"Blackest" Names

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by Namaste27

I knew a sibling group, Lexxus, Toyota, and Cutlass

.

You win!

[mizzdavis]

I know two sisters named Egyptian and Assyrian...

A friend of mine's name is YoRel... which is Leroy spelled backwards and, you guessed it, her father's name...

A very close friend of mine [who will probably be mad at me if she ever finds this post] is named JaQualia {pronounced Juh-Kway-Luh} and has cussed out a countless number of people for telling her that her name is ghetto. When I received my roommate assignments my freshman year of college and I saw JaQualia and Aniequa, I knew they would both be AA...

[mccoyred]

Originally Posted by mizzdavis

I know two sisters named Egyptian and Assyrian...

I kind of like these...

[nikki1920]

I have an unusual first name. While I was pregnant, I seriously considered my child's name, and didn't want her FIRST name to be too 'ethnic' sounding. I saved the creativity for her middle name, which is Imani. I wish more people, in general, would take some thought into their childrens' names, other than, it just sounds pretty. I still scratch my head at Algae Crumpler. I work in social services and lordy, some of the names we give our kids!!! The poor chirren need to know the entire alphabet to spell their first name AFTER they learn that its NOT RayRay, ManMan, or Pookie (all names I have heard at work).

[lilbay77]

After Judge Cabrera’s historic ruling, little Clitoria Jackson will likely undergo a name change.

(DETROIT) In a decision that’s expected to send shockwaves through the African-American community—and yet, give much relief to teachers everywhere—a federal judge ruled today that black women no longer have independent naming rights for their children. Too many black children—and many adults—bear names that border on not even being words, he said.

“I am simply tired of these ridiculous names black women are giving their children,” said U.S. Federal Judge Ryan Cabrera before rendering his decision. “Someone had to put a stop to it.”

The rule applies to all black women, but Cabrera singled out impoverished mothers.

“They are the worst perpetrators,” he said. “They put in apostrophes where none are needed. They think a ‘Q’ is a must. There was a time when Shaniqua and Tawanda were names you dreaded. Now, if you’re a black girl, you hope you get a name as sensible as one of those.”

Few stepped forward to defend black women—and black women themselves seemed relieved.

“It’s so hard to keep coming up with something unique,” said Uneeqqi Jenkins, 22, an African-American mother of seven who survives on public assistance. Her children are named Daryl, Q’Antity, Uhlleejsha, Cray-Ig, Fellisittee, Tay’Sh’awn and Day’Shawndra.

Beginning in one week, at least three white people must agree with the name before a black mother can name her child.

“Hopefully we can see a lot more black children with sensible names like Jake and Connor,” Cabrera said.

His ruling stemmed from a lawsuit brought by a 13-year-old girl whose mother created her name using Incan hieroglyphics.

“She said it would make me stand out,” said the girl, whose name can’t be reproduced by The Peoples News’ technology. “But it’s really just stupid.”

The National Association of Elementary School Teachers celebrated Cabrera’s decision.

“Oh my God, the first day of school you’d be standing there sweating, looking at the list of names wondering ‘How do I pronounce Q’J’Q’Sha.’?” said Joyce Harmon, NAEST spokeswoman. “Is this even English?”

The practice of giving black children outlandish names began in the 1960s, when blacks were getting in touch with their African roots, said historian Corlione Vest. But even he admits it got out of hand.

“I have a niece who’s six. I’m embarrassed to say I can’t even pronounce her name,” said Vest, a professor at Princeton University. “Whenever I want to talk to her, I just wait until she looks at me and then I wave her over.”

Cabrera’s ruling exempted black men because so few of them are actually involved in their children’s lives.

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.
http://thepeoplesnews.wordpress.com/...-stupid-names/

[Fawn Liebowitz]

My bank teller's name today was Topeka, as in Kansas. I guess her mom just liked the way it sounded.

[bellwisdom]

Originally Posted by lilbay77

After Judge Cabrera’s historic ruling, little Clitoria Jackson will likely undergo a name change.

(DETROIT) In a decision that’s expected to send shockwaves through the African-American community—and yet, give much relief to teachers everywhere—a federal judge ruled today that black women no longer have independent naming rights for their children. Too many black children—and many adults—bear names that border on not even being words, he said.

