Significant other going into the military..

KSUViolet06 · #1 06-11-2009, 01:26 PM

I know a thing or 2 about these.

I think you have the advantage of having been together for 4 years. I think the issue with most military relationships is that the couple hasn't been together long enough before being separated by bootcamp/deployments/etc.

Be aware that with the US military, nothing is ever set in stone. What he may think he'll be doing after bootcamp may not be what happens.

I also wouldn't move anywhere without a ring AND a date at the VERY LEAST.

THis thread has some interesting insight on miltiary relationships as well: http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...light=military

twinkle555 · #2 06-11-2009, 02:14 PM

[QUOTE=KSUViolet06;1816219][COLOR="Magenta"]I know a thing or 2 about these.

I think you have the advantage of having been together for 4 years. I think the issue with most military relationships is that the couple hasn't been together long enough before being separated by bootcamp/deployments/etc.

Be aware that with the US military, nothing is ever set in stone. What he may think he'll be doing after bootcamp may not be what happens.

I also wouldn't move anywhere without a ring AND a date at the VERY LEAST.

THis thread has some interesting insight on miltiary relationships as well: http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...light=military

Thanks KSUViolet. I actually read over that thread somewhat yesterday..yay for search! Lol.

I think the fact that the military is so unpredictable is what is making me crazy..I kind of like to know what is going to happen in my own life! I actually have accepted this more than the bf has..I'm more realistic.

And yes, the ring is a must, and I have a date set in my mind that I've been wanting for while

Educatingblue · #3 06-11-2009, 05:57 PM

Call me old fashioned, but I have never been an advocate of people moving in together...maybe right before the wedding, but that's it. I just feel like moving in makes one or both of you complacent in the relationship and really no reason to move forward.

As AOII mentioned, if you are going to move, I would not move until you have a ring AND a date...and really you should wait as close to the wedding as possible if you are going to get married.

On the other hand, if you are OK with the moving in thing (everyone shouldn't be married) and will have no regrets in 10 years when you are still just living together and not married, then go for it...

AOII_LB93 · #4 06-11-2009, 10:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Educatingblue

Call me old fashioned, but I have never been an advocate of people moving in together...maybe right before the wedding, but that's it. I just feel like moving in makes one or both of you complacent in the relationship and really no reason to move forward.

As AOII mentioned, if you are going to move, I would not move until you have a ring AND a date...and really you should wait as close to the wedding as possible if you are going to get married.

On the other hand, if you are OK with the moving in thing (everyone shouldn't be married) and will have no regrets in 10 years when you are still just living together and not married, then go for it...

I completely agree with everything you said Eblue....if you're okay with not being married, then don't get married. I don't have a problem with that as long as it's truly what both people in the relationship want. I've seen a lot of people of both sexes just go for what the other person wants because they know it's the only way to keep their SO around....kinda sad really.

twinkle555 · #5 06-12-2009, 02:18 AM

I wasn't planning on moving in with my boyfriend, but I was living at home with my parents and younger brother who I never got along with. I finally just had to move out on a whim one night b/c my bro and I got into a fist fight and I just couldn't take it anymore. I guess I just stuck with it b/c it was easier living with my bf than my insane brother.

I defintely want to get married. I will NOT move anywhere without a ring and he knows this.

KSUViolet06 · #6 06-12-2009, 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by twinkle555

I wasn't planning on moving in with my boyfriend, but I was living at home with my parents and younger brother who I never got along with. I finally just had to move out on a whim one night b/c my bro and I got into a fist fight and I just couldn't take it anymore. I guess I just stuck with it b/c it was easier living with my bf than my insane brother.

I defintely want to get married. I will NOT move anywhere without a ring and he knows this.

Um, what?

VandalSquirrel · #7 06-12-2009, 04:51 PM

If it comes down to a ring and no set date (because you don't have the money for deposits and a wedding due to a ring purchase) a ring isn't required. Lots of people never get engagement rings, or you could select something less expensive, such as a birth stone, so you can have both. The engagement ring isn't the be all end all, and it doesn't matter if all you have is a ring and no wedding or marriage because you're broke. I didn't wear my ring most of my engagement and it didn't make me any less engaged as we had set dates and planned a wedding before moving in together.

twinkle555 · #8 06-13-2009, 02:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Um, what?

Yep. Not much else I can say about that...although I enjoyed living with my bf a whole lot better. I know, its a strange way to just move out, but I couldn't focus...