Single ladies, how do you respond to "why aren't you married yet?"

[christiangirl]

^^^I love getting IDed at places because I look 16. It's like "HAHA, FOOLED YOU!!!"

Originally Posted by XOMichelle

My divorced parents are starting to ask me if they think my 25 year-old sister is going to marry her boyfriend of 3 years. They independently ask my sister if she thinks I will marry my boyfriend of 2 (I'm 28). They don't ask us directly, they ask the other sister. It's a riot!

My family was so worried about the fact that I didn't have a boyfriend (or seem interested in boys at all) that, starting at age 15, my dad and sister took turns asking me if I was a lesbian. Once I started actively trying to date (midway through college), they stopped asking but the fact that they went there in the first place made me so....ugh, I don't even have words. What is the big friggin' deal about being single, even for long periods of time? I'm not a "dater," what can I say? My relatives now ask at EVERY get-together why I'm not dating someone and when am I gonna "get on it." My new answer for the holiday season: I have better things to do than a guy.

[epchick]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

My family was so worried about the fact that I didn't have a boyfriend (or seem interested in boys at all) that, starting at age 15, my dad and sister took turns asking me if I was a lesbian. Once I started actively trying to date (midway through college), they stopped asking but the fact that they went there in the first place made me so....ugh, I don't even have words. What is the big friggin' deal about being single, even for long periods of time? I'm not a "dater," what can I say? My relatives now ask at EVERY get-together why I'm not dating someone and when am I gonna "get on it." My new answer for the holiday season: I have better things to do than a guy.

My aunt asked me the same thing after I told her my younger cousin was a lesbian. She flat out told me, "Ok, so we have one lesbian, when are you going to come out?" and then laughed. Seriously? I don't date, i'm not a big dater. My mom is really judgemental and so I just rather stay away from dating than hearing any of her lip. Why is it if someone isn't dating, it's cause they're gay?

When family would ask (especially the ones i haven't seen in a while) I would say that I was focusing on school. Recently, one of my bitchy relatives goes "well you've graduated from college, what's your excuse now?"

[WVU alpha phi]

I've been with my boyfriend five months and my parents met him about a month ago when they came to visit and help me move. They both loved him, thought he was so polite, southern gentleman, etc. (which he is and I love it). So my mom asked if I thought he was "the one" and I just laughed and said I don't know! At this age (23), I don't think I'd date someone if I didn't see a future with them, but I also realize that we're still in the "honeymoon" phase of dating and to be thinking marriage this early on is ridiculous.

I was on the phone with my sister about a month ago helping her with Spanish homework and I had her on speaker, with my boyfriend sitting next to me. She asked about me coming home for Christmas and if he was coming (no), then said "do you think you'll get a ring for Christmas?" and I said "NO! We've only been dating 4 months!" BF looked bewildered and said "try more like 4 years from now!"

My sister is 27 and has NEVER had a boyfriend (there are several factors to this). My family completely leaves her alone on the marriage subject, or even dating subject. I've had boyfriends since HS and marriage has come up several times.

I was dating someone when I was 18, I'd consider him my first love. We dated about 9 months and broke up for several reasons, but mainly we went to school 8 hours apart and he was pretty possessive. Post breakup, my mom told me my grandmother asked her if she thought then-bf was "the one" and my mom laughed and said I was only 18. My grandmother then told her she'd never seen me so happy before. (that comment haunts me to this day!)

[Dionysus]

Originally Posted by epchick

My aunt asked me the same thing after I told her my younger cousin was a lesbian. She flat out told me, "Ok, so we have one lesbian, when are you going to come out?" and then laughed. Seriously? I don't date, i'm not a big dater. My mom is really judgemental and so I just rather stay away from dating than hearing any of her lip. Why is it if someone isn't dating, it's cause they're gay?

We should trade places. My mother is in denial about me being gay, she just think that I haven't found the right guy yet or am not interested in dating. I haven't been with a guy since 2002, and was never boy-crazy. I'm just shocked that this has not aroused ANY suspicion from her or anyone else in my family.

[epchick]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

We should trade places. My mother is in denial about me being gay, she just think that I haven't found the right guy yet or am not interested in dating. I haven't been with a guy since 2002, and was never boy-crazy. I'm just shocked that this has not aroused ANY suspicion from her or anyone else in my family.

Ha...we should! My mom has never really asked or seemed to care whether I was dating someone or not. I think she secretly hopes I hold off on dating, so I don't end up being like her---dating a guy right @ the end of college and getting pregnant.

She seems to be kind of judgmental about the people I date, But when she found out my cousin was gay, she embraced her (at this point, my cousin's mom is the only one that doesn't know), no judgements at all. Hmmm...i think i got the short end of the stick! lol

[AOII_LB93]

Originally Posted by epchick

My aunt asked me the same thing after I told her my younger cousin was a lesbian. She flat out told me, "Ok, so we have one lesbian, when are you going to come out?" and then laughed. Seriously? I don't date, i'm not a big dater. My mom is really judgemental and so I just rather stay away from dating than hearing any of her lip. Why is it if someone isn't dating, it's cause they're gay?

When family would ask (especially the ones i haven't seen in a while) I would say that I was focusing on school. Recently, one of my bitchy relatives goes "well you've graduated from college, what's your excuse now?"

That's when you pull a Katherine Heigl from 27 Dresses and say something to the effect of, "I really like having random sex with strangers, so getting married just isn't on the table right now, but thanks for asking."

[cali_gossip]

Originally Posted by AOII_LB93

That's when you pull a Katherine Heigl from 27 Dresses and say something to the effect of, "I really like having random sex with strangers, so getting married just isn't on the table right now, but thanks for asking."

LOL awesome! I wish I could try that family. They're the kind that gasp whenever the word "sex" gets metioned. I can only imagine the priceless reactions I'd get!

[LadyDread2010]

I tell them to mind their own business...it's my life,not theirs.

[HotDamnImAPhiMu]

More often I get the related "Why are you single?!"

I tell them it's because I'm kind of a bitch.

[AGDee]

This thread is too long to see if I posted this quote, but I had this "quote of the day for women" type calendar a few years back. My favorite of them all was:

"I think, therefore, I am single"

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

I didn't have a boyfriend (or seem interested in boys at all) that, starting at age 15, my dad and sister took turns asking me if I was a lesbian. Once I started actively trying to date (midway through college), they stopped asking but the fact that they went there in the first place made me so....ugh, I don't even have words. What is the big friggin' deal about being single, even for long periods of time? I'm not a "dater," what can I say? My relatives now ask at EVERY get-together why I'm not dating someone and when am I gonna "get on it." My new answer for the holiday season: I have better things to do than a guy.

When I was single, I doubt anyone questioned my preferences. I think it was because I did have plenty of dates--most of them frog princes I was kissing who had CapitalOne rules... LOL...

I wanted to be in a stable relationship with someone who I loved and who loved me in return. But, later in single life, I found out you have different kinds of dates... I had my Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday (a lot of those), Saturday (plenty of those) and Sunday (a few of those) dates. Then I had a entire dry season for a year... That was very difficult for me--especially when I was down for "routine maintenance" early in the morning from Wednesday to Thursday... LOL...

Usually, when loving family members or elders would ask me if I was dating when I was single, I would say "no, but do you know of anyone?" Then I asked "if he was cute and has money?" That usually stopped the questions...

And I got everyone pissed of with me when I eloped and got married to a gentleman very few people knew... It's been 5.5 years now...