stupid friend making big mistake

[maggieaxid]

alright gc'ers....listen to this: this is going to be very long, and involved post. perfect for a rainy monday morning!

one of my best friends in the whole wide world (she's an AOTT) and my maid of honor is making a huge mistake, but doesn't seem to care....

(a little background first...most of our friends are engaged or are recently married, she has been in several long and serious relationships, but they haven't lasted. the most recent one ended in May, she hates being single and swears there are no other men out there...we'll call her Nora and him Steve)

so nora dated steve right after college in 1999. noone liked steve, but we all kept our tounges. most of her friends and family (esp. her mother) thought he was a sneak and a liar...which he is. they broke up the first time bc she thought she was pregnant and he swore it wasn't his and called her a slut, wh**re, and a whole bunch of other names and said that she must be cheating on him and breaks up with her...which she wasn't and turns out she wasn't pregnant at all. AFTER she finds out she is fine he beggs for her forgiveness and they get back together from fall 2000- may 2002.
this most recent relationship of steve and nora's has been tumotuos to say the least. he has a huge problem with her making more money then him, he works two jobs so he is never around and has done a lot of SERIOUS drugs...(think white, powdery and in the nasal passages). well things were going totally down hill with the two of them. nora and steve were living together and it just wasn't working. while she was at work, he would be out to all hours of the night, and when he was home he wouldn't let her hang out with her friends bc he thought we were a bunch of stuck-up bitches. (ok, so we can be.... but maybe if he treated her right, we wouldn't be! and all of her guy friends hated him too!) and she would call all of us and cry and complain about him and the situation. So on May 1st, the shi-at finally hit the fan.
steve had been at work at the bar (he bartends, obviously) and didn't normally get home until about 1am. it was a weekday. well, she wakes up at about 2:30 and wonders where the heck he is. she calls his cell and he tells her he has to drive a "friend" home from the bar back to west chester...about an hour drive one way from where he works/they live. as he tells her this she hears a girl giggling in the car...later we find out her name is kelly. he tells her to go back to sleep and that he'll be home soon. APPARENTLY soon to him is 5:30am. He rolls in the door, admits to cheating on nora, calls her fat, disgusting, and a million other things and wants to break up and never wants to see her again.
so she is devastated, yet again. runs to all her friends, yet again. we hold our tounges and take care and console her. her mother allows her to move back home and she has spent endless nights sleeping on my pull out couch being miserable.
well, finally one day the light bulb in her head clicks on. she looses 30 lbs., gets a promotion at work, cuts her hair, and decides she doesn't need him at all. she starts seeing a shrink and we have our old nora back. she goes out on a few dates and we think everything is getting back to normal.
APPARENTLY we were wrong. it turns out for the last month she has been seeing steve again on the side. he tells her how much he has changed and how he loves her and wants to be with her, ect.. she buys into it. AGAIN.
so yesterday morning, she drops a huge bomb. THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED. when she told me i totally flipped out on her telling her that he is abusive towards her and how horrible he treats her, and why can't she see it, and how i can't deal with their relationship anymore....her mother has kicked her out, and all of our other friends are like "what the heck is going on???", one friend even bought a plane ticket from atlanta to come up here this coming weekend to talk to her.
so i don't know what to do. she is making a huge mistake. and granted, she is 25 years old, she is a big girl. but, this is soooo wrong! people don't change in 3 months!
-Maggie