Facebook - Privacy Violation?

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by Thetagirl218

I think the whole point is that your facebook or myspace may be a reflection of who you are to the outside world. If you have pictures of you drinking on one section of the page, and on the other side have a section for "A proud member of XYZ!" it sends a mixed message!

I don't think that is the whole problem so much...if you are of legal age there's absolutely nothing wrong with drinking. The problem is when people drink too much. Not saying I've never done it, but it's not all that classy and we all know it.

Like I've said, it's in our code of standards that we can't associate our letters with alcohol. I understand this, even for those of legal age, because of the stereotypes surrounding greek life. It's one way of combating those. So our solution is to say that if you've got alcohol on your page, you have to remove your letters. Of course, no one is going to choose the beer bottle over the letters. Problem solved.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I don't think that is the whole problem so much...if you are of legal age there's absolutely nothing wrong with drinking. The problem is when people drink too much. Not saying I've never done it, but it's not all that classy and we all know it.

Like I've said, it's in our code of standards that we can't associate our letters with alcohol. I understand this, even for those of legal age, because of the stereotypes surrounding greek life. It's one way of combating those. So our solution is to say that if you've got alcohol on your page, you have to remove your letters. Of course, no one is going to choose the beer bottle over the letters. Problem solved.

OK, but what if you have an album of your vineyard trip to France or Italy (which happened WITH YOUR PARENTS) and then a sister writes on your wall, reminding you of a meeting? Does that count or not? What if you mention communion wine or the alcohol in medication?

By the way, I'm pretty sure alcohol and letters rule is an active thing and does not apply to alumnae.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

OK, but what if you have an album of your vineyard trip to France or Italy (which happened WITH YOUR PARENTS) and then a sister writes on your wall, reminding you of a meeting? Does that count or not? What if you mention communion wine or the alcohol in medication?

By the way, I'm pretty sure alcohol and letters rule is an active thing and does not apply to alumnae.

Technically that falls into the category and shouldn't be posted. Though I doubt anyone is going to report someone to EC for being around a bunch of grapes. Why in the world would you be writing about communion wine or alcohol in medication on facebook or myspace?

I never said it applied to alums.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

Technically that falls into the category and shouldn't be posted. Though I doubt anyone is going to report someone to EC for being around a bunch of grapes. Why in the world would you be writing about communion wine or alcohol in medication on facebook or myspace?

I never said it applied to alums.

1. I think it's sad that it technically shouldn't be posted because it's really a cultural and educational experience (I've never been to a vineyard in Europe, but did go to one in the Niagara area in Ontario). In many ways, not allowing it is a form cultural discrimination (e.g. a girl talking about joining the "grown up table" at the age of 16 and being offered a glass of wine while visiting relatives in the "old country" where it's perfectly legal for a 16 year old to drink), but that might be taking it too far. Trips to vineyards and drinking responsibly with family in the old country are very different from boozing at a party.
   
2. Maybe someone volunteers at a church and talked about how communion wine is prepared.
   
3. You never said it didn't apply to alumnae either.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

1. I think it's sad that it technically shouldn't be posted because it's really a cultural and educational experience (I've never been to a vineyard in Europe, but did go to one in the Niagara area in Ontario). In many ways, not allowing it is a form cultural discrimination (e.g. a girl talking about joining the "grown up table" at the age of 16 and being offered a glass of wine while visiting relatives in the "old country" where it's perfectly legal for a 16 year old to drink), but that might be taking it too far. Trips to vineyards and drinking responsibly with family in the old country are very different from boozing at a party.
2. Maybe someone volunteers at a church and talked about how communion wine is prepared.
3. You never said it didn't apply to alumnae either.

Before you twist your panties further, look at the facts. Factually, that IS against the code of standards. It is worded so that alcohol cannot be associated with our letters in any way. It doesn't have a, b, and c for exceptions. Do I think anyone is going to turn a girl into EC for being in a vineyard with her parents? No. That's just the way it is...personally I don't have much patience for people who get so worked up about that. It's not a big deal to just leave alcohol out of the picture. There's a reason for it...unfortunately the bad eggs ruined it for the rest of us.

I don't see why someone would have the desperate need to discuss that on a facebook or mypace. It's a personal thing, but with me I don't discuss things so important on a facebook. If they chose to, again, I doubt they'd be turned in. But yes, that's technically against the code of standards as well. I can't see a situation in which it is absolutely essential to post something like that online.

