I wonder how many PNM's we have messed up on GC.

[James]

Seriously.

So many young impressionable girls come asking us young, and not so young, impressionable people . . . advice on a major life shaping decision that I would place on a par of picking which college to go to or which job to get.

And we give advice according to our inclincations.

At times we encourage the hopeless, "Oh my yes, at 40 with a 1.8 GPA you can definitely get a bid during SEC Formal Rush! Keep rushing each semester until you do!"

Othertimes we nudge people into doing what is unwise for them: "You can find a home anywhere, make sure you join the chapter that is populated only by social lepers with a foul stench and is likely to close at any moment!"

Sometimes we do it by misleading them: "Just try it! You can always drop out of pledging! (And we murmur sotto voice, of course then you can't pledge for a year and have the stigma of pledging the Leper chapter!)"

And then after four years of encouraging them to pledge unsuccessfully or nudging them into joining a group that gave a equivalent of the social experience the living dead get . . . we drop the BOMB:

"You go where you are meant to, obviously it was just Destiny or the Work of God that no sorority wanted you or you went to the one everyone else thinks sucks ass."

But wait, I am not done! Just as we have crushed them, and then told them that God Himself/Herself made them completely socially undesirable we say: " Well, don't feel totally left out, you can always AI!"

And not only do we do all that, we do it with the same sort of grim cheerful implacabality, and wide eyed internet grins of Cheer Camp Victims strung out on Crack and ecstasy.

I think we need to take a moment of silence in appreciation for all the PNM's we have just thoroughly confused and fucked up in some desperate attempt to be nice.

To all of you PNM's out there, I swear we are sorry and meant well.


The End.