Question on Rushing in my 30s (Fraternity)

[Elephant Walk]

Originally Posted by lucgreek

Just my two cents but:

(This portion isn't meant to inflame or anger anyone, it's just what I have been exposed to/heard about/know of the APO at my school. Again, organizations differ by school, so take this as what they are considered at my school.)

First and foremost, at my school, APO is considered a club (by the school and by the students), just like a professional GLO. They don't sit on any sort of fraternity or sorority board, thusly I do not consider them a fraternity. Just because you call yourself a fraternity does not automatically make it so.

Also, APO at my university has more drama, bullshit, and members that dislike each other than any social fraternity/sorority (There was a case of several people deactivating because one of their friends didn't get elected president, along with cases of members openly disliking other ones and bashing them. I've also had a friend who kicked her own APO members out of a party she was having because they were talking shit). Take that as you will. My friends in APO feel much less a sense of belonging to a whole than I do with my social fraternity, I've been repeatedly told by so many people that they do it for their resume (and that's how they recruit on campus, just as a resume builder). And again, at my school as long as you do your APO services hours you get in.

But back to the original poster's question!

I don't know the fraternities where you are going, but it really depends. Speaking honestly, I don't know if you would have a lot in common with your undergrad pledge brothers and other potential brothers. That's the key thing I look for when considering people at rush events, whether or not they get along and whether they would fit.

Also, would you be willing to go to all the events that are undoubtedly required of you? Because you're over 30, I don't know if going to sorority mixers would even interest you. Would you be willing to do the undoubted bitch work of cleaning up after a party or mixer?

If you were rushing at my school, I would have to see how you bonded with everyone, especially the newest members just because if you don't really bond or have things in common with them, you probably won't spend time with your pledge class.

Honestly, I, personally, don't think I would pledge at your age, just because of the sheer amount of bitch work and 'paying your dues' you have to do as a pledge.

good post

[SPEtx454]

IMO, as a member, who has had a 30 and 50 something year old brothers, if they let you in, they should have the respect to treat you as a brother, if not at least a man, In Sigma Phi Epsilon, most chapters employ a balanced man stance which means you are a brother with full rights and privileges when you join, http://www.uwsigep.org/ is their website, check em out, if you want i can even get you in contact with their VP of recruitment so that they can answer any questions you have, also many chapters have a balanced man scholarship to help cover books, or even dues if you join. so i would say, enjoy your experience and being Greek is only going to make it better.

[Kato]

Thanks everyone for the interesting comments and observations. No I hadn't known prior to starting this thread that there were different types of GLS's, so if anything I'm a little better educated than I was yesterday.

I am really a bit more interested in the social comeraderie and events of a social organization. In addition to the lifetime networking I see this point in my life as my last real opportunity to play big and have fun. I'm just lucky enough to have a wife that understands and appreciates this opportunity and supports me in it (I know a LOT would be highly opposed to the idea).

Also I'll be frank, once I left the service I realized very quickly how much of a void was left when I no longer had fellows that I could identify so closely with as I did my squad, platoon and company mates. I may be assuming that Greek societies are the same level of do-or-die friendship, but it seems to me the closest thing to what I have grown to know.

I'll take the advice of those that have suggested taking a look never hurts. Like I said earlier, if there is an obvious fit with a group that's great, but if not that's fine too. I'll integrate into something, be it a GLS, a club sport or whatnot, and enjoy my time.

Again thanks to everyone on both sides of this discussion for your interesting comments.

Originally Posted by SPEtx454

IMO, as a member, who has had a 30 and 50 something year old brothers, if they let you in, they should have the respect to treat you as a brother, if not at least a man, In Sigma Phi Epsilon, most chapters employ a balanced man stance which means you are a brother with full rights and privileges when you join, http://www.uwsigep.org/ is their website, check em out, if you want i can even get you in contact with their VP of recruitment so that they can answer any questions you have, also many chapters have a balanced man scholarship to help cover books, or even dues if you join. so i would say, enjoy your experience and being Greek is only going to make it better.

Thanks for the suggestion, I'll take a good look at their web site and get in touch with their recruitment officer with a few of my question.