Ok. Wah.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

Before you twist your panties further, look at the facts. Factually, that IS against the code of standards. It is worded so that alcohol cannot be associated with our letters in any way. It doesn't have a, b, and c for exceptions. Do I think anyone is going to turn a girl into EC for being in a vineyard with her parents? No. That's just the way it is...personally I don't have much patience for people who get so worked up about that. It's not a big deal to just leave alcohol out of the picture. There's a reason for it...unfortunately the bad eggs ruined it for the rest of us.

I don't see why someone would have the desperate need to discuss that on a facebook or mypace. It's a personal thing, but with me I don't discuss things so important on a facebook. If they chose to, again, I doubt they'd be turned in. But yes, that's technically against the code of standards as well. I can't see a situation in which it is absolutely essential to post something like that online.

Ok. Wah.

People always put vacation pictures on Facebook and MySpace. That's just the way it is. And if the entire trip to France or Italy was about touring vineyards, then you're going to have pictures that are alcohol related.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

People always put vacation pictures on Facebook and MySpace. That's just the way it is. And if the entire trip to France or Italy was about touring vineyards, then you're going to have pictures that are alcohol related.

Why is it such a big deal to you? So get them printed and make a really cool photo album to use on your coffee table instead of a generic book. If your facebook and myspace are THAT important to you...well...that's an issue outside of greek life.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

Before you twist your panties further, look at the facts. Factually, that IS against the code of standards. It is worded so that alcohol cannot be associated with our letters in any way. It doesn't have a, b, and c for exceptions. Do I think anyone is going to turn a girl into EC for being in a vineyard with her parents? No.

Unless it's a sister she's feudiung with who wants her to get kicked out.

Unless it's someone that has a grudge against the sorority.

And then the HQ kind of is backed into a corner because they made this stupid, ridiculous, all-encompassing rule. Unless they want to appear to be playing favorites, they DO have to discipline someone for something as lame as a pic of them at a winery with their parents.

Then again, in a few years we'll probably be compelled to share our entire medical history with companies we're interviewing at (think Gattaca) so I guess this is kind of small potatoes.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Unless it's a sister she's feudiung with who wants her to get kicked out.

Unless it's someone that has a grudge against the sorority.

And then the HQ kind of is backed into a corner because they made this stupid, ridiculous, all-encompassing rule. Unless they want to appear to be playing favorites, they DO have to discipline someone for something as lame as a pic of them at a winery with their parents.

Then again, in a few years we'll probably be compelled to share our entire medical history with companies we're interviewing at (think Gattaca) so I guess this is kind of small potatoes.

Then too bad for her.

Of course there are procedures for everything. It's unlikely that she would get kicked out for the pictures. Disciplined, yes.

I just fail to see how this is a big deal.

[fantASTic]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I don't think that is the whole problem so much...if you are of legal age there's absolutely nothing wrong with drinking. The problem is when people drink too much. Not saying I've never done it, but it's not all that classy and we all know it.

Like I've said, it's in our code of standards that we can't associate our letters with alcohol. I understand this, even for those of legal age, because of the stereotypes surrounding greek life. It's one way of combating those. So our solution is to say that if you've got alcohol on your page, you have to remove your letters. Of course, no one is going to choose the beer bottle over the letters. Problem solved.

I agree with you...in the fact that if the rules say so, we have to do it. What I disagree with is the fact that even if your profile is set to private, you STILL cannot have them up.

And I fail to see the point of the rule if it's okay for alumnae to do it; I know it's only because we can't really police alumnae like we can actives, or hold their membership up for behavior, etc, but it just seems like trying to fix the stereotype won't work if the majority of Greeks can still drink in letters and put alcohol pix on Facebook.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by fantASTic

I agree with you...in the fact that if the rules say so, we have to do it. What I disagree with is the fact that even if your profile is set to private, you STILL cannot have them up.

And I fail to see the point of the rule if it's okay for alumnae to do it; I know it's only because we can't really police alumnae like we can actives, or hold their membership up for behavior, etc, but it just seems like trying to fix the stereotype won't work if the majority of Greeks can still drink in letters and put alcohol pix on Facebook.

Private profiles don't do any good. Most of the time, the picture wasn't posted by the person with the drink in hand, but by someone else and was tagged. Unless they can get their friend to remove the photo, it's up their for all of THEIR friends to see. Private profiles are also only as good as the friends you add. Pictures can just be reposted somewhere else. And last but not least, you're supposed to be in Recruitment mode year round. Unless your ONLY friends are in your sorority, it's likely a PNM will see the pictures. Why is it such a big deal? PUT THE BEER DOWN. Wah.

