Is it too late for me?

[grkhope]

I need some honest advise from you all … sorry for the long story.

I am in my sophomore year at a large, private university. We only have 9 sororities and it is very competitive. I am an out-of-state student, so I have to fly to get home to my family, while most of my friends I have met on campus last year.

As a freshman (last year), I decided to go through rush. I didn’t know anything about rush and my family didn’t have any experience with it either. As I was going through, I fell in love with one sorority. I was very fortunate because I was asked back to the maximum number of houses each day – with the one sorority I loved being my top choice on pref day. At the time, I just didn’t picture my self with any other house at all …. Didn’t even enter my mind that they wouldn’t choose me on bid night. But that was exactly what happened. I was so devastated and hurt that I couldn’t think past my shock and pain to even give the house that gave me a bid a chance. I just had never pictured myself in that sorority or gave it a chance at all …. I just turned down the bid that night.

Well, as I matured through that year and realized that I would truly be happy in almost any of the sororities, I decided to give rush a try this fall again with the open mind that I would accept the bid I was offered. It never occurred to me that all the houses would drop me on the third day. I did not even make to the last two days. To top that, my two roommates pledged to houses (one of them to the house I loved last year).

Could I have been ‘black-balled’ due to turning down a bid last year?

If my roommates put in a good word for me at their new sororites, could I possibly get a ‘silent-bid’ during spring rush. Since I didn’t get a bid this year, I assume I can participate in spring rush (even though I am not planning on signing up). Do I have to formally sign up for spring rush to get a ‘silent-bid’?

Am I too old, now that I will be a junior next year?

I really wish I had understood the repercussions of not accepting the bid when I was a freshman – I was so confused and hurt. I now know that I would have loved the house that gave me the bid – but I just couldn’t get past my shock and pain at the time.

Your honest advise would be greatly appreciated.