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I'd say alum chapter. I had to make that same decision and alum chapters are good ways to meet potential friends in new cities.
As far as "different places:" I spent Sunday with one of my best friends from college (non-Greek). I didn't realize how far apart we've grown--different places career-wise, socially, and how we spend our time. I also got to meet one of her good friends from graduate school, and they're just much more appropriate for each other. These things happen, and I guess it's how we deal with it that matters. I wouldn't specifically defriend her or cut her off, but I expect that we'll grow apart as our lives change even more.
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