Joining another sorority after 2 years

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

I do like this point a lot. We refer to them as "new members" and the "new member period", but you're right -they're not really members yet. They're more like probationary members or aspiring members.

Then we bend over backward to not do anything that treats them differently than any other member, sometimes the point of absurdity. We can educate them in a little meeting, but we can't really put any responsibility on them to learn about the organization or sisters. We ask sisters to do more during the two weeks around recruitment than we ask new members to do in their entire new member period.

A freaking Men. This is why pledges don't understand the responsibilities of being a member. They have this period where it is (can be) all sunshine and rainbows and then boom they get all these responsibilities of being a member. They are now required to go to meetings, be involved, pay dues, make grades, etc. A lot of the new member period is just celebrating they are there: Bid day, Bid day parties, Big Sis Reveal week, Temp Big sisters for a bunch of weeks, Initiation week, usually a sisterhood retreat. I was on the new member education committee almost all of the terms I was a collegiate. I saw so many new members switch from "life is full of sunshine, rainbows and sprinkles" to "Holy Hell this is a big commitment". When I was a Rho Gam, I saw that happen to at least 75% of my PNMs. The other 25% were usually legacies who had been told what to expect/seen it with siblings.

I feel like somewhere along the line the idea of sorority membership gets lost. One is tied to the chapter and must work with other people to make the chapter great. It won't be laid out on a plater for you. Even chapters that are prestigious and really have their stuff together have members that keep it that way. There is a large commitment to be a member of any sorority. From the "top" chapter to the "bottom" chapter.

[carnation]

So true. Several of us on here followed the recruitment of a girl on FB last fall. She wasn't too happy with her result and the members could probably tell. Until she was initiated, her FB was full of members' posts saying, "We love you! You're beautiful! Can I do lunch with you?" I mean, her page was loaded with this stuff every day. She was eating it up.

After initiation, it stopped abruptly. I was betting that she would transfer or quit. I won.

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by carnation

So true. Several of us on here followed the recruitment of a girl on FB last fall. She wasn't too happy with her result and the members could probably tell. Until she was initiated, her FB was full of members' posts saying, "We love you! You're beautiful! Can I do lunch with you?" I mean, her page was loaded with this stuff every day. She was eating it up.

After initiation, it stopped abruptly. I was betting that she would transfer or quit. I won.

So did she quit or transfer?

[carnation]

She's transferring, although I haven't seen anything related to her sorority on her page for awhile. This is totally a kid who might try to re-rush in the fall at the new school.

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by carnation

She's transferring, although I haven't seen anything related to her sorority on her page for awhile. This is totally a kid who might try to re-rush in the fall at the new school.

This is an example of why I think the new member period is too short. I think we used to have more time to figure out before initiation if the sorority we pledged was a good fit. Better to depledge than to initiate and terminate.
Just my two cents.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by WCsweet<3

I feel like somewhere along the line the idea of sorority membership gets lost. One is tied to the chapter and must work with other people to make the chapter great. It won't be laid out on a plater for you. Even chapters that are prestigious and really have their stuff together have members that keep it that way. There is a large commitment to be a member of any sorority. From the "top" chapter to the "bottom" chapter.

The thing is (and I know I'm preaching to the choir, obv.), it's also rewarding and life-changing to be in a sorority. I think that pledges also need to see THAT, and it doesn't really happen that way. Often, during rush and the NM period, we push the social aspect and buy lots of gifts and things like that. And heck, when I was 16 years old, that was the stuff that was exciting.

But how can a chapter show pledges that a group is BOTH hard work and rewarding, in ways that go beyond "hey, look, we're doing a mixer with XYZ fraternity this weekend?"

I think it's good to move away from cheesy letter gifts and put a bigger emphasis on getting to know each other during the NM period, but I feel like it has to go beyond that. We had, nominally, pledge class officers, but I don't know if they really did anything. Could pledges have more things they have to do as a group, or is that hazing? I don't think it would be unreasonable for pledges to plan and do a community service day, for example.