Taking a break.

Dear Sisters and Friends!

Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement. Though the days aren't getting easier, they're definitely getting more bearable.

I've seen Brady once since Sunday, but that was just to drop off my essentials. He also called again tonight to see what I was up to and to tell me that he had my Blockbuster card. LOL. We didn't really touch on the status of our relationship...and I think it's understood that it's still too early to determine anything. He still seems reserved about the situation, so we'll talk when we're both ready to. This weekend we'll be doing stuff separately with our friends...and I can't wait because Dave and Buster's just opened last weekend and my friends all told me that it'll be their treat! One of our problems was that we weren't spending enough time with our own friends, and so it'll be great to reconnect with them again. We've had cordial conversations with each other so far, so at least the bickering has stopped. Although I am very terrified that he or even I may choose to move on, there's still that glimmer of hope that things can be worked out. Right now I am more frustrated than angry...and more confused than vengeful.

It's still hard though...I haven't had a decent meal since Saturday because I haven't had an appetite. It's weird not eating rice for so long! My mom's worried because all I've had to eat in the past few days are crackers, soup, and croissants. I've had a hard time sleeping too, so my mom gives me some Tylenol PM at night so that I'll have a good night's sleep.

I've requested extra hours at work so that'll keep me busy for a while. It doesn't help that midterms are here, but that's one more thing that's helping me not think of the situation! Each time I even try and feel sorry for myself, I can't help but think how selfish I am when I realize that there are others who are facing more difficult situations.

Some of you have emailed me and PM me and I just wanted to thank you too!

Oh well, back to my darned Japanese History essay.

Life is definitely very confusing.

Loyally,
Sandy