Help with Conversation and Stereotypes at Rush!

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by irishpipes

If your post is truthful, and the PNMs going through recruitment are almost all the legally blonde type, except for the 3-4 that pledge your sorority, then your problem isn't conversation skills - it's that the PNMs don't mesh with your chapter. It sounds more like you need to encourage more girls who are like the girls in your chapter to go through recruitment, or find them through COR. I mean, improved conversation skills are great, but if your group of friends is truly nothing like the PNMs going through recruitment, then through mutual selection it makes sense that you don't want each other. Either expand your membership base to include some legally blondes, or COR for the kind of girls you want.

Exactly what I was trying to get across in far fewer words.

[breathesgelatin]

I want to reply at length to this post, but don't have the time right now.

Off the top of my head one thing I am noticing is that you are focusing WAY TOO MUCH on what the other groups are like and what is right with them. Focus on YOU. Do not feel insecure with being you. You speak with a lot of pride about your sorority, but I think underlying some of your remarks is a fundamental insecurity about not having the "legally blond" stereotype...

OK, I'm going to stop for now but I promise to come back and post more.

[KSUViolet06]

This is a good read:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...aller+chapters

I would like to come back and elaborate more, but some key points:

*Focus on YOU. As stated above, you can't concern yourself with telling PNMs how you're different from _______ sorority because they _________ and we don't. That bases your rush strategy on talking about other chapters, and not on promoting yourselves.

*Stop focusing so much on "selling the sorority." You cannot start on recruitment day 1 with selling your sorority. Believe it or not, that can actually turn PNMs off to you guys if the minute they walk in, you're talking up your chapter, philanthropy, events, etc. In the beginning, you need to focus on getting to know the girls as PEOPLE and connect with them on a person-to-person level. Once you've gotten to know them, they can start to see you as people they could see themselves being friends with. When they can see you as that, THEN you can "sell the sorority" to them in the later rounds (like 3rd and pref), but you need to make the indivdual connection before you can pitch them the sorority.

[AOEforme]

Have you tried using the fact that you are smaller to your advantage?

There are girls going through recruitment who are only looking for status. Give them up as a lost cause, because they will never want you nor, if you're being truly honest with yourself, will you ever want them. They are not right for your group.

But there are girls going through formal lookng for a tight-knit sisterhood that they truly mesh with and you have that. (It's a lot easier to get to know 16 girls really, really well than 75.) My sorority intentionally pledges below quota every year because that what distinguishes us from other groups on campus. We look at it as a benefit, not a disadvantage. We look at it as being selective, rather than taking-whatever-we-can-get.

Also push leadership opportunities! It much easier to get involved in a smaller sorority. (Be careful though to not make it sound like "we NEED you to be a leader"...)

It's one of the reasons I declined my bid from XYZ and went for this chapter.

I bet also that if you stop looking at your small size as a disadvantage and a sign that "something is wrong with you" and see it as an asset, your recruitment style will change. The PNMs will notice your confidence and really want to be a member of your close sisterhood.