My kids were pretty spoiled before the divorce. Everytime we went into a store they got something, even if it was something small. That had to stop after the divorce because I just didn't have the money and I think that was a good thing. My kids aren't wanting for anything, but I get good deals or get them used/refurbished stuff (computers, Ipods, etc.) My daughter is the "I want" kid. She is a bottomless pit. She keeps a running list of her "needs" and I prioritize them (jeans, tops, socks, red flats, etc.) and get things when I can. I don't do school shopping with her where we get a whole year's wardrobe because that just doesn't work with her. It's better to buy her something every month than to buy it all at once.
When your kids get a little older, you can do things like my mom did. When I wanted contact lenses and she wasn't sure I would take care of them, I had to pay half. She would give me a school clothes allowance. That was all the money I got for school clothes. If I wanted to buy 2 pairs of designer jeans and no other pants, fine. If I wanted different pants for each day of the week, I had to get cheaper stuff. It helped me learn to budget. The kids definitely learned that they can't have everything they want, or the best of everything all the time without some sacrifice or work. I think it's an important lesson, especially as they get older.
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