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Optimist, sure you're normal...you're a normal guy!
There are just different cultural expectations for women. I have been in a situation where a psycho girl -- we're talking the kind of person who gives a whole room full of people the willies because she acts so crazy -- was very excited about joining my group. We had already cut her once. But when she came up to me all excited, I could never have said to her, "Listen, we just don't want you, and that's never going to change." That kind of bald truth would have, at best, made her run home sobbing and garnered me a community-wide reputation for being a coldhearted b!tch. At worst, we'd have been reading about her suicide in the campus paper the next day.
I don't think we should have taken her, but I do think we were right to try and soften the blow any way we could. We probably didn't do as good a job as we could have. She ended up flipping out over the second time she was cut, hitting her head on the wall in public, etc...very sad situation.
Ivy
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