No one said it was gonna be easy... no one said it would be this hard

[pinkyphimu]

i am so sorry to hear about this. definately reach out to your friends because i am sure they are feeling the same way. counciling would be helpful too. sending you hugs...

[honeychile]

I agree with telling your advisor & instructors about what you're going through. They will better appreciate what you ARE able to accomplish at this time.

I also agree that Betarulz knows of what he speaks. Counseling can help you better understand that what you are feeling is perfectly normal. There are several books on dealing with grief, but right now, you probably don't feel like reading them. If you can, try to find one you like (Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's On Death and Dying comes to mind), and read it over break.

Many of these books will show a slippery slope, that will explain a lot of what you are/will be feeling. In a nutshell, it's a combination of five emotions spaced on a slope that indicates that you will slide back and forth through these emotions in the blink of an eye. They are:

Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

My best friend committed suicide several years ago in mid-December. I know he's gone, and I've been through all the steps. But, I know that, when that day comes, I will feel each one of those emotions, wondering if there was someway I could have stopped him.

Be good to yourself, and allow yourself to mourn while those who DON'T understand the dynamics of mourning will "let" you do so. And know that you can always come here, and we'll understand!

((((((((((((((((((((KLPDaisy))))))))))))))))))))))

[Tom Earp]

I cannot show crying on this site, but I am.

It is very, very hard to lose someone who You are close to and You will never forget them. Time will dull the pain, but the Memories of Her will always be with You which is good. She must have been special.

If You have another Best friend like I do, it might help to just sit and talk with them also.

Needing a little help is not wrong, it not a hand out, it is a hand up and that is something that You may be in need now.

Try to remember the good times and think, wow, did we have fun. Life is not forever but We all will go on. Think of Her being in a better place now.

Keep up the good thoughts and if You need, Many of Us are Here for You!

Just hang in, I know it is hard!

[GeekyPenguin]

Go see a counselor, definitely, but make sure you find one that you like.

Don't feel bad about feeling sad either, it is really a natural part of the grieving process.

I know what you're going through, and I really empathize with you. Feel free to email me if you ever want to talk about it.