is this goodbye?

[rhosigmazeta]

I've been doing some thinking lately actually alot of thinking since last night and after the two girls didn't show up for our first meeting, my first thought process was to quit...Was Rho Sigma Zeta really worth all this? I don't know where it came from but just as quickly as the thought came, another came along with it. Rho Sigma Zeta is a part of me and even though I had been looking forward to this night for so long...It shouldn't bring me down like this. I mean at first I was distraught by abby's letter, but i kept going... then carmen's letter...which hindered me a bit...then last night when no one showed up...that's what got me. I mean I was hurt, angry, and just dumbfounded. I couldn't figure out why this was happening. So in all this thinking I started to reflect on things I had done, and I wrote brownsugar952 (?) another letter because the first one I sent probably was not very much of an apology it's as follows:


Hi ...,
It's Lauren from Rho Sigma Zeta. I got an email from social butterfly today. She said she talked to you and then I started thinking about how much we miss not having you
around and I'm glad you were there for her when she
was afraid at the Airport. I'm also glad you posted
your letter. After reading it a few more times I've
realized that we were really stupid about the way
everything was handled. None of us have the wrong idea
about you, perhaps at first, we might have been mad or
something at first. I guess I acted like ... and I
hate myself for that. She's not the person I want to
be. Anyways We're Sorry, I'm Sorry and we miss you!
You would have been a great asset to us. But anyways I
just wanted to say thanks for letting us get to know
you and for helping Mahria. I hope to see you around
campus, and if you see me please say hi! Bye ....

Lauren


I wrote it after I had gotten a Letter from social butterfly as to why she had not been there and even though It's what I expected I was relieved to find out that she was ok and she didn't skip out on us on purpose. Everything has just started to become so confusing with this organization and even though I want it work so badly...it's becoming harder and harder to believe that it will. And now i get on to see that Mahria quits...I'm not only shocked but also am just beginning to agian wonder why is this all happening, It all started to look up for a bit I had gotten a letter from Abby...the apology which means so much to me. It's nice for her to actually begin to support us. And me and Carmen are now ok after I had sent her that letter earlier this morning. Now social butterfly...
I do not see where the fact came from that we do not accept others advice I have taken many people's advice from Greek Chat and am trying to use it in the best way I can...But at this moment in time It seems that you are giving me the advice to just quit my dream...these people I have grown to trust and and seek advice from are of a sudden rejecting me I've never just stolen ideas or laughed in your faces I respect each and everyone of you who respects me. You were my friends. The people I came to. I don't think I'm better then any of you. I look up to alot of you that have offered me Wisdom and Advice.

As for Bros and Hoes I got that Idea from the Idea section or whatever as I got all the other Ideas for a Mixer from. I just took what was listed and made a compilation of them so that we could choose which we like best...just because it was there does not particularly mean that I want to do that...for all I cared we could have just had a plan regular party with snacks and pop...as long as you are having fun with people you want to have fun with...its a party to me...

Gina and I have put alot of work into establishing our organization...just because someone wanted to come in and change our colors and values doesn't mean that we are going to maybe if you had been there in May when we got this all started it would have been a more welcome change but how this is what we believe in, how can you expect us to just change it because you don't like a color or something? It's been so hard corresponding with a girl that contacted us from the internet...how can we learn to grow with her as part of the group if she couldn't be around to help us...we tried many times to plan a meeting and it was never done and then finally yesterday it was...and you did not show up. I'm continuing with my dream and love of sisterhood and helping children...wether or not greekchat supports me it's been nice knowing you all and thanks for the help...