Smoking Still?

preciousjeni · #1 07-15-2007, 02:18 AM

It's been two years since I last posted and I STILL want to smoke. I've been 100% smoke-free since 2004. Some days I leave work and think to myself, "self, one little cigarette isn't going to hurt, right?" I haven't yet caved to the desire but it sure is frustrating.

AGDee · #2 07-15-2007, 09:44 AM

I quit on Mother's Day this year, in honor of my mom, who is still going downhill very very slowly. I am still wanting one ALL THE TIME and in the "I feel insane" phase. I am taking it a few hours at a time. When it gets really, really bad, I make deals with myself like.. "If it's still this bad after work, I can buy a pack on the way home" or "If it's still this bad in the morning, I can buy a pack on the way to work". I get through those times, don't buy the pack and make the next deal with myself. I would love to be at a point where this isn't necessary. I also have a rebellious streak in that, if I think "I can't", then I want to more. So, I don't say that I can't have one, I tell myself that I'm choosing not to. One thing that has helped is that, on July 1st, my workplace went smoke free. There is no smoking anywhere on the grounds, even in your own car in the parking lot. The smokers are heading across the street to a bench in front of a firestation. It is really a relief that I'm not one of the people having to do that. The other thing that I am enjoying is the financial part. In Michigan, they are around $5 a pack and it's a relief to not have to be budgeting to make sure I have enough money for cigarettes each pay period.

On the downside, when I smell it on someone or walk past someone smoking, I LOVE the smell and want one so bad. And, I feel like I am constantly battling this and cannot relax 100%. I wish I had some inkling of how long it would be before I could laugh and relax and have fun without having to fight this battle, because, frankly, I find it exhausting.

I'm on Zyban and I'm using strongly flavored cinnamon things.. gum, mints, etc. The cinnamon Icebreaker mints help me a lot. Why? I dunno. That strong rough feeling in the throat I guess. I have gained 8 pounds, but most of that was in the first couple weeks and the weight gain has stopped for now, so that's a relief. If I only gain 8 pounds from quitting, I will consider that good.

PM_Mama00 · #3 07-15-2007, 09:51 AM

My dad quit cold turkey after his first angioplasty. I think he smoked about a pack and half of REDS a day. The scare from that surgery was enough to make him stop. He also went through a 100 bag of Dum Dums a week. They cured that oral fixation.

I could try to quit, but I get stressed out very easily and HAVE to have that cigarette or else I freak out.

AGDee · #4 07-15-2007, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PM_Mama00

My dad quit cold turkey after his first angioplasty. I think he smoked about a pack and half of REDS a day. The scare from that surgery was enough to make him stop. He also went through a 100 bag of Dum Dums a week. They cured that oral fixation.

I could try to quit, but I get stressed out very easily and HAVE to have that cigarette or else I freak out.

I just freak out now and then pull the "Sorry, I just quit smoking and my emotions are out of control" card. So far, it's worked out ok.

ccutoff · #5 07-15-2007, 03:10 PM

I personally don't get how anyone can start.

I was forced to take a week long tolerance course at the end of my senior year in high school(it was either that or miss the Prom). It was quite boring, but there was an optional cigarette portion of the tolerance course, because I guess you have to tolerate smokers and understand why they do it. I decided what the heck I will just see what its like. They had a pack of Marlboro Lights and I took one drag - didn't even inhale... it was sooooo disgusting. I was so ashamed of myself that I even bothered with it- and I felt disgusting and the aftertaste stayed in my mouth all day.

That "smokers tolerance" portion sure didn't help me at all, instead its just made me hate smoking and the smell of it even more. Each time I smell cigarette smoke it reminds me of that disgusting day at tolerance camp. I am guessing its an acquired taste.. but from what I remember it tasted like dog shit.

aephi alum · #6 07-15-2007, 07:37 PM

Just this afternoon, I met a living, breathing example of why smoking is a bad idea.

My father-in-law's mother has lived in a nursing home for the past few years. She just turned 99. A lot of the family came to celebrate her (possibly last

) birthday.

In the elevator, we met an elderly man. He was confined to an electric wheelchair, had a trake (sp?) ring, and was unable to speak. He could communicate only by honking a horn and some rudimentary sign language... we asked him what floor he wanted to go to, and he held up two fingers, so I hit the 2 button.

To be unable to speak, and perhaps unable to write... I'd rather die than go down that path.

AKA_Monet · #7 07-15-2007, 07:52 PM

Ladies and gentlemen,

I share your sentiments. What stops me is my "political thinking"... I have been smoke free for 4 years.

I am a casual binge smoker with menthol the "nastiest stuff". Like I said, I know that Phillip Morris et al. sticks stuff in their cigarettes that amplifies the effects of nicotine. People can make all kinds of justifications as to why it is not that crucial. But, one can also use the justification of legalizing marijuana and what is the worst that can happen with your pot?

However, I also know all the genes that are affected by these narcotics. The sad part, is if you start young it affects your development significantly and the effects are not seen until late 30's or 40's.

Please take care of yourselves and find a way to reduce your contact.