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utgirl,
it has to do with mathematical formulas. You didn't meet the invitation "cutoff" point for any of the chapters, based on mathematics (RFM). The Why is something we cannot answer.
Yes, it hurts. It will only continue to hurt if you dwell on it and wallow in it. I might refer you to The Work by Byron Katie (google it - she has YouTube videos) as a means of handling this situation you find yourself in.
FWIW one of my favorite Thetas is a woman that was released from recruitment her freshman year. She focused on her academics and on behaving herself and on involving herself in some campus activities. And she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went through recruitment the following year. We talked about it afterwards, when she opened up about her freshman experience, and she shared how hurt she was as a freshman, but that she was grateful that she'd had her freshman year to grow up and adjust to college.
__________________
"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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