girls there was probably a good reason for it. Most general members wont know the "true" story just the "story" the disgruntled girls are telling you. There are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story. I'm pretty sure you are just hearing 1.

I'm sorry you don't think belonging to a group that has been around for 100 years is not worth your time. I'm here to tell you it is you just don't know it yet because your only 19 and your brain is not fully developed (not being mean it is the truth)

You have 3 pros and 2 cons. I think maybe your looking for a reason. It is summer time. Enjoy your summer and go back to school and have fun. When you get out into the real world you will thank all these women on here who gave you sage advice. Cause you'll get that first job because of your sorority affiliation. If you happen to find yourself in a new state with no friends working that new job, guess what? You'll have an instant connection with that sorority alumni group and make friends with people you don't know but whom you share a common bond with. TRUST ME on this.

This is ABSOLUTELY the truth.

[33girl]

Lots of people have issues with Nationals micromanaging or, to put it plainly, wanting the chapter to be something different than the actual members want it to be. Trust me you are NOT a unique snowflake on this. If your advisors aren't being helpful, the chapter needs to tell your national council that their actions are harming the reputation of the chapter on campus and that membership numbers are going down because of it. Some advisors and national volunteers are not well prepared and don't know what they're doing. Unfortunately, they are often the ones who end up consulting chapters who need advisory and volunteer help the most. I'll probably get raked over the coals for that statement but it's the truth.

That being said, it sounds like you joined the sorority more for a quickie resume builder than for true sisterly relationships. You hate meetings, you hate formals, you hate rush, you hate most of the members, and you appear to think the main positive of membership is that the sorority serves as a mini Craigslist. Pack up your t-shirts and donate them to the little and grandlittle you claim to love so much (although methinks the work of the relationship has mostly been done on their ends) and submit your resignation.

[wildcat601]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Lots of people have issues with Nationals micromanaging or, to put it plainly, wanting the chapter to be something different than the actual members want it to be. Trust me you are NOT a unique snowflake on this.

Trust me, I know.

Originally Posted by 33girl

If your advisors aren't being helpful, the chapter needs to tell your national council that their actions are harming the reputation of the chapter on campus and that membership numbers are going down because of it. Some advisors and national volunteers are not well prepared and don't know what they're doing. Unfortunately, they are often the ones who end up consulting chapters who need advisory and volunteer help the most. I'll probably get raked over the coals for that statement but it's the truth.

This was well said. Though there are many girls in my chapter that are unhappy with our advisors, we were afraid that complaining would only result in more disagreement/conflict. Hopefully we can use your idea to make some improvements!

Originally Posted by 33girl

That being said, it sounds like you joined the sorority more for a quickie resume builder than for true sisterly relationships.

Sorry, but that's not true. Because I already found true sisterly relationships (granted, not with everyone, but still), this was the least of my concerns. I thought I'd be able to maintain these relationships regardless of my membership in the chapter. The relationships are a given so the rest of my pros/cons involved the factors you underlined (e.g. mini Craigslist). Also, I joined because I was looking for sisterhood; a sorority is a far cry from a resume builder.
This is just for the record, because a couple other posters had similar comments. Again, I appreciate your response

[KDCat]

Don't. Just don't.

You have friends in your sorority. It will affect your friendship if you quit. Stay for the sake of those friendships. You can't take it back once you quit. These friendships have the potential to be lifetime friendships. When I look at my FB feed, it's full of my sisters from when I was a collegian. We've been in each other's weddings. We are god mothers to each other's kids. We loved and supported one of our own while she had breast cancer. We grieved with another one of our own when her twin was killed in a car wreck. We've celebrated promotions and passing our professional licensing exams and lots of other stuff. We've been closer and farther apart at different times, but they are a constant in my life over the last 25 years. They know me and they know my history and they're the ones who have been there for the whole story of my life.

Right now, it is a huge time commitment. It's going to continue to be a huge time commitment. However, the mandatory part of this is experience is going to be over in 24 months or so. You have 2 more recruitment seasons and you're done. I know college seems like it's forever, but it's really over very quickly. Just do what you have to do and graduate. Once you have graduated, you can decide how much time to spend on your alumnae experience. You can decide how involved to be. If you want to walk away and not be involved, you can do that pretty much without penalty. If you want to stay very involved, you can do that. If you want to advise a chapter, you can. If you want to join an alumnae group, you can. Being an alum is a much less stressful experience.

24 months of hassle is worth it for a life time of sisterhood.

[wildcat601]

Originally Posted by KDCat

24 months of hassle is worth it for a life time of sisterhood.

Thanks for the wisdom

[wildcat601]

Originally Posted by AXOrushadvisor

If you don't want to work with us don't. There are other girls who will. If your National organization came in and released girls there was probably a good reason for it. Most general members wont know the "true" story just the "story" the disgruntled girls are telling you. There are ALWAYS 2 sides to every story. I'm pretty sure you are just hearing 1.

This year we had two instances where girls were removed from the house, and releasing a girl was considered but didn't happen. I don't think one of the cases was justified, but the other was reasonable. I recognize I still have some bias, but I didn't mean to imply that every punishment we received was cruel and unusual. Thanks for the article, and I apologize for making a general statement about advisors!

Originally Posted by AXOrushadvisor

You have 3 pros and 2 cons. I think maybe your looking for a reason.

This is a good point, I'll mull it over. Thank you again!