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The groom should handle this if it is his side of the family that is being unreasonable. Maybe go to dinner with the objecting parties, or write an open letter to the family expressing how much they want everyone there, and clarifying the situation.
If it is going to be such an issue, the heck with the wedding. Elope!
And if his family is going to be so ugly and the fiance won't stand up to them, does this girl really want to become part of such a family.
You may think the open letter idea is silly, but if tastefully done, spelling out the situation may diffuse the tension.
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