“I am simply tired of these ridiculous names black women are giving their children,” said U.S. Federal Judge Ryan Cabrera before rendering his decision. “Someone had to put a stop to it.”

The rule applies to all black women, but Cabrera singled out impoverished mothers.

“They are the worst perpetrators,” he said. “They put in apostrophes where none are needed. They think a ‘Q’ is a must. There was a time when Shaniqua and Tawanda were names you dreaded. Now, if you’re a black girl, you hope you get a name as sensible as one of those.”

Few stepped forward to defend black women—and black women themselves seemed relieved.

“It’s so hard to keep coming up with something unique,” said Uneeqqi Jenkins, 22, an African-American mother of seven who survives on public assistance. Her children are named Daryl, Q’Antity, Uhlleejsha, Cray-Ig, Fellisittee, Tay’Sh’awn and Day’Shawndra.

Beginning in one week, at least three white people must agree with the name before a black mother can name her child.

“Hopefully we can see a lot more black children with sensible names like Jake and Connor,” Cabrera said.

His ruling stemmed from a lawsuit brought by a 13-year-old girl whose mother created her name using Incan hieroglyphics.

“She said it would make me stand out,” said the girl, whose name can’t be reproduced by The Peoples News’ technology. “But it’s really just stupid.”

The National Association of Elementary School Teachers celebrated Cabrera’s decision.

“Oh my God, the first day of school you’d be standing there sweating, looking at the list of names wondering ‘How do I pronounce Q’J’Q’Sha.’?” said Joyce Harmon, NAEST spokeswoman. “Is this even English?”

The practice of giving black children outlandish names began in the 1960s, when blacks were getting in touch with their African roots, said historian Corlione Vest. But even he admits it got out of hand.

“I have a niece who’s six. I’m embarrassed to say I can’t even pronounce her name,” said Vest, a professor at Princeton University. “Whenever I want to talk to her, I just wait until she looks at me and then I wave her over.”

Cabrera’s ruling exempted black men because so few of them are actually involved in their children’s lives.

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.
http://thepeoplesnews.wordpress.com/...-stupid-names/

Wow, that gave me a good laugh.

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by Fawn Liebowitz

My bank teller's name today was Topeka, as in Kansas. I guess her mom just liked the way it sounded.

It's not spelled, "T'Peeqa"?

[bellwisdom]

Originally Posted by tld221

ok, at the classic why was the lady at the ticket booth's name was Acquenetta?! i looked twice just to make sure i read it right.

Thats funny. My sister works at a hotel and I went to pick her up and the name of her co-worker was De' AquaNetta. But the funniest thing was the name of the guest that was checking in at the time. The girls name was Va' Gina. She had the nerve to get mad when Netta mispronounced it as Vagina Wilson. Well, I guess she could have said Ms. Wilson, lol.

[carnation]

The name of one of my husband's students that still fries his mind when he has to say it:

Reptipilis.

[Benzgirl]

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/236314...#TDY_Names_Bad

The worst, most humiliating baby names
Ancestry.com shares the silliest, craziest and downright cruelest names of all time

What would compel a parent to bestow a newborn with a name like “Tiny Hooker” or “Fanny Large”? Or an amusing choice like “Wanna Towell"? It’s not just Hollywood’s elite opting for unique, embarrassing names—throughout history, normal people separated their offspring from the masses with truly terrible names.
In “Bad Baby Names,” Michael Sherrod and Matthew Rayback, of the genealogy Web site Ancestry.com, share thousands of shocking names given to real people, as recorded by the U.S. Census Bureau. Discover the funny names based around common themes, like diseases (Fever Bender, Cholera Peace), food (Bread White, Pomegranate Purple), pets (Good Dog), and if you thought Wednesday Addams was unfortunate—wait till you meet Monday Monday.

[NappyBison]

I'm not sure if these names are as bad as the ones you all have mentioned but I thought they were worth naming.

Monopoly [I laugh everytime I see her]

Crayola [her nickname is Yola]

[Benzgirl]

Oh, poor Yola.