How to Soothe This Pain???

[Tom Earp]

While I am sure it hurts, but is there a chance that she can join another House?

While it may sound crass, things do happen.

One of My own low number Brothers (54) joined a Fraternity across the steet from ours.

We all got over it and He was happy so all was good.

As some have said, COB or I think a new wording COR is still a posibilty.

The best of Luck to your daughter.

[Southern Mom]

GAMom:

Please know there are others who have felt your pain. Several years ago, my daughter had the "perfect rush," with no cuts. When it came down to ranking her final choices prior to Pref, she ended up with her top two choices, and that is what she preffed (at her school, you only pref a maximum of two groups).

After Pref, she ranked her choices and signed her pref card. However, she did not "match" and therefore did not receive a bid.

Certainly, she was disappointed, particularly when she found out she was the only PNM who did not "match." However, she also recognized that had she changed the order of her choices, there might have been a different outcome. Oh, the coulda, shoulda, wouldas of life!

In retrospect, my daughter said it would have been better to have been cut earlier in the process and left with fewer choices, instead of having the "perfect rush" end as it did.

While my daughter's experience isn't quite the same as your daughter's experience, GA Mom, I do understand the pain. The good thing is, life goes on and if your daughter is anything like mine, she will be just fine.

[pinkyphimu]

i am sorry that your daughter's experience ended this way. it is wonderful that you are able to be there for her and to support her through this disappointment. when i was in college, i had broken up with a serious boyfriend and he ended up dating one of my sisters...who i also happened to live with. he basically lived at our house and it was horrific. my mom gave me a heart shaped ring and told me that although she was unable to be with me all the time, she wanted me to know that whenever i hurt, she hurt too. she told me the ring was to remind me that no matter where i was or what was happening that she would always be there taking some of my pain. it was wonderful (and made me cry harder). i still wear it when things are crazy in my life or when i just need my mom.

[Tom Earp]

The problem, is it does happen.

The price of a Big School is still numbers and that is what the NPC is trying to control is numbers and equallity among chapters at schools.

It can and does happen sadly enough.

The problem seems to be, that the most imortant things is not getting into a certain GLO as a Legacy.

What should be important is the feelings of the person and how she feels with the GLOs that she has come in contact with.

She may feel closer to those that she is not supposed to be by the legacy of Family.

She may have been much happier joining another and would not feel bad if she as a daughter and legacy would feel about?

It does happen many times over and wiil keep happening.

It is her life. Just try to be happy for Her if she finds a GLO that she feels right with.

[ZTAngel]

Her daughter was not a legacy. If you had actually read GaMom's post, you would have seen that.

[FSUZeta]

mom, please add my hugs to everyone elses-i cannot begin to imagine how hurt your daughter and you are feeling right now. i do hope that she is able to bounce back , carry her head high, get involved on campus and make lots of friends in the dorm and in her classes.

honeychile(as always) gave some wonderful advice and ucfadpi's sample letter was excellent!! please be sure to share their wise words with your daughter.

[ASUADPi]

If I could I would give your daughter a hug. I can't imagine the pain she is feeling.

I know it's not the same, but I transferred to another school and the chapter I was hoping to affiliate with denied my affiliation. I was absolutely heartbroken. I didn't understand why one chapter thought I was good enough to be their sister but this one didn't. I was so upset to the point where I removed my ADPi license plate from my car, took off my lavalier and stopped wearing my letters. I felt betrayed and didn't want to be associated with the sorority. I eventually put my license plate holder back on my car, started wearing my lavalier and letters again. And eventually a wonderful sister explained to me the details of my affiliation fiasco. I'm now actively involved with my sorority. I'm in my second year of philanthropy chair for the local alum association and I'm on the committee to recolonize my chapter of initiation. Everything turned out wondefully because I just let time heal my wounds.

I know what happened to me and what happened to your daughter aren't the same situations, but like I said, time heals all wounds. This too will pass and she will only grow and become stronger because of it.

I'm sure I sound really corny, but