Quote:
Originally posted by James
Actually. What I meant is that it appears that your own self destructiveness killed the relationship.
There is no reason for the kids conversation to result in a fight. What were you thinking?
And why would you give him attitude showing your hurt and defensiveness when he is coming back and trying to have a sincere dialogue?
How does that help at alll? The scorched earth tactic in relationships is neither useful nor mature.
I think what AKA_Monet was alluding at the end of her post was wondering how mature you could be under pressure.
Whether you controlled your emotions or they controlled you, and whether or not if you were upset you could effectively behave and reason as if you were not.
This situation is not indicative of a failure of your relationship, or even of him, but rather your emotional control.
So it might be to his benefit that you revealed yourself to be easily moved to anger and bitterness over small matters.
At least thats what his friends should be telling him.
Maybe you should call and apologize.
|
I'm not going to call and apologize for anything because I didn't start this mess. When I told him that we should go our separate ways because of the "fight" over the wanting kids, he agreed and that was the end of it.
Now, I may be emotional because he said to me that he didn't want to invest time with me because we wanted separate things out of life. I may have reacted out of anger, but that was not to him. I didn't have an attitude until Friday night when we went out for one reason which is because he would be lying to me just to appease me because I know he wanted me back. He would be trying to say anything to accomplish that goal.
I'm sorry, but once I detect BULL I don't just let it slide. He was lying to me and I could tell. The relationship ended because he wasn't ready to grow up and/or face the fact that kids (which he did not want) would be coming up in the future. He said this out of his own mouth.
Anyway, I'm not going to sit around and wait for him to get it together and when he does realize that he needs to grow up regardless and wants to come back to me, it will be WAY TOO LATE!!!! I am better off without him!
And one more thing: He has the same temperment that I do when it comes to certain things. If anyone got loud, it was him being loud with me because he started this whole mess and his usual antics were not working so he was frustrated.
Q