Maid of Honor advice?

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by BabyPiNK_FL

Honestly. this is somethign I've seen more recently at weddings. Having a friend who is NOT in the bridal party but is wearing a coordinating dress, be a hostess. She gets the presents to where they need to be, make sure everyone signs in the guestbook, takes care of last minute details and talks to caterers, bartenders, etc. on behalf of the bride. It's usually a close friend or relative. It can also be a man (host). Honestly I don't think that beyond bachlorette & bridal shower should a bridesmaid really be that busy (especially on the day of) when they need to be in the pictures too!

I did this for a cousin's wedding. The dress was cute too - the skirt was the same fabric as the bridesmaids, and the bodice was the same material as the flower girls - so I fit right in with them.

[sherbertlemons]

I would try to make my schedule as flexible as possible the week of the wedding. You don't have to devote a whole week to it, obviously, but it is nice if you're able to help the bride in a last minute crisis. For instance, I realized the day before my wedding that I had completely forgotten to pack for my honeymoon because of all of the before wedding craziness. My amazing maid of honor stayed up half the night with me helping me pack. It was beyond the call of duty, but I couldn't have been more grateful.

I would say that day of, you're not only responsible for making sure her dress looks good in photos, but if she has a train, you need to try to help her keep it clean in general. Don't forget to pick it up if she ends up walking outside! This happened to a friend- her maid of honor just didn't think of it.

[ForeverRoses]

The best thing (in my opinion) that the MOH can do is stay calm. And make sure the bride stays calm. When I was a MOH, both the bride and the Mother of the Bride were in freak-out mode all day. I ended up just doing everything and anything to keep them calm- like running interference from everyone who wanted to ask them questions.

So if someone comes looking for the bride to ask "where should we put XYZ"- answer the question for her. The only thing the bride should worry about is getting ready.

Oh, and don't let a nervous Mother of the Bride try and iron the veil. The veil WILL burn under a hot iron. I ended up "trimming" the veil without the bride ever knowing. (until after the wedding that is!)

[aephi alum]

The MOH should:
- Plan the bridal shower (unless you're a family member - the etiquette gods frown on family members planning their own sister's/daughter's/cousin's/etc. shower - in which case the MOH should be sure to attend the shower)
- Plan the bachelorette party
- Help the bride with whatever she needs (e.g. if she wants someone to help pick out flowers, a dress, etc.)
- Run interference for the bride on the day of the wedding (e.g. make sure no one whines to the bride if the band is too loud / the food is overcooked / the wine runs out / etc). The bride shouldn't have to worry about anything except getting married and enjoying her and her new husband's special day. The best man should be doing the same for the groom.

You may have other duties, too, depending on the specifics of the wedding. For example, DH and I had a Jewish wedding, and our MOH and best man signed our ketubah (marriage contract - which has to be witnessed by two adult Jews).

[CutiePie2000]

Originally Posted by aephi alum

You may have other duties, too, depending on the specifics of the wedding.

With regards to any "duties" (expressed or implied), I read this book , and you may opt to also, in case your friend morphs into a Bridezilla. It's nice to know that you're "not alone".

[KSUViolet06]

So she and I are going to be looking for bridesmaid dresses over the holiday break (I'm in grad school), any tips on how to go about that (like what to consider when choosing a dress) I know that the body types of the different girls are imprtant to consider, but anything else?

[Lady Pi Phi]

I too am the maid of honour for my best friend's wedding next year (September 2008).

These are all great tips, as I have never been MOH before.

As for dresses, we have already gone looking for dresses, and have found one we like. Do take into consideration the different bodies types of the bridesmaids. Try to pick a style that that is flattering to everyone. Also, keep in mind that sample dresses do not come in every size, so more than likely not everyone will be able to try on the dress. Depending on the size of the girls, sty away from dresses that are short and clingy. Dresses with rouching (sp?) in the midsection are very flattering on most girls, as it hides a multitude of flaws. A-line style dresses also flatter most people.

Check out designer Alfred Angelo, who makes dresses in 0-28W, and has seperates, so you can mix and match, in a wide variety of colours.

It also helps if you can bring the girls with you, to look at dresses, because they know what looks best on them.

[sherbertlemons]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

So she and I are going to be looking for bridesmaid dresses over the holiday break (I'm in grad school), any tips on how to go about that (like what to consider when choosing a dress) I know that the body types of the different girls are imprtant to consider, but anything else?

You may want to consider the brand of bridesmaid dresses I bought. I thought they were really beautiful and looked quite expensive considering how much they cost. Honestly, I liked them so much I wanted one for myself, and a couple of my bridesmaids have actually reused them.

http://www.morilee.com/DressDetail.aspx?C=3&D=441&P=1

That's actually the link to my dresses. Mine were floor length and turquoise. Just to give you an idea of how much the line runs, I think my bridal shop charged 132.00in late 2006.

In general, I would try to only take 1 or 2 bridesmaids with you. More and drama tends to happen. However, and this goes double if you don't know them well, I would ask if they have any special concerns with the dress. For instance, my moh (a redhead) vetoed fuschia, and another of my bridesmaids would have felt really uncomfortable showing cleavage. Even if every bridesmaid makes one request, it will probably be possible to honor all of them if you are picking one single dress.

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

So she and I are going to be looking for bridesmaid dresses over the holiday break (I'm in grad school), any tips on how to go about that (like what to consider when choosing a dress) I know that the body types of the different girls are imprtant to consider, but anything else?

It's not a legal marriage unless the bridesmaids' dresses have butt bows.

I attended a wedding a few years ago where the bridesmaids had very different body types. One was very tall, one was very short, one was about 7 months pregnant... The bride chose a very simple sleeveless princess-seam dress. It flattered everyone, even the pregnant woman.

My own personal feeling is that, if the bride picks out a specific dress for the bridesmaids (as opposed to telling everyone "go get a red cocktail dress you like" or whatever), it should be something simple, flattering, and something the bridesmaids would be happy to wear again. (My maid of honor is one of my sorority sisters. When another of our sisters got married, we were both invited... and my MOH wore her dress from my wedding )

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

So she and I are going to be looking for bridesmaid dresses over the holiday break (I'm in grad school), any tips on how to go about that (like what to consider when choosing a dress) I know that the body types of the different girls are imprtant to consider, but anything else?

Venue type - this will help you two determine style, length, etc. My friends wedding, for example, is going to be a beach wedding, so the bridesmaids are most definitely not wearing ballgowns

Fabrics - Satin, taffeta (sp), silk, etc etc (time of year of the wedding might also play into this?)

Cost - typically the bridesmaids themselves pay for the dresses (may not always be the case, but I haven't been in a wedding where the cost was picked up) so don't go crazy with a $400 dress, $70 shoes, and $40 in matching accessories

Colors - single color? color combinations?