I have no idea what the rules are for alums in my organization. I'm not one and I have a year left. But it doesn't miss the point at all. The REASON that organizations have these all encompassing rules is that COLLEGIANS tend to binge drink and drink under age. It's a problem for all college students...I don't buy that it's a Greek issue, but the rules are a necessary response to show the world that our organizations don't support these behaviors. As a college graduate and an adult, people are much less likely to comment on your behavior in that manner.

[Taualumna]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

Private profiles don't do any good. Most of the time, the picture wasn't posted by the person with the drink in hand, but by someone else and was tagged. Unless they can get their friend to remove the photo, it's up their for all of THEIR friends to see. Private profiles are also only as good as the friends you add. Pictures can just be reposted somewhere else. And last but not least, you're supposed to be in Recruitment mode year round. Unless your ONLY friends are in your sorority, it's likely a PNM will see the pictures. Why is it such a big deal? PUT THE BEER DOWN. Wah.

I have no idea what the rules are for alums in my organization. I'm not one and I have a year left. But it doesn't miss the point at all. The REASON that organizations have these all encompassing rules is that COLLEGIANS tend to binge drink and drink under age. It's a problem for all college students...I don't buy that it's a Greek issue, but the rules are a necessary response to show the world that our organizations don't support these behaviors. As a college graduate and an adult, people are much less likely to comment on your behavior in that manner.

The beer may be down, but there still might be alcohol in the picture. In fact, it might not even be in your place setting.

Maybe I was brought up with a different outlook on alcohol. Alcohol was and still is considered a "grown up" drink in my family, but it was never condemned or considered a bad thing. I watched my parents drink wine at dinner and I was given a wine glass with grape juice or apple juice so I could be "just like the grown ups." When I turned 19 (the legal drinking age here), the juice was replaced with the real thing. My official 19th birthday was wine and dinner with my family. I don't understand why other people weren't brought up the same way. Maybe if people thought about things this way, we'd have fewer problems.

[nittanyalum]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

I don't understand why other people weren't brought up the same way.

This seems to be the root of all of the issues you vent about here. It's a big wide world full of people from all sorts of different places and experiences. If you embraced that a little more maybe you wouldn't sweat so much of the small stuff.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

The beer may be down, but there still might be alcohol in the picture. In fact, it might not even be in your place setting.

Maybe I was brought up with a different outlook on alcohol. Alcohol was and still is considered a "grown up" drink in my family, but it was never condemned or considered a bad thing. I watched my parents drink wine at dinner and I was given a wine glass with grape juice or apple juice so I could be "just like the grown ups." When I turned 19 (the legal drinking age here), the juice was replaced with the real thing. My official 19th birthday was wine and dinner with my family. I don't understand why other people weren't brought up the same way. Maybe if people thought about things this way, we'd have fewer problems.

You keep forgetting you're from Canada. The attitude toward alcohol there is much different (IMO much healthier) than the US (most likely the French influence, whether you live in Quebec or not). At least that's the impression I've always gotten.

Stupid Puritans.

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Originally Posted by Taualumna

The beer may be down, but there still might be alcohol in the picture. In fact, it might not even be in your place setting.

Maybe I was brought up with a different outlook on alcohol. Alcohol was and still is considered a "grown up" drink in my family, but it was never condemned or considered a bad thing. I watched my parents drink wine at dinner and I was given a wine glass with grape juice or apple juice so I could be "just like the grown ups." When I turned 19 (the legal drinking age here), the juice was replaced with the real thing. My official 19th birthday was wine and dinner with my family. I don't understand why other people weren't brought up the same way. Maybe if people thought about things this way, we'd have fewer problems.

That's nice and all, but the rest of the world DOESN'T revolve around your family. I used to think it would solve all of the world's problems as well until I started hanging out with European students. I don't know anyone else who can get so completely plastered and start again at 8 in the morning. Binge drinking isn't a US problem. Nor is drinking underage. But both are huge problems for greek organizations.

There is a REASON the code of standards states that alcohol cannot be associated with our letters. Too many bad eggs ruined it for the rest of us. Greeks have a hard time dealing with the constant onslaught of negative publicity for binge drinking and underage drinking as it is. It does not help to be drinking in your letters.

Blanket rules in schools, clubs, greek organizations, etc. are there for a reason. No one can wiggle their way out, that way. Better safe than sorry.

There are bigger things in the world to get upset about. If it is THAT important for alcohol to be prominent in your life that you can't just keep some pictures on your bulletin board or coffee table, then you are not in a healthy place mentally. I don't care where you're from or who you are, it is a VERY small thing to ask that you not put alcoholic photographs on facebook. If you can't handle it, maybe you don't need to be a part of ANY organization or team. Part of teamwork is making small compromises and sacrifices so that the individuals can work as a group.