Quote:
Originally Posted by phimu88
Oh well I just hope she finds the one she really loves if she decides to join one at all. It is completely up to her. She will be attending a recruitment reception in a couple of weeks. Maybe she will learn something about each of the sororities then.
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That's my feeling. I've had my daughter and niece go through recruitment and my biological sister coming up. I'm still very active, locally and nationally, and all of them are aware of it. My daughter and my niece have both attended open events with other actives and alums and enjoyed it immensely (my sister lives some distance away so couldn't attend).
When my daughter went to college, she was very eager for recruitment. She went to a school where we don't have a chapter, but I encouraged her to go through even though she had no real knowledge of the other GLOs. She went thru as a first semester freshman and was cut after first rounds. She was upset a bit, but also taken aback by how fast paced recruitment was, so it didn't bother her too much. She decided to go through informal in the spring and soon found out why she was cut the previous semester. After the first round of events, she ran into a sister from one of the GLO's in a bar near school. The girl was a little tipsy and point black told my daughter that she needed to drop out of rush because no one was going to bid "some handicapped chick." My daughter was upset at first, then angry. And I was both angry and horrified. My daughter eventually went through AI with Theta Phi. (Don't jump on the AI part...there's a whole different thread about that!)
When my niece went to college (she's not considered a legacy by our standards), I was thrilled she was going where we had a chapter. I was a bit of a nudge about her going through recruitment

I really wanted her to go through because you can't know about it unless you do, right? When she got to her prefs, I got a phone call - did I care if she went somewhere else? I told her the same thing I told my daughter - if you choose a house and the house chooses you, I don't care which it is. Just let me know when your fund raisers and philanthropies are. That put her at ease a bit, I think. I'm pleased to say that she's now a Theta Phi sister.
I don't think a legacy should be cut just because she's a legacy elsewhere. But I have one argument that I haven't seen here (if it is, sorry I missed it!) I fully understand that the chapter wants a good fit, but I'm sure many of you have had the "psycho sister" or "sister from hell" experience. And sometimes those psycho sisters turn out to grow up and be wonderful and active alums, giving more time and money to the chapter and organization as a whole than anyone would have ever thought possible. (I know there was at least one of those when I was active!) And the last time I checked, we're members for life, not just for a couple years in college. That shy legacy who was kinda quiet and took AP Calculus her junior year in high school? Who's to say she couldn't end up being National Treasurer one day. I'm not saying that legacies deserve any more preferential treatment than they already get. But maybe a look from a different perspective. That actually could go for any PNM.
Sorry so long winded. Couldn't spit it out any other way.