what's the funniest thing you've ever heard a drunk person say?

[Still BLUTANG]

this thread is hilarious!

i had a horny drunk friend say "i'm f*cked. drunk me!"

[FHwku]

toward the end of a party in nashville, That Guy comes outside with his guitar. everyone was listen to the stereo, rockin' away pretty hard. Scenester Rock. that's when That Guy precedes to say, "shhh! shhh! everybody shutup, and then a few people help him shush everyone and turn the music down." the entire crowd of scenester kids stops to look, and That Guy starts playing "She Talks to Angels" (Black Crowes.) if you know any Scenester Kids, you know that they don't listen to Southern Rock much. shocked silence. the only person laughing was a 24-year-old oil painter, who thought it was just like a Will Ferrell skit.

That Guy ='s Me. i didn't really care for what they were listening to and i was very drunk and determined to rectify that situation. the painter just told me about this Friday at an engagement party for a mutual friend that i had to play. i fell out laughing.

[33girl]

I'm glad this got bumped. In a variant, I have to say the title of funniest drunk semi-karaoke I've ever heard (i.e. singing along to the jukebox) has been claimed by the guys on my birthday belting out "Do Re Mi" from Sound of Music and "Sing, Sing a Song" by the Carpenters. (Did I mention some semifamous local media guys were included in the group....LOL) And they knew EVERY SINGLE WORD.

[AOIIBrandi]

One of hubby's fraternity brothers: "I can't see and that's a f*ing problem".

[texgal]

My roommate and I got a little tipsy and ended up on the floor of our friend's apartment, rolling around, laughing, and telling our friend that she should just let us stay as her new carpet pals. My roommate actually said "Let us stay! We'll be as quiet as carpet, we'll be your carpet pals!!" (and we were being no where near quiet)

[Scandia]

My friend says that the craziest thing he ever did when drunk was that when someone complained that the champagne was no good, he took the bottle, emptied it out on the ground, and said "Evil be gone".

I know, quite tame. He was from France. He was accustomed to drinking alcohol since a young age. So the alcohol did not cause him to do truly regrettable things.

[MaryAmanda]

"2 + 2 = chair"