Honeymoon Registry

[PeppyGPhiB]

Honeymoon, Mortgage, "Wishing Well" registries are all tacky for the same reason - they're registries for cash!

A Honeymoon Registry may offer people the chance to buy a massage, tour, sunset sail, etc., but that's really not what's going on. On a honeymoon registry, you just list some of the activities you want to do on your honeymoon and the approximate dollar amount next to it - people "buy" it for you, but really their money is just getting put into an account you set up with the company running the registry. In the end all the couple has is a bucket o' cash. So, in other words, they registered for money, which is horrible. What makes it worse is that the honeymoon registry companies charge a fee for each transaction/purchase, so some of the money that your guests think is going to you is actually going to the registry company.

The Knot is full of questions about honeymoon and other cash registries fronting as something they're not. It's stupid because people don't have to be told that cash is a welcome gift...it always is. But no one with any manners would ever TELL anyone they want cash.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by PeppyGPhiB

Honeymoon, Mortgage, "Wishing Well" registries are all tacky for the same reason - they're registries for cash!

A Honeymoon Registry may offer people the chance to buy a massage, tour, sunset sail, etc., but that's really not what's going on. On a honeymoon registry, you just list some of the activities you want to do on your honeymoon and the approximate dollar amount next to it - people "buy" it for you, but really their money is just getting put into an account you set up with the company running the registry. In the end all the couple has is a bucket o' cash. So, in other words, they registered for money, which is horrible. What makes it worse is that the honeymoon registry companies charge a fee for each transaction/purchase, so some of the money that your guests think is going to you is actually going to the registry company.

The Knot is full of questions about honeymoon and other cash registries fronting as something they're not. It's stupid because people don't have to be told that cash is a welcome gift...it always is. But no one with any manners would ever TELL anyone they want cash.

I'm all about avoiding tacky, but for couples that already have a home and don't need dishes and linens, I wouldn't mind this set up. Otherwise they'd be given a bunch of things they just don't need. If it's a specific this-is-for-the-honeymoon account, it's ok with me. I have a lot of friends getting married now but I know I'll have a lot more that will get married after they already have jobs and likely a nice place and plenty of cookware...honeymoon gifts are more useful in that case. To me that's far less offensive than the ones that overshoot on their registries and register only at expensive shops for only the expensive items. When I'm invited to a wedding it's an indication the guests aren't on par with the guests at the Trump weddings, and expecting people to spend an absolute buttload is rude, IMO.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

I'm all about avoiding tacky, but for couples that already have a home and don't need dishes and linens, I wouldn't mind this set up. Otherwise they'd be given a bunch of things they just don't need. If it's a specific this-is-for-the-honeymoon account, it's ok with me. I have a lot of friends getting married now but I know I'll have a lot more that will get married after they already have jobs and likely a nice place and plenty of cookware...honeymoon gifts are more useful in that case. To me that's far less offensive than the ones that overshoot on their registries and register only at expensive shops for only the expensive items. When I'm invited to a wedding it's an indication the guests aren't on par with the guests at the Trump weddings, and expecting people to spend an absolute buttload is rude, IMO.

I'm firmly of the mindset that everyone you invite to your wedding should know whether or not the couple has a home and doesn't need dishes and linens in advance, in order to judge whether or not cash would be more appropriate.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by agzg

I'm firmly of the mindset that everyone you invite to your wedding should know whether or not the couple has a home and doesn't need dishes and linens in advance, in order to judge whether or not cash would be more appropriate.

I just think it's practical to go the honeymoon route. And yes, giving them massages and whatnot is still handing them cash but it's more palatable than an envelope of money.

[VandalSquirrel]

I don't think I could, in good conscience and good manners, set up any sort of account or registry if I am already established and don't want people to give me gifts of their choice. So what if Aunt Bertha gives me a set of towels instead of money for a massage, I don't get to dictate what people give me. I'm just thankful they are giving me a gift and I'm getting married. If someone asked my family or bridal party for gift ideas that is where it could be mentioned, but I'm not going to register for things if I have a well equipped home, or for anything honeymoon related. Some people feel the need or want to give something, and I'll have that registry, but people can give something, or nothing, it doesn't really matter as long as they come to my wedding, and if they weren't invited and give a gift, how very thoughtful.

Entirely separate, but I immediately thought someone had one of those grody sex toy parties that are done like pampered chef and was promoting it for their shower/bachelorette party.