Asking for help

[lifesaver]

Stay clear of this tool. as for fraternities, guys will turn on a chick ina heartbeat, and make you very uncomfortable, even when you were trying to help. Example: A few years ago, a NM of my chapter said some stuff about the chapter president not having balls to deal with smack talking by another org. (he was showing amazing restraint in the face of being bated to say something to get us in trouble.) Anyway, a chica who was a good friend of mine and a constant supporter of the chapter was there and heard it. she told a few of us. It was brought up behind closed doors and I swear, even tho half of the chapter generally liked her, the first thing outta many brothers mouths was, "what the fu*k are we doing listening to some chick about this?" "This is our fraternity."

Guys are really schetchy when it comes to girls being involved (right or wrong) in the internal affairs of their chapters. Some brothers will resent you for it. While yes, it does involve you, you can controll your involvment with it.

One point of clarity: I really REALLY rather doubt an emplyer would comment to an interviewee on somethign they heard. Not only is it unprofessional, its ILLEGAL. Employeers can't legally even inquire about your marital status or number of childern in an interview. I gurantee HR staffs have been trained adequately in legal issues in this arena to avoid litigation. Companies consider these things a part of their risk management strategies. So Ima gonna have to call bullshit on his claim here.

Most likely, he was using that claim to get you riled up as well, and as an effort to underscore the believed, "importance" of the issue. Whats more important than someones livelyhood? Thats how he could get you to care too. Also I believe thats a part of how he tests for your perceptions of him, then the constant badgering is a way of him getting reaffermation form you...validation if you will.

Also, realistically, in society, how bad are guys viewed who "get a lot of action" Unless they are players abou tit, most of the time its deserving of a hearty slap on the back for the "conquests" (Not saying its right, just generally the way it is.) Most of the guys I know wouldnt be freaked out by that rep, hell, most of the guys I know HAVE that rep.

*lifesaver grabs the microphone at the freakstore*
<<I need a reality check on aisle 9 please>>

So I think this guy is tool factor 10. Stay outta the subject entirely. You stated in your story how vigorously he wanted to find the author of the rumor about him, and now you are considering becoming the author of what could get him booted from his org? Are you MAD? As my red-neck mama would say, "sounds like a damn good way to get youself hurt." Where is this loyalty to an org YOU DONT EVEN BELONG TO come from? You willingness to help is gonna get you in trouble.

One more thing...when Mark/Mike whatever DOES SNAP and starts stalking your sisters and making their lives a living hell, who do you think they'll ultimately blame...him, or you?

Just some thoughts. Take care of yourself. In the end, you're all you've got.